Jammin' at the Jive

Subject: Drones create groans

Dear President Obama,

I write to you as a concerned citizen of Pakistan (the one next to Afghanistan). First of all, congratulations on becoming the first black president of the USA. Your victory has reaffirmed my faith in mankind and the American Dream.

You will be surprised Barack (Can I call you Barack?) how much we have in common; your people and mine. Like your ancestors, we’re also a nation of cotton pickers. Like your people, we get the blues…practically on a daily basis. In fact, I have compiled a list of Blues standards doing the rounds in ‘dhaabas� (local bars) and whorehouses.

Side A
No Rice, No Dice Blues
Woman, where’s my wheat?
Mama don’t send your kids to Madrassahs
I see the light (even in the dark)

Side B
I broker heart (and sold my stocks)
Waltz for Democracy
Even birds get the blues
You give me Dengue Fever

Which brings me to my point. Sir, I implore you to look into your heart. Your military operations in Waziristan are killing innocent people. Give them food. Give them education. Don’t show them the way of the gun.

We’re in this together, Barack bhai. 160 million brown men behind one black man. United we stand, divided we crawl.

Regards,

Minister of Tourism, Swat.

________________________________________________

Jammin’ at the jive
Keep the engine alive
Coffee black
All set for attack
Pound Waziristan
Stick it to the man
Turn a new page
Back to stone age
Orders are orders
And orders stand
Give us that old time
Crash Boom Bang
Standby Charlie
Oh!
We have a Go
Do them good
Understood?
Time to kick some ass
Check this thing for gas
Run while you can
We ain’t Made in Taiwan
There’s still time to switch loyalties
Choose between vermin and fleas
Eat our heaven sent wheat
Your people are deadmeat
Caves can’t be too much fun
A Muslim prayer and a Russian gun
It’s begun
Strike one
Strike two
Strike who?
Ladies and gentlemen
The shit has hit the fan
Coming at ya Live
Jammin’ at the jive
Brought to you by CNN
Let’s get word from the Pigpen
Ants in your pants
So you think you can dance?
You’re America’s Most Wanted
Devil’s Apprentices
Bad boys, bad boys…
Try this one on for size
Remember folks
No jokes
This is a war against terror
No room for human error
The enemy is a sitting duck
Godspeed and good luck
Shoot them in the dark
A walk in the park
Hit them where it hurts
A cruise for every scud
Doom for every dud
It’s all about staying alive
Beats your normal 9-5
Jammin’ at the jive.