Why Did Led Zeppelin Name the Song Kashmir?

Led Zeppelin, one of the consensus molds from which Rock and Roll was forged, is an archetype of the post-modern Western mind (if indeed one may posit a mind to anyone somehow interested in the besotted history of the array of criminals and pedophiles called Rock and Roll stars). On their best album (which is actually two albums, thereby allowing it to win on the basis of quantity if not quality), "Physical Graffiti", one of their more compelling compositions, Kashmir, is the anchor track. The purpose of this short article is to posit why the name was chosen for this song.

First, of course, some caveats. Exigencies of article length require focusing solely on the facts of the song and band. Even this modest focus, however, yields difficulties. These include (a) the fact that the song is now a quarter century old, (b) one member (John Bonham) of the band perished as a consequence of what can best be described as suffocation induced by glossopharyngeal-associated regurgitation nearly twenty years ago, (c) the author has no intimacy with the band, and (d) the author, quite frankly, is both too lazy and disinterested to do any real research on the matter. This means that all information presented herein will be either (a) speculation, (b) opinion or (c) outright mendacity. Moreover, given one band member's (Jimmy Page's) taste for 13-year old girls and another band member's ignominious end (see above), I have probably lost my ability to treat them fairly, let alone impartially. If these limitations frighten you, dear reader, please spend your time elsewhere.

The first and obvious explanation of the song's title is that the music is representative of the music of Kashmir. I outright refute this. There is, in the song, synthesized drumming and guitar work that best falls into the category of 1970's British rock (stunningly insightful, no?). Moreover, the interwoven "ethnic" music is more reminiscent of the music indigenous to the Middle East, not South Asia. One could readily assume that Led Zeppelin fell victim to stereotyping all peoples in the broad swath from Morocco to Bangladesh as producing similar music. However, I am willing to give them the benefit of doubt on this one due to their probable (a) lack of geographical prowess, (b) lack of careful, painstaking musical research, and (c) lack of sobriety during much of their waking hours. Nevertheless, it is safe to say that the song "Kashmir" is in no way representative of the type of music one may expect to hear in a Kashmir night club, cyber-café or wedding (unless, of course, they are Led Zeppelin fans…).

A second explanation for the song's title is that Led Zeppelin, concerned by the international and internecine strife in Kashmir, was in some way making a political, social or hegemonial statement with regard to the region. Historically, indeed, such an interpretation would be rational, and a group of folks with the potential influence of Led Zeppelin could bring attention to an oft-neglected territorial dispute (Pardon the play on words, but Kashmir is much larger than any of the Balkanized nations formerly known as Yugoslavia, for example). This hypothesis cannot be substantiated, however. First, Led Zeppelin's motif was not usually politically or socio-politically oriented (songs such as "Ramble On" and "Whole Lotta Love", with their insightful explorations of the pertinent issues of "Lord of the Rings" and sex, respectively, are more representative of their genre of lyrical content). Certainly, with the regnant atmosphere of protest in the songs of the late 1960's and early 1970's, Led Zeppelin had every opportunity to write the often self-serving diatribe characteristic of even later groups such as U2. However, having become popular without having to do more than throw a few syllables between Robert Plant's vocal excursions (some call these screams), Led Zeppelin quite possibly never wrote a political or protest song. Foe example, their song "Hot Dog" was a not a PETA anthem about the cruelty of leaving one's pet in a closed car whilst one shops in the Phoenix summer; "Moby Dick" was not adopted as the campaign song by the "Save the Whales" foundation; "Communication Breakdown" was not an exposé on cynical telecommunication practices; "Livin' Lovin' Maid" was not a critical evaluation of the interrelationship between the upper and working classes; even the "Immigrant Song", which could well have addressed issues of language and privilege barriers facing new immigrants, derailed into an odd combination of "ice and snow" allusions and Robert Plant's scream-singing. In fact, even a cursory consideration of the lyrical contents of "Kashmir" evidence a lack of serious consideration of any issue: "Of my love the storm it leaves no trace"; "Ooh, my babe, let me take you there." As John Cleese of Monty Python fame said in a now-famous skit ("Pet Shop") the same year that the song was released, "What kind of talk is that!?" Or, to quote Gerald Ford, president of the United States at the time, in one of his more insightful moments, "Huh?" The song contains, despite its ponderous length (nine minutes), a relative paucity of lyrical content; and what content there is bespeaks a confusion of Kashmir for Shangri-La. Moreover, it is likely, though not immediately authenticated, that no member of Led Zeppelin could (or can) even define the words "hegemony", "socio-political", or indeed most other words unusual enough to be comprised of multiple syllables.

Thus, a third explanation must be proffered. Skeptically, one might argue that Led Zeppelin had no idea why they picked the song title. They may have (a) heard the word Kashmir somewhere and liked its sound, (b) randomly opened an Atlas (I'd say "dictionary", but then there is no historical evidence suggesting possession of such an item by any band member) and pointed to it, (c) independently made up the word and serendipitously picked an actual region name, or (d) chosen the name "Ream Jack", whoever Jack was, and in their prevalent devil-worshipping canny sung this message backwards, over and over again, to see who would figure out the subliminal message. I dispel all four of these possibilities out of hand-not out of confidence in the band (while arguably they were quite skilled musicians, any extant interview footage or text reveals an obvious deficiency in most areas considered evidence of "intellectual prowess" or indeed "synaptic transmission")-rather out of an innate feeling and by using an assumption that, out of their own naivete or limited Weltanschauung, Led Zeppelin chose the name "Kashmir" for a far simpler reason. This reason, of course, is the association of the name "Kashmir" with its regions of poppy-based agriculture.

Why this reason? First, Kashmir is associated with poppy (especially in the U.K., which is after all the band's homeland). Second, Led Zeppelin is associated with poppy (Jimmy Page, in fact, was recently declared a UNESCO World Heritage Site as an extant example of an organically-based heroine-processing factory). The band, including its groupies, roadies and other camp-followers, sponsored enough illicit drug production to keep afloat at least a cartel or two. Third, elements of the song, namely allusions to sex and faraway places, are indicative of the mental freedom and/or hypnagogic hallucinations generally associated with the imbibing of products derived from plants that can be grown in the region called Kashmir. Certainly, this is a simplistic interpretation. Let's not give them any more credit than they have earned.

Note: Jimmy Page, in fact, was recently declared a UNESCO World Heritage Site as an extant example of an organically-based heroine-processing factory"