Feminist Mumbo-Jumbo!

“Oh my dear God! You used the F-word?� No, it is not a mother scolding her child for swearing, but expressing her shock at the use of the word ‘feminism’. What indeed is feminism? To ask a man, who has grown up in a dominant patriarchal society (such as me), to define feminism is asking for an opinion or definition, prone to prejudice and stereotype. The typical male definition of feminism, is a group of women propagating a philosophy and following the maxim that all men are chauvinist pigs. Also, that all feminists are hardcore man haters. Needless to say implies that only women are or can be feminists and the men who support them are either sissies or against being a man.

Nothing in fact could be farther from the truth. Feminists are not man haters at all, feminism is not a male hate group of women, and it is in fact the union of ideology and activism. A critical philosophy, a way of life, a critical look at the patriarchal society that dominates the world, even feminist philosophers have not been able to give a single definition. Some of the currently used definitions are: (a) a doctrine advocating social and political rights for women equal to those of men; (b) an organized movement for the attainment of these rights; (c) the assertion of the claims of women as a group and the body of theory women have created; (d) belief in the necessity of large-scale social change in order to increase the power of women.

“I myself have never been able to figure out precisely what feminism is: I only know that people call me a feminist whenever I express sentiments that differentiate me from a doormat.�
- Rebecca West in ‘The Clarion’, 1913.


Where do men come into feminism? Is there such a thing as male feminism? Can a man be a feminist at all? Some thoughts men/boys have, which make them doubt their support. Add to that the male stereotype, and patriarchal society, reinforces the paradigm that they should give up such blasphemous thinking. Personally I had these doubts myself and tried umpteen times to justify the ‘Male Gaze’ (ogling and lewd gawking) believing that women at most times overreacted until I saw a documentary ‘Unlimited Girls’ (Dir. Paromita Vohra) about feminism. Shattering the notion I had of being a feminist and a female supporter, also encouraging the change in thought of actually becoming one.

Men can most definitely be feminists, it is not unmanly, nor is it being a sissy and dominated by women. Patriarchal society has ingrained in us so deeply the thought that women are lesser to men, that it is bound to surface (even if it is subconscious). Unlearning many rules and customs taught to me, I had a hurdle to climb and something so simple as a documentary film brought in that realisation. Such is the dominance of patriarchy that mothers, mother-in-laws, grandmothers and even sometimes sisters reinforce the superiority of the man. “A woman is a woman’s biggest enemy!� is it not centuries of male domination speaking through a woman? Life does not exist beyond the patriarchal male dominated society, for a woman and more so a man who cannot think or know otherwise, it is an unnatural deviation from life.

Is asking to be treated equally wrong? Some uncomfortable questions feminists ask, and why not? ‘Service to man is service to God!’ Man includes women, mankind includes women. Why think of them as lesser beings? Why refer to women as ‘them’? Mere physical differences cannot be the reason for discrimination (even in the most subtle form). Men hide behind the veil of religion, which according to them advocates that women are indeed the lesser being. The right to give birth, to grant life, is that what makes women lesser mortals? Religion interpreted (in most cases twisted) by men for men, to uphold the ‘values’ of a patriarchal society. Men, we have a long way to go before women trust us completely. What do women want? they want, what they deserved from the very beginning, the respect and equality, which is not a male prerogative.