Brick in the Wall

I don’t have to sing for my supper, but as a nightcap I like to sometimes hum. That is the difference between helplessness and desire. I have a repertoire to choose from, other singers have sung those lyrics; the words are not theirs. But they made them their own.

The other night as I sang, my voice cracked. It had gone dry, drier than the martini. Yet, I continued – the words were not mine, someone before had sung them far better, but I knew I sounded different. No glass panes broke, no sudden showers wet the soil, and no lights were set ablaze.

There were a few ears listening. And they were not seeking another’s voice or another’s words in mine …I was merely adding what I could; sometimes it means having to furiously suck on a lozenge to soothe the throat. I have no problem coming out as raw and therefore am ready to take the arrows aimed my way.

“Who is Chowk staff?” was the question asked several times until just the other day, appended with adjectives about cowardice, invisibility and waywardness. Now, when I am here to take responsibility, the comment being made is about how you miss the ‘enigma’ that was Chowk!

Honest, I can wriggle out a Mona Lisa smile for you anyday, but don’t you feel that you are at least dealing with a person you know?

I am most certainly not going to defend myself or provide explanations; I have no intention of going into grandiose ‘plans’. I will admit that there are things that need to be fixed, mistakes have been made and will be made. Forget the building of Rome, even good nihari and dum-pukht biryani have to be marinated and kept simmering for a long time. This too will take some time.

Have you downloaded the latest version of the messenger services provided by the big portals? Are you aware that these ran as beta versions? Do you know what this means? That you were the guinea pig. They were testing their ability and credibility using you.

Chowk has not done that. It has given you the power to be yourself – together with that power comes responsibility. Clearly, not everyone is equipped for that.

I did think ‘Echoes’ was a good idea. I do not like using terms like ‘democracy’ loosely, but it was to be your space. It did not mean that whatever you said there was the final word. No word is final. Finality is death.

I am not starting out with a clean slate. Chowk has a history and a baggage. The history does not need validation. The baggage needs to be updated for a longer and, one hopes, even more enlightening journey.

You were to help me throw out the flotsam. Except for a very few, this did not happen. Not for a moment did I think of ‘A Voice’ and ‘Echoes’ as separate, but the latter has been abused blatantly. For now you may continue to interact, but these responses will be selected as per already-established guidelines.

You can vent your anger and ardour on Unplugged.

To address some of the concrete and well-intentioned suggestions:

The self-publish section has been brought to the front page to give other writers visibility. You will crib about the decisions I make regarding what is published on the front page. This is your opportunity to see all that we get, and that is an average five articles a day.

The teaser near the ilogs is there for two reasons: 1. To make the whole community feel as much a part of the mainstream Chowk as is possible. 2. To give the uninitiated reader an idea. Just for general information, there are several non-registered users who look in. Last night the page download was 64,000.

It is important for the wayfarers to be given choices so that they stay. It is for this reason that the ‘Explore Chowk’ and ‘Topics’ are there, so that people can access and see for themselves the work available at a glance. Let us not be incestuous and territorial. The more voices we have, the better will be our ability to speak out loud and clear.

I have always been against the peer rating system for interactors. It will be done away with.

Carrying pictures of columnists is nothing new. Some have a well-entrenched identity, others will grow on you. One hopes they will be read for what they come to stand for. It is a pleasure dealing with people who are professional in their approach. For the record, no one has been asked to leave; some have been asked to rethink and we understand that it takes time.

I am surprised by the remarks about the ethical implications of an editor also being a contributing writer. Almost every newspaper/magazine Ed writes. The difference is they do not stick their necks out to be slaughtered, the halal or the jhatka way, as I am doing. If you thought I would suddenly acquire this beatific expression and sprout tremulous wings, then let such thoughts blow away with the wind. I have my opinions and biases, if you will, but not once as an interactor on my boards have I dismissed another point of view. I shall apply this same attitude to my new role.

“Does the role come with so many colours?” you wonder. I think the prevalent view is to temper the shades. There is no emotional attachment/prejudice towards any of them, so we will work on those.

The sections will have a shape and you will get used to them. Anyone can write for those and we do welcome interesting points of view. The ‘Featured’ writers are those who have contributed a body of work to Chowk or will do so. It is our way of saying thank you and hang in there.

There will be people you do not like, but you have the option to express dissent. Just do it in a manner that you do not come out looking bad. Really, I feel horrible when I find people stoop low because not many are going to bend down to even glance at them.

I am told this is bound to happen. When a suggestion is made to drop Indo-Pak contemporary discussions, I begin to ponder. What would South Asia be without it? Is there someone who can give us a perspective on Indo-Srilankan or Pak-Nepali relations? That would be a wonderful change. Yet, we do not need to amputate one limb to justify the existence of another.

There will be history, there will be literature, there will be travelogues, there will be social issues. Who told you we are divorcing ourselves from reality? Join us and extend our reality, too. The pontificators have been around long before I came in telling Chowk what should be done. What are you doing about it? Come on, wake up and smell the streets instead of musty books. The streets have no shelf life, they are dynamic. They make those books.

When someone responds to me with a “We don’t expect - we demand a revolution! Please provide!!!” I can only say that you’ve got to walk the same road. I know there will be those who follow and some may be trailing behind only to deliver a kick.

It is gratifying, though, that those who do not visit FP or even interact have become active. Do you need more proof of their fealty towards Chowk? I can take it on the chin, but I won’t move on. I will challenge that fist. A zombie walking through walls is not what you will get.