Killing Xanatron

Back in the day
When Michael Jackson had a nose
And Ronald Regan was president,
Video Games were fun to play.

Space Invaders,
Defender and Donkey Kong
Were about shooting
Or just running away.

But now there are Sony Play Stations
Nintendos and complications
That will not go away.

The controls are difficult
The moves are secret
Hidden in magazines
We must study to play.

My young cousin and his PlayStation
Came to stay
We started a game
But questions were asked
Before we could play.

We selected Romulus the warrior
His shield
The Space Ship
His Laser weapons
And even vitamins for his trip.

Then there was a life story
About Romulus
And how he became this way
His village destroyed by Evil Robots,
His kid brother held prisoner,
And the big breasted princess he must rescue today.


About the instructions I heard my cousin say:
Up Down Left Right to Kick
Right Up Left Down to Block
Down Right Diagonal Left to Box
I said: Whatever
Let’s just play
Ok?


In the middle of a scary jungle stood Romulus
Surrounded by Dragons but standing still
I pushed all the buttons
Romulus obeyed
Swinging his sword wildly
Somersaulting and giving kicks
Even to Trees
Finally he struck a scary looking beast

Young cousin shouted: Look what you did!
That was Xanatron from galaxy sector Five
A loving vegetarian dragon with wings
He was an ally not the enemy
Our only ride out of hostile territory
You should have known
Oh Why didn’t you read his biography?

Sorry kid brother
A prisoner you stay
Sorry Princess
You will not be rescued today
Oh yeah… sorry Xanatron
It was all a big mistake.

I like to remember a game that was easier to play
Before Candies became Calories
And We became Salaries
Round Yellow Pacman ruled the day.