How’s It Gonna Be

Original article, posted on author's request
She saw his reflection in the mirror as he entered the restaurant. She had her back to him so he did not see her. It was very cold that night. Cold and foggy. He was wearing a big, black shawl over his black kameez shalwar. She didn’t recognize him for half a second.

Female appreciation for a good looking man was the first signal that was sent to her brain. Then recognition hit her like a bucket of ice cold water; his reflection in the mirror made her freeze for a second. She hoped he wouldn’t look her way and tried to avert her eyes away from his tall frame entering the restaurant. But she could not stop looking at him. He stopped near her .table for a minute, while the rest of his family gathered around.

For her, it seemed as if time had stopped. She knew it was a cliché! Stop being dramatic!
Time doesn’t stop background voices don’t fade away. But they did. They did fade away and those 15 seconds stretched forever. He moved away, went to the upper level of the cafe, not once looking her way. The spell was broken by her mother calling her name, telling her to order the food. The waiter had been standing for a few minutes now, writing pad in hand. She felt her cheeks flush and forced herself to concentrate.

Dinner was ordered. Her brothers and a guest who was staying at their place for a few days insisted that they wanted to go upstairs and look at the view from the roof, for which the restaurant was famous. She hesitated, knowing he would be upstairs. But how long can you avoid someone? A lyric came in mind and almost made her smile:
“How’s it gonna be when you don’t know me anymore?”

Well, now’s the time to find out, she said silently to herself. She got up with everyone else and made her way up the steep staircase.

The rooftop view of the restaurant is breath catching. It overlooks Lahore’s Badshahi Mosque, which is all lit up with glowing lights. She had come to the same café two years ago for the first time, ironically with him. She was still trying to cope with the memories of that night when she saw him again, same place, even the same date; the difference was that two years had elapsed. Laughable. The coincidence was ironic and even funny at some level.

But right then, nothing seemed amusing. From the corner of her eye she saw him, sitting on a table with his family. His back was towards her so she knew he still hadn’t spotted her. She joined her own family at the front of the rooftop, which was full of people dining out. The air was freezing cold but the hot coals that were provided for every table were doing a good job of keeping everyone warm and happy. The atmosphere was charged. The night was young, the stars were out, and the chill in the air was intoxicating. Piping hot naans were being eaten, accompanied by cold Coca Cola.

She knew the exact moment he saw her, even though she did not meet his eyes. She had been laughing at something her brother had said, when, from the corner of her eye, she saw him turn, saw him look her way. He kept looking. She turned her head, their eyes might have met for half a second, but it was too dark to tell for sure. He saw her, recognized her – and turned away. She held back sudden tears that had unexpectedly welled in her eyes. “How’s it gonna be when you don’t know me anymore?”

She spent a few minutes on the roof, trying not to stare at him, trying to pretend to be happy and in a cheerful mood, oohing and aahing over the view which was mysteriously swimming before her eyes. She took one last look at him. He looked her way again. They both looked away. So, how is it going to be when you don’t know me anymore? It’s going to be heart clenching and painful. It’s going to be difficult to look at you, see recognition in your eyes but no effort to acknowledge the past. It’s going to be sad not to hear a greeting pass your lips, when I had become so used to the sound of your voice. But most of all, it’s going to be a relief, because once and for all, I have got closure, for now we are officially complete strangers.


Edited version, posted earlier
She saw his reflection in the mirror as he entered the restaurant. She had her back to him so he did not see her. It was very cold that night. Cold and foggy. He was wearing a big, black shawl over his black kameez shalwar. She didn’t recognize him for half a second.

Female appreciation for a good looking man was the first signal that was sent to her brain. Then recognition hit her like a bucket of ice cold water; his reflection in the mirror made her freeze for a second. She hoped he wouldn’t look her way and tried to avert her eyes away from his tall frame entering the restaurant. But she could not stop looking at him. He paused near her table while the rest of his family gathered around.

For her, it seemed as if time had stopped. She knew it was a cliché! Stop being dramatic!

Time doesn’t stop, background voices don’t fade away. But they did. They did fade away and those few seconds stretched forever. He moved away, went to the upper level of the cafe, not once looking her way. The spell was broken by her mother asking her to order the food. The waiter had been standing for a few minutes now, writing pad in hand. She felt her cheeks flush and forced herself to concentrate.

Dinner was ordered. Her brothers and a guest who was staying at their place for a few days insisted that they wanted to go upstairs. The restaurant was famous for the view of the old town. She hesitated, knowing he would be upstairs. But how long can you avoid someone? A lyric came in mind and almost made her smile: “How’s it gonna be when you don’t know me anymore?”

Well, now’s the time to find out, she said silently to herself. She got up with everyone else and made her way on the steep staircase.

The rooftop view of the restaurant is breath catching. It overlooks Lahore’s Badshahi Mosque, which is all lit up with glowing lights. She had come to the same café two years ago for the first time, ironically with him. She was still trying to cope with the memories of that night when she saw him again, same place, even the same date; the difference was that two years had elapsed. Laughable. The coincidence was ironic and even funny at some level.

But right then, nothing seemed amusing. From the corner of her eye she saw him, sitting on a table with his family. His back was towards her so she knew he still hadn’t spotted her. She joined her own family at the front of the rooftop, which was full of people dining out. The air was freezing cold but the hot coals that were provided for every table were doing a good job of keeping everyone warm and happy. The atmosphere was charged. The night was young, the stars were out, and the chill in the air was intoxicating. Piping hot naans were being eaten, accompanied by cold Coca Cola.

She knew the exact moment he saw her, even though she did not meet his eyes. She had been laughing at something her brother had said, when, from the corner of her eye, she saw him turnand look her way. He kept looking. She turned her head, their eyes might have met for half a second, but it was too dark to tell for sure. He saw her, recognized her – and turned away. She held back sudden tears that had unexpectedly welled in her eyes. “How’s it gonna be when you don’t know me anymore?”

She spent a few minutes on the roof, trying not to stare at him, trying to pretend to be happy and in a cheerful mood, oohing and aahing over the view which was mysteriously swimming before her eyes.

She wanted to look at him one last time. He was looking at her. Their eyes locked briefly before both looked away.

It seemed that he had made up his mind not to recognize her. It’s going to be heart wrenching and painful for her. It’s going to be difficult to look at him and see not a flicker of recognition in his eyes, no effort to acknowledge the past relationship. Not being able to hear the sound of his once so familiar voice.

She felt pained. And relieved.