South Asians in the USA

Living in the USA is a unique experience. No country in the world offers better opportunities to succeed in any field of human endeavor than this country.
Last century saw the rise of America as the most powerful country. The highway system and available open spaces provide an unmatched sense of freedom. In USA, trees are found everywhere and dot the landscape. The roads, highways are lined with trees on both sides.

I get up early in the morning when the sun is already shining. It’s a bright sunny day in May. My next door neighbor is ready to go to work and we exchange greetings whenever we see each other. Driving slowly out of the residential area, I am on the main road within a few minutes. There is no public transportation in sight. Everyone is driving a car. Most of the cars have a single occupant. The big sport utility vehicle is now king of the road. This reflects the attitude of the people towards energy conservation in this great land of opportunity.

At work, I get along very well with everyone. The working relationship is great. Due to mass migration, there are a number of immigrants working in all areas. The definition of American white has expanded to include a variety of people. The people from South America also consider themselves as white although with less pretensions as compared to people of Anglo- Saxon descent. The Hispanics look very much like South Asians in appearance and habits. I have not yet developed personal friendship with any of my American neighbors. The reason is not that Americans shun South Asians. In fact, Pakistanis and Indians like to congregate and associate within their own small groups. The South Asians tend to gravitate towards their own ethnic groups. These groups include Punjabis, Urdu/Hindi speaking, Gujratis, Tamils and Pathans etc. Somehow, the affluence and poverty do not discriminate. The rich people meet rich people from any region or religion. Similarly, at the lower rung of the scale, the poor do not have any choice. All prejudices infest the middle class in South Asian Americans.

My neighbors on the street have changed over the years. The average stay of American family in a house is about five years. It is hard to place all Americans in a single category. A large number of Americans are religious and believe in a close-knit family. One of our neighbors is a Mormon family from Utah. Their kids go to church on a regular basis and stay away from drugs. By and large such families are becoming a minority. Americans do not develop any emotional ties to a house or people. For them, it is very easy to pack up and leave without looking back. In a new place, American families get connected quickly in school, church and other civic organizations.
The South Asians tend to develop relationships and associations over a period of time. It is very difficult for them to cultivate new friendships in areas where the basic social institutions do not exist. The Muslims were the first immigrant community to build Islamic centers with Sunday schools.

Indians have been very active in business ventures. They opened grocery stores and restaurants. The Indian community is looking outwards. By this I mean, the Indian community is politically more active and keen to intermix with the local population. Next come the Pakistani Americans . Generally, Indians and Pakistanis enjoy good relations in the USA. A significant number of people from Afghanistan have also migrated. The people from Afghanistan keep to themselves. The Pakistani Americans socialize within small groups. Some people are very religious and no one can detect any trace of change in their behavior or outlook. On the other hand there are South Asians who have full bars in their homes and enjoy drinking and dancing. In between these two extremes there is a large group in the middle. This group tries to retain eastern values while adjusting to local conditions.

Every immigrant community in the USA has developed its own characteristics. South Asians in New York are quite different as compared to their countrymen in other areas. For example, there are chapters of Pakistan Peoples Party, Muslim League, Indian Congress and Bhartia Janata Party in New York. Nothing like that exists in small towns. This largely depends upon the first immigrants that settled in a particular area. The South Asians immigrants in Washington DC area are on a completely different track. Existence of embassies, World Bank and other organizations has attracted people associated with these institutions. Similarly, in small towns where the population is low, South Asians have developed relations with local American people. In all big cities of the USA such as Chicago, Houston, Los Angles and New York there is no need to meet or socialize with local Americans. In certain areas of New York, even knowledge of English language is not required. The ethnic businesses conduct their daily transactions in subcontinent languages. Everything from India and Pakistani such as clothing, groceries, TV plays, films, books, music, magazines and newspapers are easily available.

The long- term impact of such an inward looking culture is not perceptible. It is absolutely necessary to learn English to survive in mainstream of America. The people who are not educated become a permanent underclass in this society. The phenomenon is apparent in certain enclaves in all major US cities. This is a human nature and all other immigrant communities have started in this fashion. Even now, every major city has a China Town. In a China Town, everything from China is available. Gradually the second generation of Chinese immigrants has moved on to suburban areas. This trend may also be applicable to the South Asian population.

The USA is a very dynamic country. The people here are always on the move. This impacts the lives of the old and the aged.. The problem has started to manifest in Indian and Pakistani communities. I personally know a number of people who have their children scattered across the length and breadth of America. A son lives on the West Coast while the daughter is married someone in the Mid West. In old age, these people need care and company. The South Asians have always ridiculed old age homes claiming a superior heritage. Now some of them have started to realize that they are in no way different from other Americans.

In fact, Pakistanis and Indians are in the worst situation. They are getting old in a culture that is different and there are no institutions where they could get any company. Americans have a number of organizations where retired people can go and spend time together. There are a number of organizations for war veterans and churches where Americans get together and enjoy free time. On the contrary, retired South Asians wait for a son or a daughter-in-law to come home from work. These young people are caught up in work and a career spiral and do not have enough time for their parents.

The Islamic centers and mosques were supposed to provide such a forum for Muslims. So far these expectations remain misplaced and unrealized. Mosques in the USA are not located in every neighborhood. Some people live close to these centers while the majority lives miles away. The Islamic centers somehow do not encourage social interaction. Generally, leaders of these centers discourage people to socialize and preach silence and prayers. But the South Asian people somehow love to talk. So far, there is no place, where the people could come, talk, play, read, listen to music and watch movies. Perhaps all of these are not considered as good activities from a religious standpoint. However, such activities play an important role in bringing the people together. People can learn about other people and help fellow Pakistanis. Due to absence of such forums, nobody knows when old people become sick. The puritanical religious values, although not against serving fellow human beings, somehow do not help.

At this time, knowledge has expanded and the problems have become very complex. Every aspect of life requires a focused attention. The dimensions of human problems for South Asians are same as for average American.

However, the solutions must be tailored to South Asian people. The main challenges facing South Asians in America are:
- Caring for old South Asians
- Education and development of young children
- Drug and substance abuse
- Marriage arrangements for kids
- Marital problems and spouse abuse
- Lack of facilities for social and cultural interaction
- Preservation of family values

Caring for old parents has started to emerge as an obligation in the first generation of South Asians. A large segment of population is oblivious to the fact that it is here to stay and retire in the USA. This number will expand as the first generation starts to retire in the USA. Unlike early European immigrants the option of settling back in India and Pakistan is not very attractive. Some people who have tried to retire in India and Pakistan have came back with horror stories. Once a person gets used to American life, it is very difficult to go back to any Third World country.

A suitable match for the kids is an issue that is very well recognized. Some progress has been made on this front. The people from Pakistan and India do not object if their boys marry white girls. The problem starts when girls marry American boys. This is particularly tough for Muslim parents because of religious injunctions. The South Asian community groups react in various ways to such marriages. This will continue to attract attention in the foreseeable future. Every community needs to form social organizations to combat this problem.

Drug abuse among teenagers of South Asian background has been gradually increasing. This has occurred due to economic pressures. It is a difficult problem when both husband and wife are working. The parents in two-income families do not have enough time for their children and close relatives are not available for help. In low-income housing areas, the kids pick up this habit from other teenagers in their neighborhood and schools. The rich South Asians who do not care much about providing religious education to their children are also impacted by the drug abuse problem.

Nothing exists so far for resolving marital problems. Divorce is becoming common among the second generation of South Asians. In their native country, friends, relatives, and parents provide the advise and service without any cost. But in the USA, there is hardly anyone who can intervene. The American divorce lawyers love spouse conflicts of all kinds. The community leaders have to think and find a solution to this serious problem, otherwise divorce statistics in the South Asian community will not be different from the average American norms.

The facilities for social and cultural interaction are lacking everywhere although a large number of organizations do exist in all urban areas of the USA. These organizations do not have facilities on the ground. A number of Pakistani and Indian American associations exist in North America. These organizations arrange musical and cultural programs. In my opinion, this is a passing phase that will end after some time, the reason being lack of learning of native languages. Most of these activities are catered to the older generation that can understand and appreciate the nuances of music, poetry and culture. The younger generation is not learning the languages of their parents. The percentage of young people learning native languages is very small among second generation South Asians. There is no doubt in my mind that these organizations will decline as the older generation is replaced. In order to provide a link to the native country, the young generation has to learn the language. The language is a gateway to culture, music and literature. All of Indo-Pak American social and cultural organizations have to make efforts in teaching the language or bid farewell to everything that they have left behind.

The South Asians have made all sacrifices for their children like their counterparts back home. So far, they have been very successful. A large number of their kids are going to colleges after high school. Some families devote great energy in imparting religious education in Sunday schools. These efforts have to be continued and enhanced. This alone can touch a large number of American families in a positive way.

Preservation of family values is a complicated issue. Back home, strong family ties are somewhat linked with nepotism. This is not a problem in North America. We have to leave certain elements of values behind while preserving others. We have to say good bye to ethnic and religious prejudices that are prevalent in South Asia and retain humanitarian aspects of family values.

All challenges listed above require institutions that can concentrate on a single issue although all are inter-related. I believe some people have made good beginnings in South Asian communities. The dimensions are such that a volunteer or a professional organization in the USA can only take note of one particular problem. For example, drug and substance abuse require experienced counselors and application of all modern techniques for rehabilitation. Similarly, caring for old relatives will require people who have a personal interest in addressing the issue.

The South Asians have to develop volunteer organizations in all communities across America to help their own people. These volunteer organizations should have a specific goal in mind. So far we have relied on a single organization such as mosques, temples, gurudawaras to cater to all kinds of human needs. However, it is obvious that religious organizations cannot provide social, cultural and career counseling needs. Life is so busy that after offering prayers, people dash quickly to their work. A few people who are dedicated stay behind. Some religious people are so dedicated that it is very difficult to discuss any worldly problem with them. Their answer to all problems is more prayers.

The European culture dominates the American landscape. The ideas of individual freedom, human equality, liberty and pursuit of happiness continue to reverberate here. The legacy left by early European settlers is very pronounced. The emphasis on individual achievement is very high. This has certainly introduced a measure of selfishness in the attitude of people. I have seen people who are homeless whereas their relatives live in comfortable houses. The American people are very candid about it. They accept the fact that when their children were growing up, they did not make necessary sacrifices.

Now there is the Internet. This is great hope for the new generation. I believe that this will emerge as a communication tool for the retired people as well. It will serve as a bridge across the continents between people of all races. Although it is a not a substitute for a personal contact, it can bring people together. I hope that South Asian community in this great country starts thinking about building institutions where people can meet regardless of age. In America, the South Asians will need to co-operate to build such institutions. Going back to the native countries is not an option, as their children will stay here and will not nurse the same feeling for the home country.

What will be the legacy of South Asians to the North American continent? Will the moral, social and cultural refinements of the East leave a lasting impression on the American people? I believe that certain aspects of our culture and traditions will enrich the USA on a human level. We could lay the foundations of caring and concern for fellow human beings. First and foremost, the South Asians here still respect the elders in their family. The average American has no use for the wisdom of old age. The young people here believe that old people are obsolete and they should be tucked away somewhere out of sight in nursing homes. In South Asia, aged parents and even distant relatives, are respected, accommodated, and provided space. People can be seen living in very small houses with orphaned children and older relatives. Although, it is not a perfect setting, it is much more humane as compared to the lonely existence in old-age homes.

Another aspect of South Asian culture is a strong family. The strong family ties do not emerge in a vacuum. The South Asians have a tradition of sharing and caring. Instead of following the generic values of individualism, the sharing of success, happiness and sorrow can be shown as an example by our community. This will be an enduring legacy that South Asians could leave behind not only for their own children but also for the Americans.