in waking moments

11:12 pm

back to these words i return
empty and devoid of meaning
trying to pen something that would say
trying to find the words that would last

nothing but lines on a page
nothing but dots on a screen
the turmoil does not settle
inside the storm rages on

these waking moments
on the edge of reason i walk
on the brink or reality
these passing moments

im trying to say that which i have no words for
im trying to place that which i cant find
questions asked of me for which answer are not know
questions asked of me that i created
fly in your holding pattern around my universe
there is no where to land

the walls are coming up again
losing myself again in these waking moments
losing myself in sleep again
running but not going anywhere
watching myself getting burried again

clawed from the dakness and despair only to return

"what we wrong...
walking tightrope high over moral ground
seeking visions of, falling up somehow
do come down.."

the high has left and the void i dont know how to fill
needing to feel something...needing to feel something
needing to feel something...needing to feel something
but there is nothing
there is no high
there is no low
there is nothing
i am in the nothing

no words
no songs
no sights
no hands
no eyes
no thoughts
no memories
where are my moments
where are my moments
where are my moments

excess is when i felt alive....
just enough was a little more

these waking moments trapped on the edge of reason
these waking moments stolen back from the dark
when i feel alive
when i feel real
when i feel....anything...

drifting between the world of dream and reality i get lost
my dreams making the world that i live in
confused i cant tell them apart anymore
confused i cant understand them anymore
my mind closed...my heart hidden again
my soul drifting...wandering...

keep close is what i ask of you,
keep close is what i beg to say,
dont go away like so many have before,
dont go away like so many i pushed before,

as the dark comes again i lay still
to tired to fight
i give in
i give up

here i rest at the edge of reason....
in waking moments

moments will always be moments
but they will build to become stories
stories to remember
to laugh and smile at somewhere else
so lets start ours