Salim's Final Solution to the Mirzaee Problem

No, scout, we don't need your vaporous assistance. The solution I have to offer has nothing to do with gas, shooting, or holocausting down the abyss.

I propose a simple EITHER OR solution:

The Mirzaees openly declare that, as required by Islam, they believe that the Holy Prophet Mohammed (PBUH) was the Last and Final Messenger of God and that there have been, are not, and will never be another messenger after him. With this, the Mirzaees can appoint their leader, name them anything except nabi, rasool, paighambar and thus be accepted as bona fide Muslims by Pakistan, Pakistanis, and the rest of the Muslim world.

OR

The Mirzaees openly declare that they believe in Mirza Ghulam Ahmed as their messenger of God and that the Holy Prophet Mohammed (PBUH) was NOT the last and final Messenger. With this, the Mirzaees should agree not to portray themselves as Muslims (brand protection) and be allowed to practice their religion without any hindrance, discrimination, or fear.