Harf e Aakhir Kisi Laparwah Ke Naam

Dil ka koi hissa tumse sakht naraz hai. Aankhon pe aansoyon ki chubhan mehsoos ho rahe hai mager dil tumharee laparwahee ki wajah se humain rone ki ijazat nahin dai raha. Udasi aisi ghazab ki hai ke ager haal e dil khol dain to dost aur dushman sab pursa daine aa pohnchain. Mager kis haq se pursa lun us rafakat ke ikhtataam ka jo shayad dil ki kirchiyon mein mil gaye. Bicharne ki koi wajeh to honi chahiye na. Koi baat, koi bahana. Fakt khamoshi aur laparwahi umer bhar ke ehsaas e zayan ko thapakne ke liye kaafi nahin. Abhi dil ki baat kalam ki zabani kehi bhi nahin aur chehrey pe garam aansoyon ki dhar jaari ho gaye. Kash koi tumhara dil bhi aisey hi dukhai jaisey tum ne mera dukhaya hai. Kash tumhain lamhe sadyon ki tarha lagain jab koi tumhara dil torr ke apni rah ko chal de. Duur bohot duur tak tum ussey jaatey huay dekhoy aur woh eik bar bhi mutazalzal na ho aur palat ke na dekhay. Kash! Mager yeh baat mein ne inteha e dard mein keh di warna dil abhi bhi tumhara hamdard o razdaan hai aur tumhara dard gawara nahin kar sakey ga.


Mein nahin janti keh tum meray barey mein kya sochtey ho. Mein ne apni sadgi mein dil ki kitni batein bataye hain tumhain. Guzray lamhon ke kitne aurak tumharey samney khol diye. Meri aankhon mein jo eitebaar ka rang hai woh chamak mujhe tumharee aankhon mein kyun dekhaii nahin daiti. Jitni batein mein ne tum se kahein, us mein tumhari yadon ka shumaar kyun nahin? Mein ne kabhi
tumhari khamiyan nahin tatoleen mager jab bhi hum mil ke baithey tum ne mujh mein koi burai ya kami ki nishandehi ki. Aaj mein soch rahe hun ke shayad kasur mera hai. Mohabbatoun mein bhi hisaab karna chahiye. Jab koi meri parwah aur pyar ki kader nahin karta tha to mujhe bhi apne lehje ki sheereeni ko badal daina chahiye tha. Kuch wadey mujhe bhi torne chahiye thai. Yeh rasm e wafa to kaatil ho gaye apni. Ager mein ne bhi laparwahi ko apni aadat mein shamil kar liya hota to shayad aaj itni takleef nahin ho rahe hoti. Mager kya karun, keh bewafai aur sitam zareefi meray khameer mein samatey hi nahin? Mein ne lakh chaha keh ab bhi tum se aur tumharee yadon se nafrat kar sakon mager dil is kader pukhta hai apni ulfat mein ke yeh pighal kar dard ban jaata hai aur tumhari khamiyon ke sadke namukhtatam moti aansoyon ki soorat baha daita hai. Batao is kam fehm ko keh yeh tarz e mohabbat issey jeene nahin dai ga. Mehboob aur mabood ka fark issey kab samajh mein aye ga? Mabood woh jo humarey sarkashi ke bawajood hum se pyar karey aur mehboob woh jo humari lakh manajaat ke baad bhi hum pe mehrbaan na ho.


Jahan tum se itne shikwey gilay hain mujhe, wahan meri zaat ka eik ansar sogwar hai un lamhon ke hijer mein jahan mein ne khud se mulakaat ki. Kabhi guftagoo ke lamhon mein akal shashdar reh jaati keh yeh soch ke naye naye dareechey kahan se khul jaatey hain tumharey kurb mein. Din ghanton ki tarha aur ghantey lamhon ki tarha guzartey thai jab hum dunya se mavra eik doosrey mein gum hotey thai. Kisi ko kya samjhaoun is rishtey ki pakeezgi aur sadgi. Lams se bekhaber faqt lafzon se bandhey natey ko koi kya samjhey ga. Hum ne eik saath kitne khayal, jazbey aur khwab bantey hain. Ab unko rakm karne ke liye mujhe koi lafzon ka khazeena bhi dai jao. Dil iss kader natawaan hai shiddat e ghum mein ke yeh un yadon ko tatolne ke kabil nahin. Lekin mein janti hun ke jazbey waqt ki nazer ho gaye to inke rang pheekey par jain gay, aur barson baad jab dil tumharey naam ka koi naksh dhoondhey ga to meray deewan mein bikhree nakis rawayaat se bohot bezaar ho ga.


Mein janti hun ke ager yeh mukalma humarey darmian hua to tum meri jazbateeyat aur nadani ki sarzanish karo gay aur koi bedard si baat keh ke humeesha ki tarha chal do gay. Mein tumhari anaparasti se bhi wakif hun aur bedardi se bhi. Jis shaks ko meri sadaloh mohabbat dekhai nahin di, woh kya samjhey ga jazbon aur rishton ke paich o khum ko. Jissey meri zaat ka husn zair nahin kar paaya ussey meri rooh ki khoobsorti se kya haasil. Ager kisi ko dosh daina lazim hai to phir iss kasoor mein mein aur mera khuda baraber ke shareek hain. Mein jo tamam tar mushkilon aur takleefon ke bawajood rah e wafa pe gamzan hun aur mera khuda, jis ne meray khameer mein itna ishq, wafa aur dard bhar diya keh khudgharzi ke liye jagah nahin rahe. Rahe tum, to tumhari laparwahi ke liye harf e aakhir yehi hai keh ab mujh mein tum se pyar karne ki sakat nahin rahe. Tum ne meray tamaam jazboun ko unki hadd e bardasht tak aazma liya hai. Abhi mein ne apni zaat ke kitne nayaab khazeeney bacha rakhey thai jo umer bhar ka rakht e safar thai. Zeest ke har mor ke liye kuch batein, kuch lamhe aur kuch jazbey rakh choray thai jo ahista ahista tumhari nazer karne thai. Mager palat kar na dekhne waley ko koi kis naam se pukarey? Jaaney walon ke intezaar mein koi kab tak dar o deewar ke sang muntazir rahe? Kisi bekader ko koi jins e mohabbat ka mol kya bataye? Ab in tamaam batoun ka ehsaas e zayan tumhe zindagi dai gi, jab rafakatoun ke hajoom mein tum mujh jaisey ulfat ki talash karo gay aur jano gay keh mujh jaisey log kis kader nayab hain. Aaj mein ne bicherney ka faisla kar liya aur apne tamaam wadon ki tarha mein yeh wada bhi zindagi ki aakhri sans tak nibhaoun gi.