bhopali

have now shifted to bhopal, state capital of madhya pradesh. bag, baggage, dream, whims et all...

hope to do some good work here. hope to take off from ten years ago from where i stopped taking risks and chasing dreams. dont know where i got the courage from. but i have done it finally. after years of threatening to 'go away', i have finally gone away. from everyone i like, everything that i like, to a new place, to new people.

no, am not afraid.

just waiting to watch what happens next.

mostly, only the things that i plan well will happen here. bhopal is too slow for anything to happen on its own!

not saying big things. but yes, this feels like an achievement. as planned, in my 36th year, am out of stagnancy into a room of my own, and that too with a view...

a wide one...

wish me luck.

i need it from all quarters of the world, from every corner of the universe. this once i dont want to be proved wrong. its high time some decision paid off without making me feel sorry.

there are other things on my mind too...

like chechi. like dharani. like the main, asha group... my girls, my other kids... my acha. my bithetan... cant seem to stop feeling terrified at times when i think that i am on my own.

why did i do this?

because, let me tell myself...

if one has to grow, risks have to be taken...
there is no shortcut to that. i know that.

let me see. no, not just see. let me do something here. chase my dreams for a while, turn into a responsible person and contribute something worthwhile in my own life and that of the people i love.

also, miss anju. but i know that this is high time now. a moment more in the earlier position and i would have grown roots on my bum! too much of sitting and pondering and doing desk types jobs. too much of wishing this had happened and that had happened.

now, am on my own.

so, either i learn to swim and save myself.

or i drown.

but who has the time to die?

there is work to be done!