why we are quick to hate (or pick fights) - a question to all Chowkies

an interesting ilog by Atif2 - its idea must be counted as one of the reason in this list. Here is the link:
my advice to all single men - get yourself a girl by ATIF2

leenah, another good observation - the need for venting frustation safely. Thanks for your thoughts.

I agree with csg that in its entirety, the cyber world, with all its pros and cons, remains a source of refuge (or break) from the real world. The duration and numbers of one's stay may vary. Some people may need a dose of thrice per day day, and others get addicted to once every hour; hence "this forum BECOMES the existence". Consequently, they need a source to vent the frustrations of their daily lives on these online forms so as to have minimal damage to their real lives. In addition, there could be people for whom the real world might be full of rejection, and the only acceptance of intellectual usefulness/superiority they receive, comes through such media.

In any case, the outcome is sad.

And yes, just as delirium pointed out, there is no point in 'discussing' when your participation is merely required for a headless nod.

csg, I like your perceptive observation "The net should be an addition to an existence" and not an 'existence' itself. In fact, there is burgeoning research on the psychological disorders happening due to excessive on-line living. It is obvious that, if not handled with caution, how it can be hazardous to one’s psychological and even physical health. It can really suck one into its 'black hole: the cyberspace.

Thanks for your encouraging words about poetry. Here is a line from Pablo Neruda about pain (and thrill) of poetry ".... there’s a banging of objects that call without being answered, and a restless motion, and a muddled name."

I agree with what both of you said, but I believe another reason is an excess of online living. The net should be an addition to an existence, ideally. However, in all these love fests (for the lack of a better word :) ) this forum BECOMES the existence. In a civilized society, freedom of speech comes with a responsibility or there is a word called libel. Unfortunately it doesn't exist here, where people are rather expected to behave like adults and according to an honor code.

Anyways, keep up your poetry quin. As I said, it's a break and a relief. I can forget the most bitter debates of my life with pablo neruda in my hand.

Delirium, your last line is an interesting and valid point. However, it is also important to care for ourselves (protect ourselves from the psychological impact of participation). If anything you say is responded not with reason but with irrational frenzy, you may feel your energy depleting by such exchange (It is then no more debate or dialogue - it is a bitter exchange, to say the least). In that case, would withdrawing from these useless brawls be not a better choice? Why to get wounded for nothing. On the other hand, of course, if it is a genuine debate or discussion, carried with respect for opposing point of view, who would want to stop contributing?

Regarding your second para, I think you have aptly identified one other major reason: ASD (Attention Seeking Disorder). This malaise is also at the root cause of not problems at Chowk, which is just microcosm of our society at large, but in all the world affairs. The world God gave us to celebrate has been bled like hell because of this tumour in the brain of a few.

As always, thanks for participating ...

Guess you have hit the nail on the head. Egocentric is the word and the prime if not sole reason! Affording just a bit of space to opposing point of views should ward off many ugly encounters.

It may well be attention grabbing! Creating or jumping into a fray or controversy just to be centre of attention ?

Avoiding debate or a situation is the way out? Does that amount to breeding negativity :) ?