Bazm e Tanhai

Aaj jee mein aata hai keh humain tanhai ke kisi lamhe mein yeh sochna ho ga keh hum chahtey kya hain. Naimatein aur nawazishain kon si duayon ki tabeer hain aur hum kis kis naimat ka shukr ada kar rahe hain. Kuch batein karni hain aaj khud sey aur apne khuda sey. Meray kamrey ke sulaghtey alao ke pass khamoshi sey, dheemi roshni mein baithna, aisa hai jaisey apney dil ka koi wajood ban gaya aur hum uske pass aa baithey. Shayed sard shamon ki gehri
udasi mein hum apne aap sey batein karney ke aadi hain. So leejiay jab andar aur bahir ka ghubaar eik sa ho gaya to hum aa baithey apney kareeb keh kuch lamhe gham e doran sey chura kar gham e hasti ko daitey hain. Aaj seeney mein itna dard hai keh sans aana dushwar lagta hai, magar hum jaantey hain keh yeh humara dil kisi naye dard sey bhara nahin, balke abhi naye puraney tamaam dukh itney zayada ho gaye keh paimana apni woosat ke bawajood chalak parra. Jee mein tha keh kisi din thora waqt nikalein gay aur jee bhar ke royain gay tanhai mein. Yeh ghubaar e dard yunhi utar jaye ga aur hum mein zabt phir namukhtatim ho jaaye ga. Magar gham e doraan ne woh chand kamzor lamhe nahin diye humain. Hum apney pyaron ke samney do char aanso to behney daitey hain, magar in qatron sey woh sailaab thamta nahin jo hum seeney mein chupai rakhtey hain. To aaj jab hum sey zabt nahin ho raha to kuch ghubaar sukhan ki nazar kar rahe hain, keh zara fursat miley to phir baaki jee halka kar lain gay. such poochain to hansney hasaney ko chahey lakhon dost hon, sath baith ker roney aur aansoo ponchney waley dost dhoondhey sey nahin miltey. Aur hum bhi itney khud sar aur ana parast hain ke chehrey pe aisi muskurahat sajaye phirtey hain keh kisi key wahm o guman mein na aaye ke hum tanha aur udas hain. Hai na sad’aa ki sadgi. magar humari sadgi humari katil nikli.

Yeh aag ki tapish bhi ageeb sheh hai keh kisi mehrbaan dost ki tarha rag e jaan mein uter jaati hai. Khamoshi, tareeki aur tanhai mein ajeeb sa sakoon milta hai. Hum apne chehrey ke khad o khal ko gudaz honey ki ijazat daitey hain aur palkon par na jaaney kitne moti chamakne lagtey hain. Na apnon ka bharam aur na ghairon ka lihaz rehta hai keh aansoo chupain ya ponchain. Bas behney daitey hain keh jahan jon si boond girey waheen naksh ho yeh dil ki hakayat. Ab batein hon gi apnon sey, doston sey aur eik mehram e dil sey. Woh sab kuch kahein gay hum, jo labon par mamnuuh tha. Apne kanon sey sunain gay woh raaz jo dil ne sargoshi mein bhi nahin kahey. Kuch shikwey hain jo humaree murawwat ko gawara nahin keh labon tak aa jain, kuch khwab hain jo humaree akal ke pehrey mein sans laitey hain aur kuch khauf hain jinhain hum tatoltey nahin. Aaj yeh sab humarey sath iss khas bazm mein shareek hon gay. Jee chahta hai keh kisi din, meri zaat sey bahir koi paiker iss mehfil mein baithey aur hum apnee zabaan ko bebak payain, lekin shayad yeh eik aur hasrat humarey sath humaree kabr mein utrey gi. Wahan bhi koi hum sey kuch kahey sunai ga ya nahin, keh nahin saktey. Ab yeh aankhain tab hi khulain gi jab yeh aankhain band hon gi. Humain to issi tanhai mein mehfil karni hai, yahan bhi aur wahan bhi. Humarey dost ehbaab naraaz ho jain gay humaree batoun sey, magar kya karein keh abhi zaat ke kuch samunder aabgeenon sey labraiz hain magar wahan koi ghota zan nahin hota. Kya karein keh rooh ka koi eik hissa abhi bhi manoos nahin auron sey. Kya yeh uzar kaafi hai keh humain rafeekon ki kadr bohot hai magar yunhi abhi hum apni tanhaiyon mein ghiray hain aur dil ke kisi eik hissey ke liye izhaar ki soorat talash kar rahe hain.

Palkon ko bheegney ki ijazat kya di, jaaney kahan sey yeh toofaan aa gaya. Naee puraney tamaam gham, jinhain hum shayad bhool bhi chukey thai yad aa gaye. Har qatra koi baat koi lamha sambhaley dil ki dehleez pe aaya aur humain dilasa daita hua beh gaya. Hum ne sab ko barrey pyar sey rukhsat kiya. Yehi to gham gusaar hain apney jo hum sey sawal nahin poochtey, bas tasalli daitey hain humain. Aisey kamzor lamhon mein dil dua kiya karta hai keh kash koi hota jis ke kandhon pe yeh ghubaar nikalta aur woh humain pyar sey, mazbooti sey galey laga kar thamey rakhta. Jab tak jee chahta hum uske seeney pe sarr rakkhey rotay rehtey aur woh shiddat e gham mein apni kurbat ke ehsas sey humain sakoon daita. Magar aisa koi mehrbaan humaree faseelon ke andar nhin aata aur hum apni zaat ke kafas mein akailey tanha reh jatey hain. Yeh bazm e tanhai jab bikharti hai to hum asoodgi paatey hain magar sath mein kisi zaat ki kammi humain aur gudaz chor jaati hai.