it’s the love that counts

mother
what’s the harm
in loving her today
a little more
despite hallmark’s
efforts to seize (the day)
here is to Moms here and there*

*my mom, God-bless is no longer here

***
forgettable
fainting words
frosty look
freezing touch
frigid love
frore death

unforgettable
fluid smile
fervent laughter
fervid friendship
flashing time

***
the cycle
river-ocean
ocean-river
both incomplete
without drops
carried by the
lazy cloud

the fissure asked
why
is it so
difficult
to converse
forthrightly

(the) parachute
smiled back

***

tum nahiN
neend nahiN
kya pyar
isi kO
kehtay haiN

***
yaad t’ri kis goshay maiN rehti hay
gar ooska pata chal bhee ja’aye
tO kya mitaee ja sakhti hay?

***
understanding
we were young, the night old
donning coats and gloves
as we left she told me
’i do not understand
things some people say’

with mind elsewhere, said i
’sub theek hay, sub theek hay
her baat aakhir kahaaN
samajhnay samjahanay
ki hoti hay bhala’

***

ghulami
waq’t ki lehrouN ka toh’faa
ghung’roo hO ya mangal sut’r
zanjeeraiN haiN donouN hee
ik azli ghulami ki

slavery
gift from the waves of Time
ghungroo or mangal sut’r
living symbols are they both
of eternal slavery.

***

ataullah & company
I
a battered truck pulled in the lot
the faded sign on its side door
read ataullah & company
an old man, face taut, weather beaten
emerged from the truck and sat
at the far end of the thatched roofed stop
intently he gazed at the dottle
then tapped it on the clay ashtray
once, twice, thrice……till the dottle fell in
restocked the bowl with tobacco
retrieved from a lined leather pouch
tapped it down with his fore finger
satisfied he smiled and lit a match
puffed on it quickly while the lit match
circled the pipe’s rim clockwise*
at the other end of this stop
hamid sipped his second cerveza
wahid toyed with his remaining lunch
and i gently nursed the cohiba
as the cars and and trucks whizzed by
and the crows debated jinnah
or gandhi or lahore or delhi
i couldn’t care less and shooed them away
the old man, pipe now freshened up
mistook my shooing for a wave
came over and pulled himself a chair
i offered a shake ’…ataullah?’
’no,’ he smiled and said ’i am satan’
’where are your horns?’ quizzed hamid
satan’s wrinkled face a weather map
of high and low pressure build ups
lines scurrying, dipping and curving
as he smiled the wrinkles formed crescents
how can this man be satan thought i
looks can be deceptive said his eyes
’if you really are satan
why are you not leading us stray?’
asked hamid, not one to hold his peace
’nah,’ the old man said as he inhaled
’no need to, my work is done here.’

II
the sun was up and we were in no rush
the old man sensed our eagerness
puffed on his pipe and continued
’aye i knew him when he traversed
the sands that hid the wealth beneath
measured his steps, words, actions
voice of Allah named him his followers
i who served Him since eternity
bid my time to checkmate him
his followers with conviction
spread his influence east and west
soon they ran out of zeal and vigour
they forgot how patient i could be
i rest, waiver nor falter ever
nothing is oblivious to me
sunnis, shiites, sufis all whimper
slaves they are of a mecca
that i created in their minds
i swear by my Allah who favoured
clay over light, me over you
even Muhammed will disown you
there is nothing more for me to do.’

at the Ka’aba pilgrims are required to circle anti-clockwise

***

understanding
we were young, the night old
donning coats and gloves
as we left she told me
’i do not understand
things some people say’

with mind elsewhere, said i
’sub theek hay, sub theek hay
her baat aakhir kahaaN
samajhnay samjahanay
ki hoti hay bhala’

***
cayenne:

since you are new around here let me just remind you of something that you may not know about some of us:

in addition to this: I am against the loss of a single life be it at the hands of an individual, institution or state that you have very conveninetly overlooked because it may not sit well with your personal ambitions, agenda or world-view... i have been continuously (and for some friends irritatingly) harping on occupying army in pakistan...nothing would improve in pakistan till the occupying army is housed in its proper place...

now, let me explain nothing

pakistan has a myriad of problems...chief among them the following:

* lack of strong, functioning and trustworthy institutions (that india has been developing since 1947)
* distrust and intolerance of government, institutions, individuals
* absence of accountability, goodwill and tolerance
* runaway population, lack of services/facilities for the ordinary citizens

some of the above are inter-dependent and overlapping...but you get the picture?...unless pakistan has at the least an independent judiciary, legislature and civil services (police and other law enforecement agencies):

* no religious minority or sect would feel safe in pakistan
* women would continue to be treated as chattels
* absence of timely and fair legal remeides will lead to violations of law
* civil society will continue its erosion
* rule of jungle will hold sway

hence my seemingly incessant hammerings at the occupying army...it must go...it must go!...

-only then can pakistanis really hope to embark on the long and arduous rebuilding process
-only then can intolerance be replaced by accomodation
-only then can a ray of hope can shine
-only then can national institutions reaffirm and offer hope for the minorities, the downtrodden, the disenfranchised, the women
-only then can (we) pakistanis begin to crawl back and be a good neighbour, a good corporate and world citizen

hope you and others now understand the perpetuating harms of the occupying army

***

another post on the zehra pill piece:

i forget who mentioned here that when their daughter is a certain age they would return back…khair ..here is my take:

two/three years back…i had a informal seminar-interview session with the students of Islamic Studies Dept at KU…(that’s another story)…and another one at an ’art’ school in defence…students were 16-22 years of both sexes…the format in both places was similar…i would ask questions, they would identify themselves and answer my question…

at this art school…every question i asked the students the principal sahib would answer instead…and in one of his responses he drew a line…’us vs. them’…he opined that here in the west the students were immoral, used drugs...etc…at some point i pointedly asked him to shut up and let the students answer me questions…and in response to principal saheb’s tirade i asked the students if they were aware of what goes on in the west …yes in a chorus they replied…

then after more prodding one student said…’Sir, everything that goes on there goes on here.’ … the principal saheb’s jaw dropped……"our parent’s do not know most of it…let me give you an innocent example… if there is a jam session here…all of us would attend...but nobody would mention it is jam session or a dance session…we would just say there is a lecture at the school…’

recall what I wrote about elaichi in an earlier post?

sex, drugs, immorality is as much prevalent in today’s kids there as here…with one stark difference…over here there are well publicized programs by the school boards and cities and municipalities and tv channels promoting drug awareness, drug abuse, unwanted pregnancies etc…over there…elaichi…

***

sunday morning menmen

on zehra’s article amrita wrote about hymen-fixation...hymen, yes!...some random thoughts:

* the desi male should bean endangered species: pity unicef is so uninformed these days...maybe UN should be reformed...SC veto for north korea and sudan...anyone?

* good news: the hymen can be restored for special rites.

* bad news: medical plans do not cover this - get out your amex, mc or visa

* mixed news: according to a soon to be published article in the Scientifc Desi by none other than this yours truly there is a mental hymen in both men and women will call it menmen sorry no political correctness for now sammi and am...(yes did consider menhy but the newly democratic afghan government has already filed for patents on it so have discarded it...will check into the root for hymen and might change it later...this menmen when penetrated causes happiness, peace and bliss...that there is so much misery around indicates penetration rate of less than 1% globally...am bad with statistics so actuaries may correct me on this later...

* menmen penetration is achieved when both participants are tuned and receptive (not tunn -- ok bad desi joke)
* menmen penetration is advertent not inadvertent...mostly
* menmen penetration is an unlearned condition
* menmen penetration does not cause a population explosion
* menmen penetration happens (credit tom hanks - forrest gump)
(tbc)

***

...the kitchen is sparkling clean:)

...my significant half is away for the weekend...so i was up early after a restless troubled night...fetched the weekend paper from the door...and in a timed frenzy of multi-tasking i put the toast in the toaster, water in the kettle, whipped eggs and turned up the heat for the pan, added some salt and pepper and retrieved a cheese slice...then i started thinking about some words to compose...and then mind drifted to zehra’s pill piece...and the reaction of some desi men...and yes...was reminded of ammi saying ’beta her kaam dhiyaan say kya karo’...

...but wait!...between my description of the kitchen activities and recollection of ammi’s saying there was a cyber interruption...something spilled over and some things got burnt...because my mind was busy elsewhere...khair...pyar or the fear of the pyar is a sufficiently strong motivation or deterrent (shrug)...in that i forgot the verse and starting cleaning up after the er...happenstance...we do not want to leave any evidence for the mistress of the kitchen...she can be very unkind sometimes:)...

...so friends, i did feed myself and left the kitchen sparkling clean in the aftermath:)

...(sigh) ..chalo aaj ka din aur shub bhee guzar ja’aye gi

***

zeh’r:

general comment on Parents & The Pill

...yara the whole desi perspective on sex stinks...on sex? it stinks on just about everything;)...we know that...but do not admit it...storks still carry babies down...bhagwan ki kirpa say, Allah kay ehsaan say bachchay paida hojatay haiN!...sex education is a taboo subject...sometimes i think we are slow...and dichotomy starts right from the home...hiding behind faux-talk of morality and culture ( and i am not even bringing religion here)...khandaan and upbringing....we bury our heads in the sand...and just in case some nut-case mulla gets uptight with this...let me add explicitly...am not talking about sex, pill or condom usage only...

...the younger generation for ever pushes the envelope...in another era they used to smoke and return home after freshening up with elaaichi (cardomom) or paan thinking their elders would not suspect that they have been smoking...it is a game...each generation knows what the other is up to...that they chose to turn their head and hide themselves away from the truth is their fault or mechanism to deal with it...take your pick

...replace elaaichi with pill or condom...

...and yet there are holy desis who make fun of the writer (zehra)...one even taunted her to be more explicit...another publicly proclaimed her celibacy...sad...am sad for their comprehension skills and for their pathetic life they lead...for the vicarious pleasure they seek....she has said what she wants to...it is they who take vicarious and perverse delight rather than seek or discuss the truth!

...certain ...no make it most segments of pakistani society are sick indeed...mullahs routinely abuse their young wards...nobody makes an issue of it in any concerted way...(instead they do not shy away from hurling qur’an ayahs and hadiths as if they were cluster bombs to annihilate the skeptics) no wonder those abused children abuse others when they grow up...

...men hold hands and walk the bazaar...married couples cannot...even within close families...couples have to sit apart...all in the name of some faux sense of propriety......in faux regression the desi would do victoria proud

...and before some mulla-wannabee accuses me of being an exhibitionist let me remind them that is not what i am writing about...i am discussing decent and forthright behaviour...by both the generations...and if it includes discussion about that aspect of life we call sex, so be it...

summing up...each generation pushes the envelope farther and farther...the older generation has the experience if not the direct knowledge of what the younger generation is up to...so kidding aside...time to get real...

and a post script to above in another post to hamidm:

hypocrisy rules

you got just about everything right...but i am p-off at not only the older generation...if you re-read i was careful in apportioning the blame between both generations...(sorry zeh’r but this is true too)...

in the desi context both generations share the blame...treading the thin line occurs in both generations...so faces are saved...barely...as my friend used to say in a different context gar tum may himmat hay tO baghawat karlo/ warna jahan maaN-baap kehtay haiN shaadi karlo...perhaps...

...just perhaps the younger generation is slightly more at fault...they want the independence and freedom and yet want to retain a fig cover...and in that they put the older generation in a bit of spot...

***

click on this link (you will have to sign in on chowk to access)… HERE

this is the stuff our infamous abdul-hate the purveyor of morality and islam aka as echoboom writes as chusni on the unplugged section of off the wall…and FYI he also interacts under some female nicks as well…

so much for his righteous indignations and call to islam me-proud-you-proud hot air…

finally a partial admission:

#95 by echoboom on April 30, 2005 7:51pm PT

Khamkhwa:94
...hUm haiN,
tumhaaray chachay,
chusni/echo boom/farangi-kush/hamzaad afaqui

now, he should come clean on the chachi nicks too