L’affaires, Americans and Desis

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Hi FV,

1. ``What really angers me are those who benefit from a fairly cheap and decent education in their country of origin and then they ‘lutao’ it all in a place where they will always be judged by the colour of their skin``

I don`t know what you are trying to achieve by this statement. Every one has absolute right to pursue its career however he/ she seem fit. Many people leave their country due to absence of hope. Saying that they can stay there and help make that country better is not true and applicable to everybody. Because not everybody is leader or not everybody wants to change society. Most of the people just want to live simple and their own life.

Re, to ``cheap education``, those people paid for that education and worked hard--real hard to get that education in cut throat competition.

2. ``At the cash counter, I was handed a fairness cream. “Gift,” I was told. With mock anger (and silly self-righteousness, I admit), I asked him, “Why are you encouraging this trend? Why does everyone have to be fair?``

You are answering your own question of ``but I do not understand why people from S. Asia go to the US and continue to live there.”...Most of the people just don’t want to live in their country......

3. As regard to Fairness cream. This phenomenon is not applicable to `desis` only...just do a little study on cosmetic market and their advertisement targeted to women (and now men) too. You probably have been to big shopping malls where you can see tons load of cosmetic promising eternal youth, ``no wrinkles`` etc...
I think there is demand for this kind of stuff that`s why this market is thriving,

4. What ``tall coffee is small one`` ...see following links:
http://itre.cis.upenn.edu/~myl/languagelog/archives/001677.html
http://www.starbucks.co.jp/en/latte_lingo.htm

God bless internet. It gives you answers quickly...

5. ``Come back home. I will get your favorite film star to sign a ‘lota’ for you. Promise.`` ..Great offer. But I am afraid you cannot do it because my favorite one Marlon Brando died...

Farzana jee,
Whu do you poke fun of desi people? Are you not a desi? Or do you consider yourself superior to them. Please do not be so angry and defensive in this festive season and lighten up. May Santa fulfill all your legal wishes.

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As to the question of why the smallest size at starbucks is called `tall.`

Because THEY CAN, that is the beauty of the U.S.

We call football soccer because WE CAN. We call football football even though the foot doens`t hit the ball because WE CAN.

``Lady, if you are so confident that he won’t be interested in her, then why ask her to leave him alone?

I truly feel sorry for these women who go around declaring they are not doormats. If you are not, then you don’t have to announce it. You ought to be so comfortable in your skin that you do not have to carry a placard. Honestly. ``


You`re right BUT what about the responsibility of the other woman to keep her interests away from a married man.

Who is going to lecture her and tell HER about self respect. Just going by statistics, married men do not leave their wives for the other woman. Women should be balanced and sensible enough to know that they need to stay away from romances with married men.

Can you blame a wife for being upset and taking it out on the other woman? I can`t.
I`m sure Victoria Beckham didn`t let her husband off easy.

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Re. the fairness cream, this is indeed a despicable part of our culture, and at least in India the ads are getting too in-your-face. But there is also awareness being generated, PILs being filed.

I was just a trifle surprised to find this cream marketed in the US at a desi store...a couple of NRIs I spoke to were not even aware of the ramifications (they thought it was just another ace application for smooth skin) and were surprised at the regressive ad blitz for those creams in India (and Pak?).

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#32 by Bina_Shah
“convince me that we haven`t lost the plot entirely.”

Sometimes it is known as MaiN kerra paasay jawaaN, manjhi kithay pawaan!

But seriously, why chowk cannot change directions? Internet has become the alternate media. Unlike the mainstream media, internet allows people to comment and speak their mind and respond to issue instantly and that to me is whole lot better than sending a letter to the editor.
There are several models on the net and the chawk management has a right to look at all of them to see what works best with their goals.

The basic ingredients of interacting sites or blogs are to create a space where some meaningful dialog can take place. There are plenty of sites on the web and I would be glad to provide links should you need them, where the Editors interact with the posters, challenge them and warn them for bad posts.

These sites would not allow anyone to post off topic items and digressions are not welcomed. People have to stay within the topic or their posts are deleted and in many cases their accounts are disabled for further interaction. One liners and snide comments against the editors and the management are not welcomed.

I have come to appreciate those sites where I can post my comments and expect a meaningful dialog and interaction with other posters. These sites are respected and quoted in the high echelons of the US establishment.

A site like chowk has to build some value to it. The site needs to attract some qualified writers and journalists to post their articles for a robust but civil discussions and comments. This can not happen until the editors take a firm control of interacts or the posts on the site.

Any posters who is just posting to attack the editors and or other posters should not be welcomed, the language of the post should be within the acceptable boundaries defined by the guidelines and ANY confrontational and communal posts including the ones that test the boundaries of generally acceptable behaviors of respecting people, their faiths, color of their skin, national origin and sexual orientations must be deleted right away.

Chowk is taking the right steps in the right directions.


Omar, let me ask you- would you or the owners or the editors of Dawn publish someone’s comments about them or the poor quality of the Newspaper in the letter to the editors columns instantly?

aaria, even on enlightened chowk we are judged on the smell of heeng and dal-khory ;-)

an enlightened (sligthly) desi gannawala passed some legendary judgements to much approval. so we are at least as good at judging as the as those goras.

For so many South Asians-this is home.
We are judged by the color of our skin, or our teeth, the size of our shoes or what we use to cover our heads.

Many of us Pride ourselves on reading US weekly, but apparently tabloid news is universal news.

Many of us say ``uh-huh`` because the American English language has no equivalent to be used when we need to describe what we wish to say.

Eloquence is an acquired state.

Caps in Sushi restaurants, its all fusion- America- or parts of it ARE fused.

And as for the fair and lovely cream, interestingly that has happened to me TWICE, once in Lahore and once in Islamabad.

So you ask why we stay? Because this is home.

Re: # 32

`On the one hand everyone`s looking to prove their points no matter how miniscule or petty they are.`

Isn`t that the point? To prove your points with debate `no matter how miniscule or petty they are`? Would you rather that we discuss favorite perfumes or planets and exercsie subjectivity over such wonderful points of views?

Please note that through these petty debates, people like Dawn editors are exposed for the nikammay bums that they are... unless of course you are jealous of Versey too.

These FP interacts have become so childish I can hardly believe this is the same Chowk anymore. On the one hand everyone`s looking to prove their points no matter how miniscule or petty they are. On the other hand the editor is using the board to scold and chastize interactors who are critical of her or what she writes. I thought Chowk was a Web site, not a vendetta. It is going to take a lot of effort on the part of both Chowk staff and its interactors to convince me that we haven`t lost the plot entirely.

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