The Clash of Stupidities

[..Similarly, all the recent brouhaha over whether to draw purdah over the veil could have been avoided if people could just talk straight.....]

Ok, here is the straight talk. We non-muslim men have no problems if the fat, ugly muslim women wear veils. In fact, we wish the fat, ugly non-muslim women also start wearing veils.

Our objection is only to the cute muslim girls wearing weils. Imagine if Madhu Bala, Saira Bano, Parveen Babi or Zeenat Aman (Zeenie baby...yeah!!) wore veils. That would have been a crime against humanity!!

Excellent, like all of Mrs. Minhas` pieces I`ve read.

My Life As A Bra by che guevara Chapter 2


Started by scout(new) on December 3, 2006 3:22pm PT

It finally happened one day. I got sold. The chaati-bund wala had taken special care to hang me lowest on the stand, within the reach of the occasional woman who dared buy a bra on her own. As I hung listlessly by my strap, I felt a small hand pulling me by my cups. The chaati-wali felt my every inch. She pulled my straps and tugged at my clasp to make sure I was worth the 50 rupees. I was so excited I almost fell apart at the seams with joy. As she held me against her breasts to check my size, I realized that I wasn’t a young bra anymore. I was growing up. Soon my silky self would be elegantly strapped against live, warm skin. My sahelis (aashee the demicup and samina the minimizer and zeena the sports bra) looked on with longing and despair. It would be some time before they would meet a similar fate. The market had been slow and specialty bras were feeling the pain. Wrapped in tissue paper, I bid adieu to my friends and nestled into the paper bag, my clasps warm with excitement, my cups folded against each other. As the chaati-wali drove home, I eagerly waited for the next step in my journey. Would she like me? Would I be her favorite or would I be banished into the deepest corner of her drawer? As the chaati-wali undressed and took me out of my bag, I gasped and shivered with anticipation……….

Story of zeena, the sports bra and scout, the chatti bund bra


``Hi, I am zeena, the sports bra and I am here to buff you up. I run on the treadmill and I eat turnips and stay trim. That is why you should not pick me. If you wear me and cut me open all you will find is skin and bones. If you try to unstrap me into my wing, all you will find into is hard muscle.

``In fact, it is so hard, it will break your teeth and if you wear me, I will give you a heart attack. All you people know my most favorite phrase `I`ll be back with more gunpowder under my wings.

Hi, I am scout, the chatti bund bra, I am the scariest , super model bra ever invented in history,
My feathers look like a skull with two bones crossing over it. I am poisonous for those who try to deceive me and love for those who befriends me.I have a fiberglass base. I sail on an skateboard.I am your chatti bund. I have sour meat. I only eat corn. I eat cabbage. I swallowed a whole horn of gunpowder once.``

I am a movie star and model.

``You can`t wear me because Hollywood needs me.

#106 by saminasha2 on December 3, 2006 3:26pm PT
for aashee

Chapter 2

As I hang here floating in the wind, the fragrance of chicken tikka and khachaloo drifts by. I can hear the sellers calling out`` chana jor garam! dahey buray!`` and the screams of children playing cricket in the street. Koels perch on trees nearby and sing their sad refrain. I shall miss them when She comes to claim me. I must absorb every sound, every smell, before it is washed out of me with woolite.

The other bras have already formed their cliques, mostly by size. The A`s chitchat wispily about raindrops and being stuffed into gym bags. The B`s are dreaming about whether their owner will be able to pass her management exams and make it up the corporate ladder. The C`s have the saltiest senses of humor-they whistle at the skinniest ooglers and snicker, ``oye baba, i am too much woman for you, go find my younger sister A!``. The D`s are already planning their lives of rest in the almari or looking at the key ring of the biwi of the house. I listen to them and wonder, what will my life be?


Chapter 1


I am soft and silky, like the youngest petals of a gulabi bush. Here I hang at the chaat bund wallah`s stall, a tender bud waiting for someone to buy me. Men walk by and oogle me all day-they want to handle my clasps and pull at my straps. But the chaat bund wallah protects me and keeps me high above the reach of these common gropers who want to bring me home to their wives, who already imagine me wrapped around their wives ordinary bodies.

When will She come to buy me?

quote

`` it is only a matter of time before a man invents a mind bra (left brain, right brain, watch them jiggle). ``


Unquote



How about this OLD one, there is nothing Right in the left Brain, and nothing Left in the Right Brain......??

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Instead of calling the veil a symbol of ‘separation’, Straw and Blair should have called it a symbol of ‘stupid.’

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Veil symbolizes many things including separation, stupidity, cruelty, chauvinism, backwardness, orthodoxy, Mulluahism (foolishness), Ayatullahism (even bigger foolishness) and the list goes on.

It is time that Muslim elite stood up for the progress in Muslims societies. Trying to correct Straw, Blair, or Bush is counterproductive.

Shandana, it doesn`t surprise me that some people think blouses are getting too small, but I must say I haven`t heard about it or read about it. It won`t do them any good though to complain though.

Interesting...but what`s your point?
Shouldn`t people be allowed to wear whatever they want but take cultural sensitivities into account too since every culture is different?

This article reminded me of the following verses of Akabar Allahabadi. I am writing them from memory so the accuracy of diction (particularly of the third line) is not guaranteed. Anyhow it goes like this:

Bey purdah kal joh a`aeen nazr chand beebiyan
Akbar zameen mein ghairat-e-quami sey ghad gaya
Poocha joh unn sey aap ka purdah kya huya
Kahne lageen keh aqk peh mardo`n kee pud gaya

Mohammad Gill

Einstein: Only two things are infinite: The universe and human stupidity``.

I am not sure about the universe.

Correction to my last post:
The word ``aql`` was misspelt inadvertently as ``aqk.`` Please note it.
Mohammad Gill

I don`t understand what Mulim women wants?
hajab in dance party , hajab on seashore. Date with hajab.
all lover of veils should push back to Sudia Arab.

Freethinker if Akbar Allahabadi would have been alive today perhaps he would have written it this way:

Purday main kal joh a`aeen nazr chand beebiyan
Akbar zameen mein zillatt-e-quami sey ghad gaya
Poocha ke kub sey aankh pe purdah ye pur gaya
boleeN ke jub se aqkl peh mardo`n kee pud gaya

Shandana -- you wrote a shandar column -- congratulations.

Ooook..another column of the friggin veil. Make up your minds my muslim brothers and sisters..once and for all. There is too much confusion about whether or not to wear the veil. I say, do it like the arabs do. Keep your bitches in burlap and make sure they use curlers for their unibrows.