Imran Khan the Politician

Re: # 68

... i knew there was something familiar about the penguins ............

Uncle Hamidum Sahib #65,

Janaab, as you said we agree on most things. The way these American and European Muslims are behaving, they are well on the way to becoming just like the Antarctican Muslims.

Sarwar Sukhera Sahib,

Many many years ago (actually it was the year that Zia died), as a young teenager I was tasked to cleanup an attic which was overflowing with old issues of Mag, Sab Rang Digest etc. While doing the cleanup, I found a few old issues of Dhanak Magazine, of which you were the founder/editor (?).

Sirji, I have been a fan ever since. Glossy page after glossy page of beautiful cleavage, Aasia here and Babra there, Kavita pouting and Sangeeta gyrating, Husna in bikini (yes a bikini!) smooching Syed Kamal on a boat, Nisho and Mumtaz wearing sheer transparent fabrics, the former without a bra and the later without an undie... Jesus H Christ! I had little idea till then of what Pakistan was like before Zia. Although I had heard that there were 2 bars on Bank Road Rawalpindi, I never knew how fair Zamarrud and Nazli were and how much these fair minded ladies were willing and eager to bare it all for the awam.

If you are the same Sarwar Sukhera then my salam to you. I heard that Zia banned your magazine and you ended up in exile in the US. If you are back in Pakistan then please consider restarting the Dhanak Magazine.

Imran is a good guy, so help him God.

All the best.

#64 Hamidum Sahib {``he was a big man - so big that he qualified to attend the queen`s coronation ``}

Hamidum Sahib,
I read with great admiration all the details about your shoulder length hair and how a bottle of Head N Shoulders solved your dandruff issues so that the god damned Hindoos would let you eat food with them in communal form without the extra dash of Mrs. Dash. :)

Sir, if your father was qualified to attend the Queen`s coronation then was it in 1952 (Liz II) or 1837 (Vicky)? Or do we have to go all the way back to William & Mary in the very late 1600s or Annie in early 1700s? Maybe it was Liz the Foist all along .....

Re: # 63

salim beta,

............ i agree with you in that most paki-americans, primarily because of their obsession with religion, will end up in the ghetto with masadi as their leader ..... just like the european muslims ...........

.......... like i said, i agree with you on most things .........

Re: # 62

salim mian,

........ in my younger days, i too used to `express my views` on partition and reunification just to tick off my father ........... in those days i also had shoulder length hair, wore an orange-brown shalwar kameez, and talked about the dictatorship of the proletariat and called my father a `petty bourgeois` ....... more importantly, i used to smoke a pack of bharay huay cigarettes a day - heck, i was so good that i could empty a K-2 and fill it up again with one hand in less than two minutes ! ....... it was a wonderful time but i am glad i am past all that now even though it is bad for my liver .........

............but this is what my father would say whenever i brought up the issue of partition, `` oye, tum baniyay ki asliyat nahin jaantay ........... hum un kay saath reh chuckay hain ........ hum nain railway staiono per per sirf `musalmaan pani` piya hai aur hamairi majal nahin thee kay un kay hindoo nalkay say pani peenay ki jurat kartey `` ............ he was a big man - so big that he qualified to attend the queen`s coronation - and i am lucky that i am still alive inspite of pushing all his hot buttons ............. but years later i realized the wisdom of his words ............. i don`t think he ever fully understood what a `petty bourgeois` was, but a few years ago he did call me a capitalist pig and told me that he was proud that i had managed to get over the nonsense of my youth ..... we all do ............

#60 hamidum2 {``similarly, i don`t think george allen was too far off the mark in comparing indians to the noisy and irritating macacas .......... ``}

Uncle hamidum,

The Senator from Virhinia missed the mark and the boat ever since he made that stupid comment. Senator-elect Webb is building a monument on the Mall to the young Indian who instigated the demise of Senator Allen by trying to videotape George`s nasal hair. While Pakistanis may relish the fateful comment, there is no denying that the bottom line of American politics has Indians coming in first, second, and third - regardless of who is in power. Whether Indians are birds, monkeys, or reptiles, Pakistanis end up being what these animals leave on the rock.

Hamidum Sahib #60,

I expressed my views on partition and reunification and was immediately banned for a fourth of a fortnight. Now you are trying to get me in trouble by accepting Tahmed`s Neanderthal discovery of associating human philosophy with animal representations. I thought that with the advent of the Cro-Magnons, we had advanced beyond grunting animal names to identify how we felt about issues. You will never convince me that Tahmed actually walks on two legs and uses fire to warm his meat.

#59, tahmed {``it is ridiculting a poor animal to compare it with a liar. ``}

Tahmed,
So now you are descending to sculpting a new language? :)

Re: # 58

salim mian,

... i agree with you on most things but i think you are unnecessarily taking umbrage at tahmed comparing humans to animals - more often than not it is a very effective way of describing some folks` physical attribute ............. for example, i had some childhood friends named bagla (stork), sanda (ox), ghora (horse) and pidi (flea) .......... now, you must admit that even without ever knowing these people you can guess with a 90% degree of accuracy what these people looked like ...........

... more importantly, you can sometimes use an animal allegory to describe a person`s personality traits - for example, i don`t think it would be wrong to compare masadi to a mule (obstinate), pidi (small and insignificant) or an ostrich (with his head in the sand)............... similarly, i don`t think george allen was too far off the mark in comparing indians to the noisy and irritating macacas ..........

...... but i do agree that it is entirely possible that animals might take offense at being compared to some people ............

#58 you are right. animals dont lie. it is ridiculting a poor animal to compare it with a liar.

#54 {``Okla: Please dont joke with the macaca. ha! ha!``}

Mr. Tahmed,
Please don`t refer to your fellow human beings as animals. This association of one`s human opponents to familiar animals is an obvious betrayal of one`s limited horizons, even more limited intelligence, and a positive reaffirmation of one`s extreme simplicity bordering on the stupidity.

``Grunt, look Tak look - pig, cow, bear, bird, fish.``

anil #28 {``Salim sahib:
I am following Hamidm sahib`s foot steps, and in holiday season enjoying at Chowk.
``...the piety of Aurangzeb...``
Can you also take him out of Indian history completely?``}

Anil bhai,
You can certainly follow Hamidum Sahib`s footsteps - just make sure that you stay back a safe distance. :)

Yes, the piety of Aurangzeb is legendary as are his courage, honesty, determination, and extreme lack of corruption - and he managed to do all that as an Indian ruler who united India more completely than any ruler before him.

You are welcome to take him out of Indian history, just as the maps of Kashmir that show Mirpur and Muzaffarabad as indubitably within India. :)

People who can rewrite geography to suit their bias can certainly do the same for history.

I hope that you had a Merry Xmas and I wish you and your family a Happy New Year.

majumdar #29 {``Salimbhai, Why do you call MAJ (pbuh) an idiot and imbecile? ...there is nothing about him to suggest that he was anything but a very determined person and a spokesman for his community. And his essential prescription about not mixing religion with politics etc. were all very praiseworthy and sagacious. ``}

Majumbhai,
Most notorious demagogues have possessed the twin qualities of determination and eloquence. I think the list of such criminals is both long and sad and I don`t need to cite examples throughout history.

As for mixing religion with politics, I consider mixing of religion with geography, religion with economics, and religion with statehood a far more sinister crime.

#53 you can only shame someone with self-respect. given the brazen manner in which this man lies, it is obvious you cant shame him.

Okla: Please dont joke with the macaca. ha! ha!