A Teacup in My Hand

Re: # 62


Sadly, though one can not ignore the fact that an uneducated woman, who has spent all her life, in the belief that she can not survive in this society without a man, and unfortunately, also brainwashed that it will be wrong for her to not acquiesce to monogamy since religion allows it, does indeed, have a very low self esteem.

And for those simple woman, even a short story, which might lack intellectual depth, can be a source of hope and strength. But you missed the point there... The emphasis is not the story or the ``inspiration`` as you put it, it is the fact that many women in Pakistan , do not have the strength to stand up for themselves. And that indeed, is a very sorry state of affairs.


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Re: # 65

Elusive - I appreciate your insightful post, but I beg to differ with you on the sorry state of affairs. I have come across some very bold and brave women who have gone through major changes in life and have still kept on going despite all the emotional fiascos, heartbreaks and divorces. I do not think people enjoy that experience, but that`s life. Yes, the women were well-educated professionals and had more options than a woman who is not.

I am not saying that we should ignore the uneduated women, but I did not read this fictional work geared towards uneducated women. Did the writer mention anywhere that Sonya came from such background ? I may have missed that. I really found the right of divorce subject interesting as that creates awareness. There are not that many write-ups on Chowk where this is mentioned. Hats off to Tahera for raising the awareness on the said right!

In my opinion, this right is granted to women in educated and enlightened families who care for their daughters` well being and are not superstitious or traditionally blind. To me, Sonya`s aunt was a wise woman who thought on those lines. I do not see this episode addressing the unfortunate women of the Pakistani society who were uneducated.

While reading this well put together fictional piece, I had a completely different audience in mind and that`s why I raised my earlier points and expectations. Now, if we apply this story to the kind of audience you are referring to, I would tend to agree with you. Unfortunately, my point of reference was different.

I am an optimist, not an escapist :)

Re: # 66

Zahra. I totally agree with you. :)

Its just that i know of somene, who was not educated when faced with a similar situation. And she filed for Khula, resumed her education, and stated working. In fact she was working at quite a high post in a mltinational company, the last time i met her.


And... may the Optimists prevail. :)

Re #18,32,44,56,66

I don’t know if I am missing something here, but you seem to dislike this short story because YOU want to see it ending in a different way!

You have repeatedly mentioned phrases like ‘What I would have liked to see’ and ‘What the writer should not have done’. Well I think this is the prerogative of the writer to portray a character in whatever manner she wants. SHE has written this story. There are all sorts of people in our society – some women in Pakistan are emancipated as you mentioned but a great majority is not. If the writer chooses to write about them it is her choice. In fact the character of Sonya is the epitome of emancipation. The word emancipation means ‘to be free from the control of another’ and that is exactly what she achieves in the story. And believe me, in the real world freedom always comes with a hefty price tag. It is never for free.

Writing about a wrong does not perpetuate that wrong. On the contrary it creates awareness about that wrong and is always the first step toward its rectification. I do not understand how you get this idea that this story is in any way a “low self esteem ‘realistic’ stuff that deprives women of their basic rights”. To me it seems that this story actually should give a lot of courage to women in a society like ours. It shows them possibilities and alternatives to some very difficult situations in life.

And finally, this is a fictional story not a code of law! Literature or for that matter art in any form is not necessarily about an ideal life. That would be escapism. In fact literature need not necessarily be even realistic for it to be enjoyable (hence the word fiction!); although this story does have many features which are a daily occurrence in our part of the world.

So please for a change, stop this litany of ‘how YOU would have wanted the story to continue and end’ and say something about the literary merits and demerits of the story.

good piece !!
nice way of creating scenes ,through time.
to add few things ...........
i wonder why chowk admin promotes anti -islamic concepts.
no offense to anyone in particular, but man marrying twice is not that bad,as it is advertised time to time,by those who are agonist to the idea.(good or bad!!not discussing)
if it`s a matter of having different point point of views, then why we havn`t seen a single article in favor of the point.?
Since it is in accordance to islam, then i guess ,no muslim should have any conflict over the issue, and non-muslims,i believe ,would respect the teaching of other religion .!

Re#69

Thanks for your comments, and appreciation.

Islam allows polygamy, it is a fact no one can dispute. But, `a man marrying twice is not that bad` is something, I think, that the person on the receiving end, i.e. the woman, would be a better judge of. A man may disagree; it is his prerogative

This story has projected a woman`s viewpoint. There`s no conflict over the concept of polygamy here, but if a woman decides to opt out of such an arrangement and move on with her life, there`s no compulsion on her to stay on and endure it.