The Dreaded Phone Call

Sorry about your loss.

Dear Ejaz,

Innalillahe wa inna elaihe raje`oon. May Allah bless the soul of your dad and give you strength to cope with your loss. Your dad made an investment into you by raising you in best of his abilities and you can only payback for his kindness by praying for him as often as possible. As long as you live, and you keep doing it, he will benefit from it.

THe `dreaded call` for me came exactly this day one year ago. The call was from my mother herself, right before she was leaving for hospital. She had been to hospital many times in past two decades because of her diabetes, but only this time she told me that she loved me more than her life and it was time for her to say good bye. I sobbed and begged her not say that but she said not to worry because she had already received the invitation from a better place. She sounded like she was smiling like a parent who smiles at some silly but adorable act of her child. I left everything aside and caught the first flight to Pakistan. Before going into deep comma she was told the day of my arrival. I reached to her in hospital directly from airport at around 5:00 in the morning. Just as I touched her feet and said `ammi ji` she unexpectedly opened her eyes from comma and looked at me and passed away at that very moment - the prayer caller was calling believers to their Flallah, their welfare, at that very moment- she had accepted that call.

This week just two days before her first anniversary my father answered the call at exactly the same moment in the morning. He passed away peacefully in his sleep. He didn`t even say goodbye. Some buddy he proved to be.

#2 Urstruly

Sir, I am sorry about your loss, too.

Sorry about your loss. Losing a parent is like losing a main part of oneself. No matter, how old or how young, the gap left behind is never fully filled. Only memories are left as a source of comfort.

Dear Ejaz, I can understand how Pakistani funerals can be bit taxing, and the focus is more on mourning the loss and less on remembering the blessings, but there are those who find the western funerals nothing more than an orchestrated stage show, with even details as minute as flower arrangements are meticulously addressed. Yes, we don’t sit Shiva, we don’t have eulogies, but we do have Soem, ChaliswaaN, and other rites to bring some comfort. May you find peace in the memories of your dad.

Very sorry to her about your recent bereavement of your ``abba``..Although we know it happens to everyone born its very traumatic ..
i have not recovered from the stress that you have experienced

my condolences to you

Sorry to hear about your dads passing away.

The probablity of infection spreading from the knee to the brain is lesser than strokes from blood clots as a result of lack of medical prophylaxis for this.

In either case, your doctor could have plenty of explaining to do.

May his soul rest in eternal Peace.
Parents are a great blessing. They for the headquarter of the family. Suddenly when they leave, things look empty and we suddenly realise what all we miss that we never noticed earlier.
God Bless

I wish I could say something to comfort you, but I can`t. Most people never ever get over the death of a close family member, but it does get better. All I can say is that you were obviously lucky to have had him as a father, and he was lucky to have a loving son in you.

My condolences. May the dear departed soul rest in eternal peace.

Ejaz,

Innalillahe wa inna elaihe raje`oon. My heartfelt condolences to you. Thank you.


Mansoor

Ejaz - Sorry to hear about your loss. Hopefully, you will be able to regain your focus soon.

Re: # 2

Dear Urstruly - Very sad to hear about your parents` demise. It must have been real tough to face the loss one after the other. My heartiest condolences to you and to your family. I am sure the good memories will stay with you to enrich your life.

Best Wishes.

Thank you all for your kind words.

Ejaz,
Losing a loved one is bad enough; living half-way around the world and going through the guilt of just living your life away from the loved one is worse. I hope you can start on the path of grieving and eventually remember the good times with a smile in your heart.

Thanks all for your kind words and prayers. They have made a difference. Its good to know the kindness of strangers.

Deepest condolonces to both the author and urstruly. Life and loved ones are precious.

Ritu