What Lies Beneath: Dispatch from the Frontlines of the Burqa Brigades

Dear Fawzia,

(Confession: I only just now read your piece.)

First, let me extend my warm congratulations to you on your getting inside that mosque of (lately begotten) fame. We can all sit here and run our mouths, but stepping into that territory – dressed the way you were – takes real courage. (I know you were given assurances – but so was Danny Pearl.)

Although your account is a bit on the long side – I enjoyed reading it. (In other words, Kaal, go jump into a lake!) It is highly descriptive and describes events they took place – not putting any particular spins – like most articles do.

I am impressed to learn that the Aziz guy does not talk to women – apparently, he only likes to dress like one! :)

Since my dear little sis Zeena seems to have taken a break (unless she has disappeared amongst that swarm of the burqa-wallis), let me say this…

This group’s focus on improving the sexual morality of Pakistan is not something to be sneezed at. As we are all aware (especially the Pakistanis) – it is the Pakistanis’ incessant desire for sex which is at the root of most problems of that country.

I mean, Pakistanis have so many problems already – why do they wish to add sex to that list?

It would be like “eating cake” – when they are dying of hunger – so hungry for spiritual values, of course – my Pakistani brothers and sisters! My heart bleeds for them. :(

These women have it all figured out – they are not happy, these rich Pakistani men, despite many wives, mistresses, cars, guards… even after eating all that mutton of 350 rupees a kilo – but a bottle of Orange Fanta would beat sex any day!

Umm Kulsoom may be on to something here – these Pakistani mazdoors have a tough life – trying to live life in the big city at meager wages. But the solution seems quite innovative – just take away their sex (especially if they are ladies) and their life would be blissful again!

You see how simple it is – no sex, no problems!

In fact, no sex – then no Pakistanis – no nothing!

Fawzia, I looked eagerly through your text for the key question (but could not find) that I would have asked the Mullah had I been interviewing him.

A key question is – do the Mullahs themselves practice brahmacharya, and is it difficult to do so when surrounded by so many of the fair sex with such uniform looks?!

Perhaps you forgot to ask.

Perhaps you had a good reason to not ask.

Did I say congratulations on your getting in there?! Perhaps I should have said congratulations on getting out! :)

Somehow, the place reminds me a bit of the “Roach Motel” device – any roach can check in, but few can check out!

Re: # 111

Kaalchakra:

Your spin does not create enough vortex to suck me in.

#98 by neembu on July 6, 2007 2:58pm PT


Believe me, any woman posting intelligent ideas will be dragged through the gutter


You should be fine then....

“Guess Me” Contest……

Am I,

1. Uncle Aziz

2. Naughty Aunty Aziz

3. Both

1st Prize: An aerial view of La Red Mosque from a chopper……

2nd Prize: 3 Nights 4 days stay in La Red Mosque, guaranteed intimate evenings featuring readings by celebrated authors, jazz fusion music, food and drinks. Solemn discussions on “burqua and its increasing importance in jihadi escapades” by notorious mullahs on offer too…………

3rd Prize: 6 Nights 7 days stay in La Red Mosque, guaranteed intimate evenings featuring readings by celebrated author Sir Salman Rushdie, jazz fusion music by the Pakistani Rangers and the Army, food and drinks……..
Illuminating discussions on “The Burqa- How not to make it stringy, rock-hard, coarse textured etc by Maulana Aziz
Special discourse by Bun laden on “The Burqa- Why all men must wear them in public” and much more…………….

hey zeemax: what`s the difference between the child molesting david koresh and your child molesting islamists mullah buddies?.....david koresh went down fighting....

Sez it all!!! Heheheh...

``Walking out in a hot and sweaty daze from the classroom, haunted by the echoes of those voices shouting their Allah-ho Akbars, I wondered if what I smelt was the stench of purity. I turned to look out at the space beyond the classroom, and realized I was standing next to the communal latrines. Curiosity curdled into nausea, and I knew it was time to go.``

The stench of purity!!!!next to the communal latrine...heheheheh

Ma`am, You just earned your doctorate.....

I read somewhere that nut case general and Indian Mahasabha’s favorite Hameed Gul is really upset at the two brothers. Hamid Gul in a statement said, “These are just moulvis and Musharaf should not try to duplicate this effort in the tribal area, where the army will face the hardcore jihadis”.

The truth be told; There is no difference between the hardcore jihadi and the two mullah brothers. They are almost the same. Look at the two hardcore Jihadis Mullah Omer of Afghanistan and OBL of Saudi Arabia. They perhaps disappeared in the mountains using burka as the new Islamic-Houdini tool for disappearing act.

The mullah fascination with Burka is well known. They like every female to wear burka and occasionally don’t mind using it themselves. Hey! Everyone has a feminist side.

This is turning out to be one of the most hilarious part of the political chronicle written out in Pakistan for the last sixty years.

The worst part is that some kids are dead because both mullah brothers liked Burka so much.

it looks that wife of Aziz is following a comunist cum socialist agenda which think human to only them ...

Dear Dr. Fauzia,
I noticed that neembu has tried to malign my name (in her post #95) by suggesting that I, atif, in someway maligned you. I am reproducing the exact dialogue that occured between neembu and myself on unplugged and as you notice nowhere have i been disrespectful to you. Please also notice my innocence and sincerity in the face of her viscious questioning. Regards.

neembu: Dr Fawzia Afzal Khan is on fp and the unkils are baying
atif: neembu, is she hot looking?
neembu: you`ll never be as smart as her. ever. even in your fantasies
atif: in my fantasies i would rather be getting laid than being a smart cookie
neembu: denied on both counts
atif: i tried
neembu: i wish you`d try that much at studying
atif: you cant get laid with the books
neembu: threatened?
atif: depends on dr. fauzia`s looks
neembu: clearly her mere punctuation sends you into paroxyms of insecurity, what would you do if she looked at you?
atif: i might melt, depending on her looks
neembu: what about your ``looks``? judging by your posts you must be extremely good looking
atif: sometimes its ok to judge a book by its cover
neembu: as if women want to actually listen to your lines
atif: lines are not meant to be listened to...they are meant to be picked up
neembu: where is your pic? you must be feeling really insecure today!
atif: you call it me being ``insecure``, i call it me being ``horny``..different words, same meanings

Kalashnikov rifle inventor says conscience clear
Fri Jul 6, 2007 10:25AM EDT


MOSCOW (Reuters) - The man who created the Kalashnikov automatic rifle exactly 60 years ago said on Friday his conscience was clear, even though his invention has been used to kill many thousands of people.

Mikhail Kalashnikov was a young tank commander recovering in hospital from injuries sustained in World War Two when he took a child`s notebook and sketched out the design that would later become the AK-47.

Sixty years later, the rifle is the weapon of choice for many -- be they Iraqi insurgents, Venezuela`s military or African child soldiers in T-shirts and flip-flops. Between 50 and 80 million have been produced and they even feature on the flag of Mozambique.

``Some people say how can you sleep at night, because of your work so many people have died?``` 87-year-old Kalashnikov told reporters at an event at Moscow`s Armed Forces Museum to mark his weapon`s 60th anniversary.

``I tell them I sleep fine. It is politicians that are to blame because they fail to come to agreement and instead resolve their problems with violence,`` he said.

``I created the weapon at the time of World War Two, when we had to defeat the most powerful enemy, Fascist Germany ... I created this weapon so it could be used to defend the borders of our country.``

RELIABLE HANDS

The AK-47 was named after its creator -- the acronym stands for `Avtomat Kalashnikova` or `Kalashnikov`s automatic weapon` -- and 1947, the year the first experimental versions went into production.

The weapon and its later modifications have become the world`s most popular assault rifle, largely because it is cheap, easy to use, has few moving parts and rarely goes wrong.

Kalashnikov, who has a slight tremor in his hands and speaks in a high-pitched croak, is feted at home as a national treasure.

He accepted there was a problem with the manufacture of unlicensed Kalashnikovs which could be bought by criminals and insurgents. ``We need to make sure each weapon only ends up in reliable hands,`` he said.

But that aside, he said he had few regrets, not even giving up the copyright to his design to the Soviet state.

``People say: `If you lived in the West you would have been a multi-millionaire by now.```

``They get hung up on the green stuff, on dollars. But are there not other valuable things in life? Which of the Western weapons makers can say that a bronze statue of them has been built in their home village?``

#124 by atif2,

Yes I think it was Ali_1 who posted her photo and said she looked like Ginger Lynn or something ... but that should be a compliment, no? I thought feminists/liberals like neembu and the author firmly support working women`s (i.e. prostitution) rights .... so porn stars should be just `movie stars` like anyone else and the author should be flattered .....

Unless of-course neembu is a complete fake and a hypocrite, she can`t be offended by Ali_1`s remark.

Maulana Aziz........aside from providing comic relief has also created a world-wide interest in the Burqa.......

The top fashion designers are gonna roll-out ``see-through burqas`` low-cut burqas, ``family size burqas`` with enough space to accomodate your friendly Great Dane too..... and a ``male only`` burqa in the near future.......

Self-help authors are feverishly writing books like ``Pot-Bellied and unable to get into a burqa-Help is at hand`` , `` benefits of jogging in a burqa`` ``you and your burqa.............

If the Maulana dude is smart he must copyright that burqa clip of his fast..........

#96 by fak0912

... I did what i have been trained to do: listen to the other side without condemnation and hatred....

Fine. But you certainly haven`t been taught to avoid contempt.

When ``... I wondered if what I smelt was the stench of purity. I turned to look out at the space beyond the classroom, and realized I was standing next to the communal latrines....``, it was because the contemptible `purity` there doesn`t have en-suite ones.

Lady, places like that are not for you to visit or comprehend. Suffice with contemplating what the hell they`re all about while sitting in your jaccuzi.