Sex Education For the Next Generation

Re: # 362
Zara_K...
Ans: Some of the sexual disorders can be treated and you can get well...

Re: # 367 please reply to my request on mujahid_of_Allah@hotmail.co.uk (for naqashbandi)

Re: # 49 where can i get a copy of the book, to read by imam suyuti on sex, the sex manual which he wrote that is similar to shaykh nafzawi's
preferably a online coy of the book by imam suyuti on sex would be appreciated.
i have been looking for this for a long time, after i came to know of it, i have read nafzawi's but would like to read his now.

Re: # 362

Poor hubby! Now will have to pay 'maintainence' for a mistake by hiw wife!

More and more divorces are being caused by high sexual drive by the female these days. Makes you wonder what maintainence is for!

www.womensinfidelity.com

What's in a saint? if speaking with Islam in mind there is no need for a mediator between Allah & (banda) the follower, if one has a need they need to make a sincere (dua)prayer to God to help him/her overcome the situation while by my own experience in any concern Allah SWT has always answered my pleas and requests favorably.
With due regards to believers of other faiths I am not sure what are the systems of submission to God and to pray for one's needs.
It is however widely accepted in the western arenas of medicine that those with faith have a proven record of faster and better recovery rates and I am sure similarly it also applies to this segment where some men or women are not fully fit to perform in matrimony.

"While I worked in the obstetric department in a Women’s Hospital in Peshawar Pakistan I was shocked to find out that many men and women had no understanding of human physiology and did not know that ovulation took place 14 days before menstruation and that the human sperm and ovum live for only 24—48 hours and if they did not make love during those 48--96 hours they would not get pregnant. I met many infertile women who went to holy shrines to pray for children rather than obtaining medical help for their problems."
You will be even more shocked to learn that such people exist in the west too, in USA & Europe, what is the big surprise?

#362 Zara_k
I feel so sorry for you ex-husband. This is quite a common behaviour among virgin men especially when the are under performance anxiety (as Dr Sohail mentioned). This has nothing to do with ones sexual orientation. You guys should have given it more time. Marriage is not just all about sexual intercourse anyways. There is so many other ways such as oral sex that a couple can start their sexual interaction with.

I have gone through similar experience during my first marriage, which unfortunately ended up in a divorce in a month due to my performance anxiety problem.
Thankfully, I got married again and with my wife co-operation, I was able to overcome my anxiety in few months and now we have (by the grace of God) excellent sex life and three healthy children.

When my first marriage ended up in divorce, I found out that I was not alone who suffered from this anxiety. Some of my close friends and cousins also disclosed it to me that they went through similar experiences at the start of their married life.

No need to apologize.

It was an arrange marriage. He said i am the first and only girl who he has been with ever. My dad met up wih the Urologist and he told my dad that my husband is not attractive towards women. I spoke with this lady who has done PHD in gender studies, she also told me the same thing. The problem is he wouldnt admit that he has a problem. Each time we tried he made a different excuse. One day i came home from work and he said he was able to perform to himself and that is when i got to believe he really has problem. He is able to do it but just not with me. Unfortunatly i cant go back to him becuase it has been really a mess now between two families.

Re: # 360
dear zara,,,since i had moved on to the next article i did not check interactions of this article. so sorry for the delayed response.
most couples i met who did not consumate their marriage, men had performance anxiety and got better after receiving professional help.
i do not know your husband. i wonder whether he was a virgin? what were his previous sexual experiences? did you people know each other before marriage?
my suggestion would have been to see a marital therapist and get proessional help before getting divorced.
sincerely sohail

This is for Khalid Sohail.

I got married on September 1, 2007 and stayed with my husband for 10 days. We didnt have sex at all. Each time we tried, he made different excuses as to he is nervous, he doesnt know what's going with him, he is worried about other things. I finally gave up and came to my parents house. My dad said he is not normal and we have filed for divorce. I talked to so many people and discussed with so many people. Majority of the people told me, there is something wrong with him and very few people said i should have given him more time. I dont want to hurt anybody or harm anybody in anyway. Sohail what do you say about this issue? Thanks

Kaal: The only sufi that I recognize is Sufi Tabassum. :-)

Re: # 357

no.not in the islamic definition of saint.

Re: # 356
dear naqshbandi...how do you define a saint....can someone be a saint without believing in God and Religion....?
What do you say to the people who believe
Spirituality is part of humanity not part of divinity
religion is just one path to spirituality...
there are as many secular saints as religious saints in the world...
sincerely sohail

kaal,

i already gave a substantial list of sufi saints from across the whole subcontinent in one of my earlier posts.

naqsh and ts,

This has been an interesting discussion. One possible way to resolve some of the differences may be if you both of you could care to name, in your own views, the top five or ten (or whatever number of) sufis of all times who worked within the Indian subcontinent. Just off the cuff, athough feel free to change your minds after any discussion.

Naqsh bhai, if you would help us, please focus a little outside of your own specific sufi order(s). And both, please give more weightage to sufis who made a signficant difference historically/socially/and/or religiously in the lives of as many as possible. So sufi working primarily in my mohalla, no matter how beloved, brilliant, and venerated would not make the list. :)

Appreciate the help. You might find that the differences between the two of you can be substantially narrowed. And of course, the rest of us can understand things better too. Thanks in advance.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EB3D9SDAs3I

something to bring comfort to all sincere hearts. a modern sufi in a spiritual state..it is only 10 mins. listen!

salim, you're right.