Daughter of the Beast: The General's New Clothes

RE: #22 Posted by bulleya

Hilarious and creative, but not accurate.

"Scene 4: Dave walks out of the shower, as Ras steps in, wearing nothing but a smile and his I love Asif Zardari towel…"

SHOULD READ

"I love ZAB towel..."

Can't stand the other person...

Re: Asadi # 19

Just to be clear, are you defining the term "bourgeoisie" in a Marxian sense?

The term "bourgeoisie" in my post meant the people who lived in the cities and generally refered to merchants, lawyers etc. It seems that you are putting a Marxian spiel on the French Revolution, but to answer your question; the political power in Europe had started to shift to the urban areas by the time of the French Revolution even though the social structure of the European society was still feudal.

Asadi, as to what I meant by the Third Estate, you do not know and will not know what I mean till you ask me; so please do not assume or think and rationalize what I might have meant! :)

I did not mean bourgeoisie in the sense of the proletariat - that is your inference and in this case, it is misplaced.

Bourgeoisie, in the case of the French society of circa 1700 meant people who lived in the cities and they did not control the means of production. The means of production was controlled by the Second Estate.

I never said that the military dominated the political and social, political or economics affairs in France of the 1700.

I said that Second Estate dominated the military, economic and social affairs in pre-revolution France. Again, please do not twist my words to suit your own peculiar view points. :)

Ciao

re: Asadi # 21

Do you have a solution?

Please ignore Fox; it is a rabid dog of American neo-cons and I do not agree with its views.

If appeasement of the American policy is not an option, then what is the best way to prevent a civil war in Pakistan?

Ciao

The Expat Dilemma:
-----------------

Act 1 – Scene 1: The Men’s shower room at the Dearborn, Michigan Community Center

Hamidm Mian: “Hey Dave, how is it going?”
Dave: “Fine Hamidm Mian”
Hamidm Mian: “Call me HM, Dave...”
Dave: “OK”
Hamdim Mian: “Hey Dave, did I ever tell you about my sprinkler guy.....”
Dave: “Not now, Hamidm Mian…I’m busy showeri…”
Hamidm Mian: “Call me HM…OK, so yesterday, after I had finshed of my four Budwiesers with my White Anglo-Saxon Caucasian friends in the bar, I came back and asked Mrs. HM to hand me a can of Miller Light, which was next to the Merlot….You know I drink alcohol….don’t you”
Dave: “Yes HM….you sent out an email at work, a few days ago, telling all of us.....”
Hamidm Mian: (takes off his jock strap and enters the shower)“Hey Dave, just wanted to show you that I am not like those Pakistanis who take showers with their underwear on……What Maroons!!…You know the type…who prefer caffeine free Pepsi to Hieneken..”
Dave: “Yeah, I know HM….can I just take a shower, please”
Hamidm Mian: “I like to let my boys bounce in the wind….you know like all us Americans…not like those damn maulvis……I was thinking of getting a Union Jack tatooeed on the left one…..but the doctor said, it might cause some problems…..specially since....you know….you know……all the Molsons I enjoy”

Act 1 Scene 2: Tahmad enters, in his birthday suit:

Hamidm Mian: “Hey TA……you are not wearing an underwear…..when did you stop being an extremist…hahaha”
Tahmad: “Hey HM…I used to wear my loongi while I showered, but then I found out that letting my boys blow in the breeze is only forbidden in hadith….Not in the holy book”
Hamidm Mian: “Damn maulvis……I think we should bomb all these idiots who take a shower with their underwear on…..if you can’t show your boys to the boys, then you hate America….Right!!”
Tahmad: “Yeah…I think they should be bombed also…its for their own good…What about you Dave….what are your views about bombing people who shower with their underwear on……?”
Dave: “I am totally against bombing……I hate George Bush…..I am from the Green Party…now let me shower in peace”
Tahmad: “I don’t like it either……but we have to spread democracy and freedom……and you can’t do that if you have all these guys showering in their locker rooms with their swimming suits on”
Hamidm Mian: “Its jock straps, you Maroon….not swimming suits!.....You’ve been living in US of A so long, and still haven’t integrated……..Hey Dave, you know, yesterday, when Bush was speaking about how well the Iraq war was going, I had tears in my eyes……they almost fell on the Guinness that was in my hand……you know I drink, Dave…right”
Dave: “Yes HM, we all know ….we all know!!!………”
Tahmad: “I don’t like Bush, but it’s the WMDs….I wish we didn’t have to bomb Iraq, but well……we have to……to get rid of the extremists……I can’t stand people, who force others to take showers with their undies on….. ….”
Dave: “You guys know we have killed 600,000 people…..!!”
Hamidm Mian: “Yeah….but they all had beards….I can’t stand hair……Anyone with facial hair should be bombed…….Look at me (spreads his arms and opens his legs)….I had all my hair, on my body, surgically removed………”
Dave: “I have a beard……”
Hamidm Mian: “Yeah….but you are bald……and blond…….and a White Anglo-Saxon Caucasian………….you guys are great!!…….You know my great-great grandfather migrated from Kansas to Afghanistan…….”
Dave: “You know our soldiers are getting killed also”
Hamidm Mian: ”Bravest guys in the world……..”
Dave: “Would you send your kids to get killed”
Hamidm Mian: “No way!...Are you nuts!....I believe in Adam Smith’s division of labor….My kids need to pay taxes…….so other people’s kids have enough armor to go fight”
Dave: “So you are a Cheney Republic?...What about you Tahmad”
Tahmad: “Yeah, I am ready to pay extra taxes, if I don’t have to fight….but we have to kill the extremists…..”
Dave: “But we killed 600,000 people”
Tahmad: “Yeah…all those brave souls dying for democracy….They are martyrs, according to my religion…Such brave guys”
Dave: “But they didn’t want to die!!”
Tahmad: “You know us Americans never kill anyone who doesn’t want to die for democracy….all 600,000 wanted to die!”
Hamidm Mian: “Hey Dave, I am going to go have a Lebatt Blue with Arju….I mean with my White Anglo-Saxon Caucasian friends – one is Jewish, one is Irish and a German – after I finish this shower, without my underwear…….do you want to join us…”
Tahmad: “Hey HM, can I come?”
Hamidm Mian: “No, not you………you Maroon!....I only drink with my White Anglo-Saxon Caucasian friends”
TA: “I thought you told me your only friend was Arjunm…”
Hamidm Mian: “TA!..how many times I have told you not to mention him in front of White Anglo-Saxon Caucasians!!…..Hey Dave….Hey, did I tell you about my sprinkler g…..”
Dave: “Let me finish my fuckin’ shower….you idiots…….”
Hamidm Mian: (turns around) “Hey Dave, check this out……I have Rush Limbaugh tattooed on my right cheek and Dinesh D’Souza on my left one….check it out, it looks like they are debating, when I flex my cheeks…….that’s the only debate that should be allowed in our red white and blue country….Dinesh and Rush……you know everyone else hates us, because we are so successful…….bomb’em…..”

Act 1 Scene 3: Urstruly enter the locker room, fully clothed:

Urstruly: (points to Hamidm Mian and Tahmad) “You guys know this is forbidden by Maulana Moudodi….showing your albaab-al-jawaalat-al-takmeeriyaat in public……Damn bastard americans!!”
Tahmad: “It’s only banned in Hadi…”
Hamidm Mian: “TA you Maroon!!…..we need to bomb Urstruly…look at how much hair he has…….He didn’t shave today!!......and after that, we should bomb Dave…..He hates Bush, which means he hates America…..”
Dave: “I don’t hate America……I was born here, you idiot!...”
Urstruly: “Damn bastard Americans…they are going to destroy the Ummah…”
Hamidm Mian: “Why!!”
Urstruly: “I got my Green Card on time, but they delayed my Passport by two days….Damn bastards……these Americans are the cause of every problem in the world….”
Tahmad: “Why do you live in the USA and badmouth it…..when we are trying to spread democracy and kill extremists…….”
Urstruly: “You know when I went to the welfare office to get my check, right before I went to the student assistance office to get aid for my nephew, I found the INS won’t be processing the political asylum applications for my uncle, aunt, and two brothers for another three months…….damn bastard Americans!!”
Tahmad: “Why don’t you look at HM…he lives here and loves the USA…and he supports the bombing of extremists…..each and every one of the 600,000………and he is even ready to work extra to pay taxes for the troops”
Urstruly: “I was duped…….duped into coming to the USA 17 years ago……And they keep duping me every year…….They just duped me two weeks ago…..and then, again two days ago……damn bastard Americans…..they are getting what they deserved…..you know, they aren’t even willing to expedite my cousins’ H1-B visa applications……all five are waiting…….damn Westerners…….you know two of them applied as imams at the local Detroit mosque……and the INS is still not expediting their applications…….these Americans are going to destroy Islam……”

Dave: (rolls his eyes)“…where the hell did all of you come from!!..”
Hamidm Mian: “Hey Dave, did I tell you about my sprinkler guy……He has a collection of Schlitz……”

Scene 4: Dave walks out of the shower, as Ras steps in, wearing nothing but a smile and his I love Asif Zardari towel…

To Be Continued…..

Feroz writes in his ilog "Terrorism cannot be appeased and it has to be crushed before it is able to consolidate itself. Had the government not caved in to the demands of the mullahs of Swat and itself weakened its writ, it would not be in this position today. "

There is no great thought or prediction in this assertion, it is the official US position that their mainstream media (with FOX in the lead) have been stating ever since the deal was stuck in criticism of Pakistan. Unlike the Americans whatever Pakistani government (legitimate or illegtimate) is in power has to live in this neighbourhood and you cannot pick a fight with the indigeneous folk and open another front in your tenuous dictatorship. The choice is between appeasement of the Americans or a mini civil war (totally unnecessary) at the home front. The Americans threatened to get rid of Musharraf so now instead of one shot here or there he is acting as "law man", the greatest terrorists are those that threaten regime change if their desires are not met and they are those that use the excuse of terrorism to bomb and kill innocents (as they have been doing in that very area). You are a damn fool to side with the real terrorists and want us to sing your praises just because you repeat the official US line on the issue. Get a brain fool.....

tahmed writes "The fascists behind these attacks have (wittingly or unwittingly) strengthened Musharraf's hands by making it dangerous for peaceful protestors to even protest this robbery of their basic rights!! "

When properly translated minus the BS, it should read

"The American fascists behind these attacks have very wittingly strengthened BB and Musharaf's hands by making it into a pseudo-emergency like situation where alternatives to those pre-chosen by the Americans will have an increasingly hard time running a meaningful political campaign while making it dangerous for peacful protestors to protest this US robbing of the people's basic rights...

feroz writes "France in 1789, like the medieval European society, was divided into three estates (social classes) and these included the First Estate (clergy), the Second Estate (nobility) and the Third Estates (bourgeoise). "

Einstein, there were no bourgeoisie in Medieval European Society, only when feudalism was overthrown did the bourgeoisie reign supreme. ON the other hand you need to get your terminology straight, by the Third Estate you mean the proletariat or the working class and not the bourgeoisie (i.e. the owners of the means of production).

Finally, if that is your line of thought then the US where the top 1% owns almost 50% of all wealth and where the the rest of American society the "new working class" pays the greatest percent of its income in taxes qualifies more to that effect. Pakistan does not have an independant elite, the military did not dominate economic and political affairs in pre-revolutionary France, and there was no external power that would flood the economy with cash in order to keep the masses at bay and manage the revolution...

re: SR and tahmed32

Pakistan, in a sense, mirrors the contours of the French society on the eve of the revolution in 1789.

The interesting sociological and cultural aspects of the French Revolution was that despite the fact that medievalism-feudalism had ended in Europe by the 1500s, it continued in France till the time of the revolution. France in 1789, like the medieval European society, was divided into three estates (social classes) and these included the First Estate (clergy), the Second Estate (nobility) and the Third Estates (bourgeoise).

The First Estate was made of 1 percent of the French population and did not pay taxes; it owned 10 percent of all the lands in France and had its own legal system and was not accountable to the state.

The Second Estate was made of 2-3 percent of the population and did not pay any taxes and maintained its feudal privileges and dominated the French bureaucracy and the military, owned all the wine presses and flour mills in France, which it rented to the peasants and also acted as advisors to the king.

The Third Estate payed 100 percent of the taxes in France and had no political rights.

The French parliament, the Estates-General, at the time of the French Revolution had not met for a period 175 years!

Pakistan, in many ways, is exactly what France was in 1789 and the noteworthy caveat is that the French Revolution did not happen due to the political reasons, as much as it did from bad harvests, outstanding debts owned by France to Dutch bankers; money borrowed by Louis XIV to finance his European wars and the building of the Palace of Versailles and the ever increasing prices of food - especially bread, which was the staple diet for the Third Estate and thus, the majority of the French population.

Sorry for the history lesson, but I thought that I should aleast bring your attention to social and cultural issues, which were far more instrumental in the bringing about the revolution than politics. French Revolution is a favorite period of mine in European history, but I will stop now. :)

Ciao

Double Khan,

Actually an old Tilyar from Toto?

Writing skills intact..

re: 15

My Order would draft the said indictment longer than your life but not hers! haha

DId your mama name you "Ras" bruv?

We give not a damn about your problems with Chowk.

Tum nay sirf eik theek baat ki, hum double khan hai mama, kiya saamjha

RE: #8 bullpup (or Mr. Khan Squared),

Not knowing whether you are serious or if this is all

a bunch or ORDERLY bull below:

"If my Order were ever instructed to draft the indictment of your leader (BB) and her husband (Asif) it would be longer than your life. Rest assured of that "Ras"."


But judging from the length of this article I am at least

assured that my life will be long and this is not

a threat!

My problem with CHOWK is that almost all of the identities

of its "drop in" writers and interactors are unknown.

If you had written this piece under your real name, your

observations and plan of action would be more credible.

Otherwise, this is another bulleya reaction...

Ras

My Order would like to ask tahmed32 and SR whether or not you gentlemen invite my Order further to do the same again after a brief reobservation of the situation?

SR: I think we already have a reign of terror - what with October 18 and May 12 and the civil war in the tribal areas more Pakistani lives have been lost than were lost in the french revolution.

And indeed in one critical way it is much worse,: whereas the french mobs did not fear suicide bombers in their midst when storming the Bastille or Versailles, peaceful Pakistani demonstrators have something much more sinister to be concerned with than police sticks or tear gas, i.e. they have to also contend with devastating terrorist suicide bombs as happened on October 18 and murderous ghoodna attacks as happened on May 12. One day I hope Pakistan has a memorial to remember the sacrifices paid by these individuals for the cause of restoring the Rule of Law in Pakistan.

The fascists behind these attacks have (wittingly or unwittingly) strengthened Musharraf's hands by making it dangerous for peaceful protestors to even protest this robbery of their basic rights!! We can only watch helplessly, praying for a Deus Ex Machina to save Pakistanis further bloodshed, or do something else to bring this "Clattering Train" from going off track altogether. (Musharraf coming to his senses and allowing Pakistanis to have a normal country with a properly elected and accountable government would be a good start).

Re: # 11 ["...french revolution was ... a failure ..."]

Entirely agreed... Most "revolutions", particularly violent ones, end up making a bigger mess than the mess that prompts the revolution. That has been a recurring tragedy of history. But man is not know to be a rational creature. Man is a rationalizing creature. He acts on impulse, whim, visceral instinct, call it whatever, and only after the fact makes up an elaborate mythical story to justify his actions.

Please understand, I am NOT advocating a Reign of Terror, no, not at all. I am merely predicting it as an unfortunate inevitability of following the course that we have followed for now sixty years with no end in sight.

...SR

SR: While not wishing to spoil the dramatic affect of your references to the guillotine, I would most humbly point out that the french revolution was in fact considered a failure by the french themselves. All it resulted in was a military dictator with dreams of becoming an emperor, endless strife, and the re-instatement of the Bourbon dynasty.

Writing 50 years after the revolution, de Tocqueville referred to the failed french revolution, travelled to the US to learn why the US succeeded. He was widely read by the french in his day, and this time (sans guillotine), the french got it right.

Of course Pakistanis are smarter (being Allah's Chosen Ummah) than the french and have nothing to learn from the US experience with how to curb unlimited power. Nor for that matter from the British experience, nor the French experience, or the Indian experience, nor the Japanese experience, nor the German experience, nor the more recent Turkish experience, let alone the Costa Rica experience (which is the only country in the world today that has actually abolished its army and is doing fine)...

Re: # 7 ["...The murderers of October 18th have to be dealt with severely..."]

Aameen .. Ras bhai.

There are far too many lives being sacrificed at the alter of the many Cults of Personality that rampage through our urban areas. No sacred cow or divine icon is too precious to justify this blood streaming down the clogged drains of our crumbling cities.

Not only the murders of Oct 18th, but also of the day MQM went amock in Karachi, the Waziristan atrocities, the suicide bomb sponsors from militant religious fanatics to criminal law enforcement and armed services big dogs all the way to "westernised secular elite" leaders some of whom are just "Winter Pakistanis," they should all be brought to justice.

If the lawyers' movement had any vision or character they would aim towards a National Truth and Reconciliation type of movement that brings it all to light and aims at rebuilding civil society from a foundation of trust. If this is not done, the alternative is more bloodshed and a real Reign of Terror (not this zankhooN ka martial law).

Summary trials could one day be held by the various "Comité de salut public" compsed of soldiers and citizens alike (but NOT of senior officers or politicians) who will sit in quick judgement, eager to lynch the murders, robbers and other Hyenas and crocodiles in swift and cold dispensations of justice that will, unfortunately, not always be very just -- but they will be very severe.

If we find a Tellyrand and a Robespierre or two, they will suffice. I hiope they bring back the guillotine which is far more humane than a firing squards. We don't want a Pol Pot wearing a turban, a beard and a Klashnkov. (That alternative is even more frightening.)

There is no peace until there is justice. And justice is only justice if it is justice for ALL.

...SR