The Psychology of Mothering

akcheema #79 As a doctor, when you performed dissections of the human brain in college, did you notice that muslim minds were missing a few screws? if not, then perhaps you need to drop your theory about the "muslim mind". Also, unless you noticed in the course of your dissections that muslim brains have built-in intenna for wireless communication among the ummah, I suggest you consider reviewing your conclusions concerning a "vast muslim conspiracy to rule the world through numbers".

The truth is simple my friend. Alladin needs to be told to use his head (i.e. to think, I hasten to add), not just his reproductive organs, when proceeding to his next close encounter with his missus.

Re: # 63
dear charlie...please write to me on
welcome@drsohail.com
and we can arrange a get together one evening....
sincerely sohail

Re: # 72
dear parthaab..i do not mind you asking me personal questions. i chose not to have children for diffferent reasons. but i enjoy the role of parenting in two different ways. my sweetheart bette davis who has also been my best friend for thirty years had adopted a girl adriana in 1990 from romania when adriana was only 3 weeks old. so i enjoy the role of fathering indirectly. i also enjoy the role of uncle as my sister's children are like my own. these days my neice wardah is living with me in canada while my sister is in pakistan. that is why i feel that the role of mothering and parenting is not only restricted to biological parents. in my childhood also i recieved a lot of nurturing from my aunts, uncles and grandparents. sincerely sohail

Re: # 81; tahmed

you are shooting the messanger matey; talk to Eklavya if you have issues with the theory as I never claimed any ownership of it.

as far as loose screws are concerned, I leave that to people's individual judgements.

if you must know, there is nothing worse than indoctrination of children; we have ample example of the end-products right here (again individual judgements as above..)

as you would say, live long and ........

Re: # 81;

P.S.: I take it you know the difference b/w "brain" and "mind"? may be Dr Sohail can help you understand the mind-part and its loose attachments etc...I only deal with the 'physical' in my professional capacity

Re: # 81; btw tahmed

whatever made you think a muslim would knowingly donate his/her body for teaching purposes!?

hamid writes "...... in one of my many informal studies i have found that the more and bigger the television sets, the fewer the number of children ..... as a matter of fact, people with hi-def plasma or lcd sets larger that 50 inches and home theaters have a maximum of two children ........"

That may well be true but its a factor of income and wealth i.e. economic class and the corresponding roles assigned to children.

Tahmed writes "The UN study was too polite to put it - but the fact is that those who have more kids are stupid."

So social factors according to this nitwit be damned, it is all about personal choice yet regardless of the personal choice of millions the fertility rates remain more of less constant in increase and decrease a society over time- telling us that the structure is determining the trend and not "foolish choices"- would this slave of the West like to similarly conclude about his white masters that when the population boom occurred in Europe or when the baby boom occurred in the USA those people were just being "foolish"?

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Re: # 9
Dear Motor-City Madman Ham-Damn2,

Do you have a question that I can answer? Sorry I can't help you procreate, for that you first need to have a decent woman as a wife.

Drain the mobile oil and replace it with real blood in your veins.

Peace.

Massaddi Mian:

What can one do with you when reason is too logical for you. I did suggest that you please learn economics from Chabriwala of Gujranwala. This is all about economics, and not about demographics or sociology.

Please get it. "It is economy, stupid."

Labor, Capital (including profits) and markets are three pillars of economics. Whenever any of the three are oversupplied, point of diminishing returns sets in. Your intellect too has crossed the point of diminishing returns, due to oversupply of “Go F_____ yourself”.

Be a man, and stop hiding behind "Go F___ yourself" when you have no basis to argue.

There is no such law of economics that the wealth flows from children to parents. When did you invent this nonsense? Whenever you get an urge to invent such nonsense, please watch Bollywood movies instead.

For your overloaded knowledge base, wealth must be created, by individual, family, community or nation. Else there is nothing to distribute and hence nothing to flow.

Is this too difficult for you to understand?

Let me continue, in any nation-state, whenever growth in GDP exceeds the population growth, as has been the case since World War II, kids will be richer than their parents.

Now can you tell me what may happen whenever the opposite is true? If you did not get it, the wealth has indeed flown from parents to kids in those cases and will continue to be so. Mughal Empire and other Islamic Empires are examples of such reversal.

I would not tax your overloaded brain, and therefore, will not go further to explain what were the drivers of growth and reversals at different stages in different parts of the world.

This applies at an individual level also. Many kids instead of growing their inherited assets have squandered it.

You must remove your seventh century blinders to see. Only Massaddi Mians of all colors in the world cannot see it.

Somewhere, I think, Tahmed sahib mentioned that people asked their servants to stop procreating, or else look somewhere else. That family reached a point of diminishing return and could not sustain more additions for various reasons.

Your fundamentals are very weak, Massaddi Mian. Please think about the point of diminishing returns of your intellect and immediately start offloading nonsense.

Do you realize that after this point “Less is More”, as Hamidm sahib will say in his management consulting lingo?

Re: # 78

tahmed,

.... i think you should visit pakistan one of these days and talk to (not at) the 'stupid' unwashed masses that you profess to love so much ......

.... you should go out for an early morning walk and talk to the family of five kids ranging from 6-12 picking through the trash ..... you should also stop by a roadside mechanic and have your tires rotated by a twelve year old grease monkey ..... how about stopping by a tandoor/restaurant for lunch and talking to the grimy little waiter ..... if you have the time, also talk to the ten year old girl who mops the floor while her mother does the dishes from your supper the night before ......... then, i think you should visit the ten year old carpet weaver whose tiny fingers are ideally suited for weaving double knots .... and while you are at it, how about taking a road trip to sialkot to pick up a couple of soccer balls and talking to the kids who make them .........

..... i haven't talked to shafqat, but i did tak to gul rehman who has five daughters ranging from 8-16 who work as domestic servants ..... since i am the proud landlord for a 'english medium and computerized' school i offered to pay for their tuition, books and uniforms - i figured i could get a discount from the retired army education colonel who owns the school which has over a hundred kids crammed into a fifty year old six room house ....... anyway, gul rehman who seems to be a better economist than you, set me straight with some simple math ...... according to him, his one room house in tulsa village costs him 3000 a month, his electricity bill is another 1000 and his food bill to feed seven mouths is 4000 a month (which inludes meat once a month) ..... he does not spend anyhthing on dry cleaning, dining out, clothing, movies and horse racing .......... the man is a cheapskate! ........ he has a pucca job as a mali at the ordnance depot and gets 4000 rupees a month .... after work he works as a mali at five or six houses that brings in another thousand or so ..... of course he gets yelled at for only showing up for an hour and not watering the petunias properly - he is a professional and considers that as a professional hazard ......... so where were we ?...... oh, so gul rehman tells me that he would love to send his daughters to school if i could show him how to pay his bills without the 5000 a month they bring in ...... i told him that he should eat cake instead of running after a seven rupee roti, but the man doesn't like cake ....... also his eldest was getting married in a couple of months to a cousin who made a decent living hanging from the door of a pindi-islamabad wagon all day long .....

..... since i am not very good at math and economics and all that other stuff, i gave gul rehman ten thousand rupees for the wedding and walked away with a clear concsience and also saved a hundred dollars a month .....maybe i will use the money to fix the school's leaky toilets that colonel sahib has been complaining about ...... i also avoided upsetting the social order and pissing off my siblings who would have had to look for domestic servants ....... as everyone knows, the biggest problem facing pakistan's civil society is not the cj issue, it is the shortage of good naukars .........

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OD'd-on-Ginseng-MahaHypocrite-Masadi: (no text to add).