Emerging Pakistan-U.S. relations

Pakistan: US did not warn of missile strike
By THE ASSOCIATED PRESS

Filed at 9:23 a.m. ET

ISLAMABAD, Pakistan (AP) -- Pakistan said Thursday it was not warned about a suspected U.S. missile strike in its northwest that came the same day a top American official assured Pakistani leaders of U.S. respect for the Muslim nation's sovereignty.

The reported attack Wednesday will likely fuel anger in Pakistan over a surge in cross-border operations by U.S. forces -- including a Sept. 3 ground assault -- that has strained the countries' seven-year anti-terror alliance.

Pakistan's prime minister on Thursday reiterated Pakistan's stand against the incursions. But while denying prior knowledge of the reported strike, Foreign Minister Shah Mahmood Qureshi indicated Pakistan's civilian leaders want to defuse tensions through diplomacy.

The Setting: large ornate ball room at the Pakistani Presidential House.

Players: gilani, kiyani, Zardari (pakistani)....Adm. Mullen, low level embassy staffer. (American)


Gilani: how was your trip?

Mullen: Oh..islamabad is close Mr. PM, it's in our viewfinder.

Zardari: I got Bilawal a viewfinder when he was 10. It had pictures of the seven wonders of the world.

Mullen: that's nice

Gilani motions to a young staffer: "thoRay keemay kay samosay ley aao..aur chai"

Kiyani: Adm. Mullen, our two countries have a long standing history of cooperation. It is distressing to see our people targetted by the US forces.

Zardari: I also had bought Bilawal a snowglobe once...it was very cute..with all the landmarks of Paris. Admiral sahib, have you ever been to Paris? You must...it is too good...toooo good


Adm Mullen: Err..yes I have Mr. President.
(looking at Kiyani)..General, we would like nothing better than to work with the Pakistani Gov't and the Military to stamp out the islamists that are operating within your territory and killing people in Afghanistan and other parts of the world. But we have gone down this road before...spent $10 billion to facilitate this with little success. We also now believe that your institutions have been fomenting jihadi activities while paying lip service to us.

Gilani: these samosay have too much oil...Zardari sahib...you should not take any...with Bibi gone...I am fearful of ur health...nawaz sahib said that to me the other day. He said.."Aisa na ho kay Zardari ko kuch bibi ki tarah ho jaye"...

(Pointing to the help) zardari sahib kay samosay meri plate mein daaldo.

Zardari: Admiral, we pakistanis just love snowglobes.just like the west. But there are some people in the tribal areas who don't like snowglobes. I don't think they have been to Paris either. Have you been there Admiral Mullen. I love Paris...I got my son bilawal a snow globe with all the landmarks of Paris in it. Did you know that Admiral.

Mullen: err..yes I did learn of that recently.

Kiyani: Admiral we are meat eating people, we will defend our honor and our sovereignty. We cannot have the US military encroach on our sovereignty! We will not stand for it. We are Pakistanis...do you even know what Pakistani means? It means we are Pure People. I have given orders to fire upon any american misadventure unto Pakistani soil.

Mullen: General we belive in the bravery of the Pakistani people and their desire to root out this evil of jihjad from among them. This means working together.

Gilani:(seeing that the general is a bit hot under the collar) Admiral, Gen Kiyani said "Pure people"...not "Brave people"...I think we should all be calm. (Points to the staffer)....thora roohafzah ley aao!!

Zardari: Yes Yes..let's not lose sight of the big picture. I am 10% sure that we can all get what we want. (winking at Kiyani)

Kiyani: Admiral, we need a solemn pleadge that we will be informed before any and all military incursions into our country. And our prior approval would be sought. All operations will be handled by the Paksitani military and the cost will be borne by you.

Admiral Mullen: General, we are committed to working with you to get this done.

(all of a sudden someone's cell phone rings. Everyone pulls theirs out...Gilani can he heard shouting "Haaallo....Haaaallo")

Admiral Mullen: It's mine gentlemen. Can I have some privacy. (He is ushered to a quiet corner of the room. )

Kiyani: Zardari Sahib, appki medications kahan hai?

Zardari: (now sitting without his shirt cross legged on the chair) I wish I could live inside the snowglobe...and have rooh afzah flavored ice cream from bertillon.

Gilani: Kiyani sahib, do you think the keema juice will comeout of my sherwani?

Admiral Mullen: Gentlemen, i just spoke to the President...and..

Zardari: (now making circles with the front strands of his hair..) I am a president..yes I am..oh yes I am...

Admiral Mullen: ..and he said that we should invide President Zardari to the White House along with you both to chart out a new course for our relationship.

Kiyani: That is all we were hoping for Admiral. So we have your assurance that there will be no strikes in Pakistan from US forces.

Admiral Mullen; We will work with you General

Gilani: this is fantastic...can we have some cake?

Admiral Mullen: Gentlemen thanks for you hospitality, But I have to be going. (Picks up his cell phone and says "Go")

Zardari, Kiyani and Gilani are visibily elated at the bounties that are about to rain from the sky.

Kiyani: Scotch gentlemen?

Gilani: cna we add some rooh af zah?

Zardari: I like Pizza


Twenty minutes later...Kiyanis aide comes rushing in..."the americans have bombed Bajaur again sir"

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Nothing much will change. Kiyani is new to the army chief's post and the US is yet to get a handle on him. Once that happens, things will be back to normal. The Predators will continue to prowl and US forces will continue to chase their targets across the Durand Line into Pakistan's tribal areas.

Madhvi,
You must have watched Indian movies, where some sub-villains will get paid by hero to do his duty, but actualy the villain will do harm to his employer by collaborating with hero's enemy ( main villain)...

Pakistani armed forces is now working as sub-villain in this entire drama. Now, as the drama unfolds, most probably Paki armed forces will receive more injuries than the Talibans/Jihadis/Islamists....
In another article, Mike was pointing to a report. While US Tomahawks were pounding Jihadi hideouts, it was found that some ISI officers also sacrificed their life with islamists (they must be now enjoying 72....)...