Twenty Thousand Leagues Under a Nightclub

I agree. This is an excellent poem. I admit that I had expected something else
(:)) but what I got was even better.

The desert poem was also excellent but a little
dry (heh heh)

Hey, this is a great poem ! Who said no one responded?

You paint such a horridly vivid picture of

the clubbing scene;) It`s not all that bad!

Some very original lines I liked.

``darts of supermarket love fly,``

``annonting prophets, dragging eyes by cruel hooks

to altars of profane dieties,``

But why the profane for these dieties?:)

Very descriptive.

Yaar, maza aagaya!

What a surprise. How could I have missed

this little gem?

Dragging eyes by cruel hooks to altars of profane deities. Indeed.

Daring. Daring to see is the very essence:

the very difference between the few and the mutlitudes.

Those who dare cannot be blinded.

Nigah-e-shauq kay karishmay jaari rakhaiN.

Bravo! Bravo!

Just a niche; every line is not a sentence and still starts in capitals. I understand Brodsky is the only one who creates such syntax but not wholly so (a lot comes from translations). Is there a particular reason for this? Still, excellent poem- WAH WAH!

doctor sahib,

`dekhna taqreer ki lazzat keh jo us ney kaha

mein ney yeh jana keh shayad yeh bhi mere dil mein hai`

Your poems are the fruits of an observent eye and a refined expression. Like a stone whirled at the serene lake of the mind, your poem is exquisitely and deliciously different. i`d only say that the nightclub concept is not new to me. I`ve looked at it for ages, but never looked at it that way! You`ve added a new perspective to a rusty outlook. It has a bitter tinge to its sweetness-the flavour that makes it a feast! so, when is the next poem coming??

best wishes,

Amber