With a drop

Your poem is great!

I like the part when you said:

Dreams, desires, longing

All in chorus

Thunder the space

With a hungry tale

Of a long ago

Hardly forgotten

Recalled with a drop.

the part when you say:

Sweeter than plums,

Slower than sunset,

is cute.

Aliya (7 years old)

Apologies:

Pls. read ``kabhi`` instead of ``jabhi`` in the second line of the couplet.

t

Hamidah:

Welcome to Chowk.

A fine and enjoyable first effort. Droplets can teach us a lot. Am reminded of that Urdu couplet, probably Hali`s:

Zindagi qatray ki sikhlati hai as`raar-e-ha`yat
Yeh kabhi gohar, kabhi shabnum, jabhi aaNsoo bana

(sort of loose translation..)

Journey of a droplet
reveals secret of life
as it changes
from a drop of tear
to a drop of dew
to a diamond.

You taught me a new word: ``tenebrous``. (Please correct the way you spelled it.)

As this is your first effort here, I would mention this. Do not be discouraged by the lack of responses. Chowkies are slightly lethargic when it comes to poetry. Unless there are certain trigger words that get them going --- you know words like sex (oral or written), islam (misunderstood or not understood), Kashmir
(free or occupied, ours or theirs --- eyeryone`s but Kashimiris` own)...they are content to read and move one.

rgds

t

Shankar #484 I assume I am one of the two Ahmed`s (there being no third Ahmed on chowk I recall) you include in your list of Pakis on chowk who helped you change your views on Pakistanis. Coming from you, that is a real compliment, so thank you for it. I too very much appreciate the bold stand you take for promoting peace and good sense among the Indian and Pakistani posters on chowk. I must say that I had already changed my views about Indians many years ago when I came to the US and soon realized that there were human beings like us behind that image of the ``Indian enemy`` that we had grown up with. Given the poor job our governments have done at resolving their disputes and establishing peace, it is I think up to ordinary people to do what they can to keep the lights of hope for peace and goodwill burning. There is too much misery among the poor people of South Asia, and too much that we can do to make that part of the world in the forefront of human progress, for us to waste our energies in squabbling with one another or trying to prove whose side God is on.

just read it for the first time - very nice work....will give further input after more readings.

regards

Thanks everyone for your comments and encouragement.

Zensufi i really enjoyed your story, it was certainly new to my ears (in this case eyes).

Rehanhasanansari, i havn`t been published in rangh, but i would like to know more about this magazine, if you can provide me some info.

thanks for pushing few buttons on your keyboard.

I appreciate that.

Hamidah

Dear friends:

On the home/front page of Chowk, there is a yellow box on the middle right hand margin (actually, the ``marginal`` writing ends there). That yellow box has an item ``speaker`s Corner``. Click on it and you can leave a message for the administration of the Chowk. I left one that I think, would interest all the current posters on the Chowk. Please read it (by going to ``replies`` of the ``Speaker`s Corner``), and if you agree leave a message of your own. Or, merely ``me too``. I hope most of you remember that post!

Sincerely,

A Gnostic

dear hamidah

this poem is like one of the best but i know u can do better..so keep up the good work and keep writing

desiboombastic

Very nice, indeed. Is it me or it`s the poem that makes one feel...melancholy?

Since the subject is water, what`s below may (or may not) relate to the peom.

The highest good is like that of water. The goodness of water is that it benefits the ten thousand creatures; yet itself does not scramble, but is content with the places that all men disdain. It is this that makes water so near to the Way.

From `Tao Te Ching`

You are not alone, Hamidah. We all live in fantasy. Sometimes, I want to believe that us and everything around us is nothing but Maya, an illusion.

Hamidah, that was a lovely poem, really well-written. I enjoyed reading it!

Hamidah - very nice play with words, thanks! I have this tapestry my mother`s friend gave me several years ago. The image is of a woman in a lovely costume, sitting with a pen and paper in hand.

The artist narrated the true story behind the tapestry to me as follows... there was a Persian Prince who loved poetry. He wrote a couplet and sent his men to kingdoms far and wide with a message, ``I shall marry the lady who can complete this couplet by the set competition date, and there is also a monetary reward in it for her.``

Hundreds of people heard about the competition and sent replies. One such person was, Zebunessa, a Mughal Princess famous for her poetry. For weeks she thought about the couplet but could not come up with a reply. On the last day to submit the reply, she was strolling through the bazaar with tears in her eyes frustrated because of the poem. She had just bought and used some kajal (mascarra) and a black dot of kajal from her eyelashes marked her lower eye. Then a tear drop fell down her eyes and stopped on that kajal dot. The tear drop engulfed the kajal and stopped without processing down her face.

Zebunessa was so excited about what she saw... she rushed home and wrote a couplet about that one clear tear drop of water and the black kajal it surrounded. She submitted the couplet and won the competition, but she refused to marry the Persian Prince... that is another story.

Well, this has been difficult to explain... hope you understood Chowk readers! :-)

=zensufi=