Bahr-e-Zulmaat

Bengali food aside, I anNy, as ministress of food (i dont want agriculture mr.sigalph), order that all alcohol be thrown into the beautiful rivers of kerala- and tank, pepsi, coke , thumbs up, naryal ka paani be made available for free to the entire population of roachistan.

anyone caught drinking from the river will be prosecuted. i will personally see to it.

Be careful of unintended consequences of bengalifying:

A) Every alternate road will be called Netaji Subhas Bose Road

B) Zero attendance in offices on football/cricket match days

C) One rally a week to

- protest globalisation

- show solidarity with the suffering people of

cuba, nicaragua, sal salvador, angola

- commemorate Stalin

- demand the right to build shacks on pavements

D) Large hordes of intrepid travellers clad in mufflers and monkey-caps, armed with fish curry and sondesh to overrun the countryside

E) Simple pleasures like shopping would be denied. You would have to go marketing instead.

F) Colleagues would be comrades

Not all effects are unhappy though:

A) Cops will be happy with a 2 Rs bribe

B) Men will actually give up seats for women in buses

C) You will get to see those 5p and 10p coins again

D) Rum will be king - displacing desi

E) Ayodhya will be solved instantly. It will become the local CPIM party office

F) Sale of umbrellas will increase

Stuka

You are lucky. Ever seen a goat`s head boiling in curry? Bengali non-veg cuisine is not for the squeamish.

While you are at it you can also try out the vegetarian mutton curry - favoured by the devout and the brahmins. Which is nothing but mutton cooked without onion or garlic, using loads of ginger and garam masala instead. And if you are looking for especially holy stuff, visit the shops around the Kalighat temple which sell meat from the sacrificial animals.

Re: Stuka

``Ssince Punjabi cuisine is universally loved, and Punjabi music is well known from Ludhiana to London, how about converting the entire subcontinent in to one big Punjab?``

Uhh, I love Punjabis and all but this is taking a little too far. Who wants a nation whose national breakfast is a butter soaked paratha and a gallon of lassi (as sold on highways out of Delhi)?

But the fish-head bit is pretty sick too.

Appoint a committee to develop an amalgam culture - taking only the best from each group and dropping the rest. But I`m afraid when it comes to sartorial senses, we will have to go all the way to Italy to find any inspiration.

Zafar bhai, it is na...a..a. nago na, karona bhabona.

I like Tahmed`s expression about poppy khet, I guess it can be bit modified. How about, ``Aji Poppy khete bin-ladener lukochuri khela, nil akashe ke pathale B757 er mela re bhai,lukochuri khela....

re stuka 139

Lets split it 50/50! The others are small minorities anyway, no?

Sutka,

May I humbly suggest a return to the only culture you understand - agriculture :-)

btw the most famous fish-head dish is called mudi-ghonto :-)

ALL OF YOU GUYS...who plan on converting the Indian subcontinent into Bangladesh, let mewarn you about the ating habits of the Bengalis. Tthey eat the head of fish. I was at this girl`s house onetime, and I asked her if I could grab something to eat. She gave me some fish curry and a few slices of bread. I swabbed the curry, and Ii see a goddamn eye staring at me..it was a fish head with the eye on it...Ii almost dropped the plate...and I asked the girl, it wasn`t even a mistake. They actually eat the head, and probably chew up the eyes ugh ugh

Ssince Punjabi cuisine is universally loved, and Punjabi music is well known from Ludhiana to London, how about converting the entire subcontinent in to one big Punjab??

Please consider...

Why not just rename the subcontinent as the ``Bengal Sub-continent``, the Indian Ocean as ``Lake Bangladesh``. Instead of denouncing us Pakis as Arab wannabes, Indian posters could denounce as Bangla wannabes.

Ref Eklavya #: 116

[I propose we sweeten the offer and throw in UP too. Or, is that a deal breaker, sigalphda?]

For quite some time, UP (United Provinces) was called the North West Province of the Bengal Presidency. So, the Bengalis have a historical claim to UP.

re zafar and tahmed

About the prospect of expanding the civilizing mission of the Bengali man(Also known as Manifest Destiny Part II), I have closely examined your well reasoned opinions. After much thought and prayer, it is my judgement that the interests of humanity are best served by appointing a three member commission consisting of a judge each from Dhaka, Calcutta, and London (ek goraa to hona chahiye na!) to submit a formal recommendation in three months. Once those recommendations are submitted, they shall be forwarded to the appropriate cabinet committee for further review subsequent to which a bill will placed in parliament.There we intend to let YLH, as minister responsible, shepherd it into some law. The cardinal point of the law will be to appoint a permanent three member commission of jurists to examine further the issue of civilizing...you get the idea.

I will issue this ordinance in a gazette extraordinary shortly.

Womens Being Whipped In Kabul...saw this horrific scene on CNN... a Burqa Clad Women being whipped.I am speechless...LET US SCRAP THIS RELIGION & PROPHET.. We will be better without it

Zafar #104 There we go. Teach Mullah Omar to sing ``Amaar sonar Afghanistan`` and Bangla folk songs like ``Dhan Katae, Fasal Katae`` (or suitable adaptations for Afghanistan, like ``poppy katae, khocha poppy katae``) and soon the man will be purring like a kitten. Teach him some classical dances, and he will form a cultural troupe of former talibans. Even ben laden might end his evil ways, shave off his beard, and get a real job.

re tahmed 130

``sigalph: Please incorporate Afghanistan (to be renamed West Bangladesh) too.``

Biharis would be tough enough to handle; I am sorry, but YLH will have to take the task of civilizing the Afghans.

Banjara. Thanks for reffreing me to the website to find the answers to some of my quetions...I screened through it very minutely but to my utter disappointment could not find any answers.I need to know wether all the points raised are valid and based on historical facts?? if so then what is the justification...I have a lurking fear that we have been taken for a ride for the last 1300 years..as a result muslims have become the lowest grade of human beings...in some cases worst than animals...go with a red marker on the world map and put a red spot wherever muslims are...there some commonology...they are backward uneducated..poor of the poorest..beggars..helpless...corrupt..cheat..and terrorist..and they are muslims..and most of them are namzis..Commonology is a good pointer???

sigalph: Please incorporate Afghanistan (to be renamed West Bangladesh) too.