My Life As A Chick Magnet

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re: Apparition

``There is something so sweet about platonic relationships that I wouldn’t give them up for the world.``

...good that you can handle it, but why do most single desi girls have a problem with this concept?...i`ve met many with whom i wanted to be just friends, but it never flew...they will either not hangout with you b.c. you`re not boyfriend material, or if they do hangout with you, you`re automatically the boyfriend...

re: Stuka

{{Drumz: My man, sure you can hang with RSax, me and Ylh when we go around NYC getting rejected by all and sundry. Only thing is we are equal opportunity rejectionists. We give all women the opportunity to turn us down regardless of race and creed. Agar aapko manzoor hai to theek hai. Most welcome.}}

...getting rejected is accurate, but definitely not by ``all and sundry``...if i am going to get shot down, let it be by some model-like blonde hotties...much easier on the ego...hehe...and definitely stay away from desi girls at bars...they are usually kookoo...

drumz, i have thought long and hard about the mouse`s predictment...me thinks, its very ratlike of the mouse to ignore the other mouse..its not nice...mouse needs to either tell other mouse he was engaged to his stupid uncles daughter upon birth, cant get into a relationship coz he loves his ma too much or something equally frightening..even a `u make me sick therefore i dont want to see u ever again` would be sufficient if somewhat cruel..but he shund ignore the other mouse ..ignoring is just not nice

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Stuka: You`re obviously speakin outta your azz. A whitegurl wouldnt turn down a cucumber let alone a Paki.

Just let me do all the talking (im sensing some of you have estroowng paakey Akkzants).

Here`s a taste...

``And you thought the ganges was big...``

``What are your thoughts on partition?``

``Flukk me if Im wrong, but is your name jawarharlal?``

On any given day that will get u more whitegurls then a stale hot dog left on a park bench.

PS: I will get extremely violent if any of you mention Jinnah.

``semiprecious #29: Name`s A-NOOP (WTF is Anand, hehe). Thanks for the nice things though....``

...OOPS...i`m so sorry...i was reading another article before yours by a guy with this name and well...anyway, apologies again...

Rsaxena: ``..i don`t mean to invite your wrath, so please have mercy in your response...but what exactly is wrong with dating white gurls?...``

Ill explain all the intricacies of that some day when we meet up at a toronto bar. Canadian weed is among the best in the world, and dont even get me started on the girls...

re: Apparition

``and sometimes you do get what you want and then you realize that you bit off more than you could chew .....``

or sometimes you get what you want but then you realize that that`s not what you really wanted after all .. been there too .. what a mad world it is ..

Anoop #38,

maybe in another life cute stuff :)

RSaxena:

.``..i don`t mean to invite your wrath, so please have mercy in your response...but what exactly is wrong with dating white gurls?...``

Damn, I`ve never seen you be so diffident. Bhai don`t you know that ``whitegurlz`` are responsible for genocide the world over ;)

Drumz: My man, sure you can hang with RSax, me and Ylh when we go around NYC getting rejected by all and sundry. Only thing is we are equal opportunity rejectionists. We give all women the opportunity to turn us down regardless of race and creed. Agar aapko manzoor hai to theek hai. Most welcome.

Reply anNy # 37

“if youll excuse the impertinence...before like all your teeth and hair fell out, did u have a wisdom tooth? mines coming out, i think, and the pain is just killing me..any tried and tested remedies u can prescribe?

Get all four taken out – you’ll be happier in the long run, and the remaining teeth in your mouth will be less crowded and easier to floss.

(I learned the hard way, which involved busting a wisdom tooth on take away from a cheap Chinese restaurant at the witching hour, but I don’t need to go into that, do I?)

Zafar

``Okay say you were a mouse. Youve chilled with another mouse for a few times and all of a sudden the other mouse has a crush on you and u dont feel the other way about the other mouse (I hope im being cryptic with the rodent references). Since your too much of a biatch to tell the other mouse no, you gotta resort to ignoring the other mouse. My bro told me to Say that Im gay``...

LOL! Why does all of it sound so familiar to me?

There is something so sweet about platonic relationships that I wouldn’t give them up for the world. I absolutely dote on my best friend .........who BTW is utterly sick of my sob stories...........but I can always bet on him making me smile regardless of the magnitude of my dilemma .........though I can be just as sure of the merciless teasing that follows ..........but there are tons of times when I pull him out of sticky situations too coz despite being straight he gets as much fan following in men as I do :)

This was hilarious and one of the most entertaining pieces that I have read on chowk in a long time. But just one quick question.......didn’t any of those girls ever help you out with anything.......wasn’t a single one around when you wanted to pour your heart out????? I kinda doubt that. And how boring life would have been without all these women........right????????????????

Anoop:

Very well written. Thoroughly enjoyed it. BTW you were on the right track at the end.......no need to change your strategy :)

later

-sac

Re RSaxena # 41

and sometimes you do get what you want and then you realize that you bit off more than you could chew .....