3 Haikus

Hello Zinnia,

Your meter of Haikus is wrong.
It should be 5,7,5 words or as in Japanese letters.

Nichiro

addenda:to post # 95---as a PS.

Before this recedes into the memory bank.

A confession:

I,hamzad afaqui wrote this haiku.Did not take more than 30 seconds.

Heck,even the Japanese name is a concocted one--kind of Japanese sounding.I made that up too---I hope & pray nothing offensive happened to Japani knower.

Actually I like this one by Koi Nagata:

A catfish laughs.

It thinks of other catfishes

In other ponds.

But for the rest us (including me) falling over to write haikus:

Haiku kai-ku bol

Teri-ku aur kuch ata bol

Aur na kar bore

tahmed saab

“saminashah #82 Glad you liked the Panjabi Haiku. What the heck, here comes another one starring not one but two good ole boys:

Janab Afaqu

Likhhan Panjabi Haiku

12-Singha nachhay

I took the trouble of making it 5-7-5 syllables, thus passing the grammer test for Haiku. Hope Hamzad and Aamir&Co appreciate this effort I put into immortalizing them in verse. And in Hamzad`s politically correct language too!”

….LOL…. ….guess you don’t have to worry about losing your day job….

To those who extended to me undeserved recognition,referring specifically by name:

``Thank you``----the mirror is really miraculous.It reflects the truth.

A sliver of moon

a silvern cloud

Silence is golden

Akira yashamoto

aicha:As You say sir!

How can MUsharaff just give away support for Kashmir .DO YOU THINK THIS IS BOOLYWOOD LAAGAAN MOVIE ,THAT AAMIR KHAN WILL PLAN A UPSET WIN OF INDIA BY WRITING THE SCRIPT .INDIANS HAVE BEEN WATCHING BOLLYWOOD MAKE BELIEVE ,FEEL GOOD,WISHFULL THING, MOVIES FOR FAR TOO LONG

saminashah #82 Glad you liked the Panjabi Haiku. What the heck, here comes another one starring not one but two good ole boys:

Janab Afaqu

Likhhan Panjabi Haiku

12-Singha nachhay

I took the trouble of making it 5-7-5 syllables, thus passing the grammer test for Haiku. Hope Hamzad and Aamir&Co appreciate this effort I put into immortalizing them in verse. And in Hamzad`s politically correct language too!

Prem - gotcha (i think) !! - aicha

re: saminashah

{How is Singapore?}

singapore`s hot-n-humid and characterless, as it has always been...but it doesn`t matter much b.c. i`ve been in the office most of the time...

{You know my previous comments were directed at the duo...}

phew, ok good..else i`d have to get off this board in a hurry...my poetic sensibilities extend as far as appreciating the rhyming of rap artists, but no further :)

hydra

WRITTIN ANY PLARgaRIZWED POEMS ORWORN AnY BURQAS LATILY ???!!!?????!!!??

Ref hydra #: 85

[DeliciousKarachi

DONT I HAVE A BROTHER

ISNT HIS WIFE BORN IN PAKISTAN]

Delicious Karachi, I am deeply sorry we seem to have inflicted a moron (hydra`s brother) on your country. I do hope Pakistan doesn`t grant citizenship to husbands of its citizens. We can deal with hydra and his household zoo better in India.

Ref hydra #: 76

[Dont try to mention dissociation personality ,etc etc pretending as professional when you didnt go to EVEN a 3rd world country med.School!!!!!!!!]

I wouldn`t go to med school anywhere, even in the First World.

All your answers can be found in the PDR.

Not so if you want to design the Golden Gate Bridge, the 747 jetliner, the Pentium chip or some elegant program. Or, write a haiku.

By the way, you do need one medical procedure performed on you.

Get your head removed from your a$$ where it has been shoved up.

Rsax,

How is Singapore? You know my previous comments were directed at the duo...

soysauce, aicha, urstruly

Let me take this op. to make my position clear...(can I ever resist?)

Interactors have the right not to like a poem or poetry; therefore if an interactor writes, ``didn`t do anything for me``, that`s cool. It`s an opinion and a legitimate one. I`d rather that happening, because it means the interactor is reading and trying to engage with the writing on an honest level.

If interactor B writes, ``this is sensual because...``, that`s interesting as well, because a lot of good things in life are sensual; using one`s senses. Drinking a glass of water can be a sensual act; the tactile feel of the glass, the coldish glass against one`s lips, the silk flow of water in one`s mouth...in fact, one would be false in not acknowledging that each day consists of millions of sensual acts.

Sensuality is distinct from sexuality; sometimes both work hand in hand. Other times sensuality is present, while sexuality is in another room checking the weather online. It would be ill-informed to confuse the two.

Sexuality is an undeniable component of many great poems regardless culture, time, or place.

There are a few Chowkies who are clearly uncomfortable with this kind of energy in poems posted by Chowk writers. Thats fine, whatever floats your boat...but to mock the poem, deny its accomplishments, craft and skill, say that the art form has no merit and then bait people who enjoy this art form with stupid comments; thats when I get igged.

Zinnia`s haikus were really good on intellectual, artistic, sensual, and sexual levels. These interpretations are all there, should the reader be inclined to make them. I just get annoyed by the cheap and stereotypical comments that the duo makes... guess they should be read for comic relief and pity their spouses...

My apologies if I offended anyone outside the duo...

re: saminashah

{because you don`t actually KNOW any haikus}

ouch, not so harsh please...i don`t know any haikus either :(

aicha # 75

aicha - here`s your quotation under Occam`s razor

``Don`t fatten.``

Aeisha dear - surely you jest !!

Tahmed,

You are rapidly becoming one of my favorite Chowkies...here`s another one inspired by the dyspeptic duo;

The toad! It looks like

it could belch

a cloud

-Issa

The following have been inspired by the Haiku posted by Afaqui #69:

Haiku likhhan Afaqui Sa`ab

Tay Yaad Karan

Kutay biliaN

...

Lecture daen lammay chowray

Tay Yaad Karan

Vialaayati cheekaan

...

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Samina - here`s a quotation for you (dont know any more poetry)

dont try to fatten the pig on market day

Trying to live by it everyday !!

aicha

Ahhh Afaqui Sahib,

Running out of haikus forced you to slip back into the mud? Pity you couldn`t think of anything more creative and that your sexual fixations continue to plague you. Oh wait a minute; perhaps you didn`t post any real haikus (and not that unfortunate mess you peck and post), because you don`t actually KNOW any haikus? Wouldn`t be the first time you held forth about something you didn`t know jack about...too bad; I thought the Japanese and Chinese were our anti-whiteman brothers...well almost; see the Koreans consider the Japanese occupation as a brutal occupation. And the Chinese concur, even though the Chinese have no shining track record when it comes to the intelligentsia and ethnic minorities (that would ``muslim`` to you, A. Sahib)...but this is all irrelevant, right? Eveeeeryhting is the White Man`s Fault...sheeesh...even teenage gangsta rappers in NYC are too sophisticated to try to pass that old trope off...btw, how is it that you are so knowledgeable about syphillis?

Singing, flying, singing

the cuckoo

keeps busy.

-Basho

Samina - have run out of ideas!! Will post when hit by inspiration - soon i hope!

Soysauce (from another board) - the more inane the better. Pls do continue sharing !! Some insight asto why soysauce and not vinegar - per`aps maybe ??



aicha

Ref DeliciousKarachi #: 59

[12-Headed Monster Studebaker aka Aamir,

Why do we Pakistani women have to listen to an Indian who seems like a traitor to his own country teaching us how we should behave?]

The hydra seems to have a severe case of personality disorder. He can`t abide the fact that as a minority Muslim in predominantly Hindu India, he actually got the opportunity to get an MBBS and make tons of money. This is in conflict with his belief that Hindus are out to kill Muslims. The cognitive dissonance causes him to deny that he got any justice in India. His situation is worse in that Pakistan won`t let him in. He is permanently located in a mental limbo with no chance of escape.

I would recommend a psychiatrist for him but the one resident in Chowk is a loony.

hamzad afaqui 69 - i think that is more than enough. Pls dont spoil it for all of us. I am hoping you will comply. Thankyou much !

aicha

One more Punjabi Haiku

(without any notes)

Desi kutti

vilaayati cheekaan

Salotree ainveen aakrray

[This haiku is very subtle & has layers of meanings within meanings.It is intended to arouse some deep-seated recessed traumas in some hearts & minds.A wide grin accompanied by a jerky scratching of the affected areas brings about a bliss which weans one out of inglisyphilis.If this does not cure it,then higher more potent dosage is also in store]

anNy,

e-mail me. My cyber address book is non functioning.

-s

aicha,

Sweety, Agent Pinkytoes is being worked on as we type, thanks for asking...Zafar`s got something in the pot and its long on humor...got any more haikus?

Heres one I like:

My arm for a pillow,

I really like myself

under the hazy moon.

(Buson)

Sadna

Thanks! Let me extend my admiration for your ``definitive`` sentence on another board...but then, it is quite expected. Btw, how are the studies going?

Ralph #63
PS: You are definately on the wrong side of the border. What do you mean `Hindus are generous`?? What is there for anyone to be generous or ungenerous in give-and-take among EQUALS?

samina - you are absolutely right ofcourse! Say how is A Pinkytoes??

soysauce - great going!! here`s one for you -

free your mind

the rest will follow

get your mind out of the gutter !! : )

aicha

Ralph #63
You got that backwards. The Bharat Ratna is given to only people like Bismillah Khan but it was given to people like Indira Gandhi also.

saminashah #62
These were good :)

A dog barking
at a peddler
peach trees in bloom.

-Buson


Oh owl!
Make some other face.
This is spring rain.

-Issa

Studebaker # 61

I dont post here because Hindu-Muslim fights arent my business, but looking at Studebaker and Farzana I am convinced that Hindus are a very generous people.

BharatRatna is India`s supreme national honor or decoration. It has been given to only people like Indira Gandhi in politics and Lata Mangeshkar in arts. Somebody should have not let Bharat Ratna Bismillah Khan be inconvenienced by bureaucrats, but reading Hindu-Muslim discrimination in this shows a sick mindset.

aicha-

Your interpretation can be anything you want it to be...don`t let anyone interfere in your shauk.

I actually enjoyed you input...

Afaqui Sahib

For every oreo, there is a Pakistani kebab servicing a Wahhabi.

A dog barking

at a peddler

peach trees in bloom.

-Buson

Oh owl!

Make some other face.

This is spring rain.

-Issa

Saminashah

I wasn`t at the best of my behaviour either so I apologize as well.

#53 aicha

The gurgle of the odiferous colored water

rendezvous with the soft bits of something,

Get your head out of the gutter! ;)

I know the meter is all screwed up. But this is all i could manage in under a minute.

Some Panjabi Haiku.

Majh naveen na kraana

basant dee patangaan vekho

kabootar mar mar jaandai nain.

[Translation(loose)and then explanation for the benefit of those blessed with an extra-ordinary IQ.]

Do not get the she-buffalo to studfarm

just watch the kites at basant

The pigeons(lovelorn)are dropping dead.

explanation:

[This haiku has deep deep meanings.The more you`ll focus on the screen the deeper the meanings would surface.I have myself been able to figure out the meanings to the level when I was in a stupor & a maid-servant in my house who insists that she is still my betrothed whacked me out of it(the stupor)----Later on she reminded me that I wrote it myself!After offering profuse thanks to my friends who called me a genius I also offered congratulations to myself.

With all the humility I can muster I must declare that I am simply the best.]

This haiku is lamenting the sordid & sorry condition of the third world.The deep deep blackness of the buffalo is a timely reminder to us that this is what we all looked like before those damn invaders from nowhere & everywhere managed to turn us into oreos.Then the poets` imagination soars and he instructs us to look upwards and appreciate the progress made by those who turned us into oreos but now are discouraging us to have any more sex(subtle hints of eroticism & sensuality) and because of such a spectacle, as a technicolor Lahore sky during basant festivities(camaflouged daisy-cutters),the peace doves are pining for the beloveds who betrayed,and are commiting hara-kiris in droves,en masse.

__________________________________________________

A friend e-mailed me an even higher level interpretation & he claims that this is almost the nth degree interpretation.He swears that after becoming almost hynotised looking at the screen it all started making sense to him.Pictures suddenly emerged in 3-D,like those computer generated hologryphs(?) in vogue till recently.

He refused to divulge those interpretations, because he is afraid,that that might entice all those at the nuclear play-stations,play it for real money.

Thank you my friend.

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Semiprecious

You are right, I stand corrected.

Cheers,

Faisal

hai hai Samina - after reading your interp of Zinnia`s last ku - I have decided to nip this newfound shauk in the bud. I actually went straight for the gullet and thought it was all about sex : ) but that isnt a buri baat is it?

aicha

Urstruly,

Perhaps my post was unduly hostile to your post; in retrospect your post was not as eggregious as Afaqui Sahib`s or the hydra`s`; so my apologies if I upset you.

If you don`t mind answering a question: please go back and read Afaqui Sahib`s and the hydra`s post. Do these posts reflect a willingness to engage in a non-judgemental, non censorious way with the haikus that Zinnia presented? Can you not see how this is a very male, controlling response?

The last haiku could be a metaphor for the narrator`s desire to communicate/engage in a borderland of nondelineated, inbetweeness. The object is the tongue, the instrument of orality, voice, spoken thought and interaction. ``Your mouth in exile``: the inability of language to represent thought, experience, the ``invisible world``.

Or, speaking from a place of exile where other people also in exile speak.

Kind of like Chowk. I`m sure there are a number of interpretations that could be expressed in an intelligent, mature manner.

Urstruly,

Perhaps my post was unduly hostile to your post; in retrospect your post was not as eggregious as Afaqui Sahib`s or the hydra`s`; so my apologies if I upset you.

If you don`t mind answering a question: please go back and read Afaqui Sahib`s and the hydra`s post. Do these posts reflect a willingness to engage in a non-judgemental, non censorious way with the haikus that Zinnia presented? Can you not see how this is a very male, controlling response?

The last haiku could be a metaphor for the narrator`s desire to communicate/engage in a borderland of nondelineated, inbetweeness. The object is the tongue, the instrument of orality, voice, spoken thought and interaction. ``Your mouth in exile``: the inability of language to represent thought, experience, the ``invisible world``.

Or, speaking from a place of exile where other people also in exile speak.

Kind of like Chowk. I`m sure there are a number of interpretations that could be expressed in an intelligent, mature manner.

Zinnia or the Chowk staff introduces to the poems ``Love poems inspired by the cycle of nature``.

Could someone plz tell me what the heck is cycle of nature? Only one thing comes to mind by this phrase but then why do we have to listen to it in a public forum. What the hell have we done to deserve it?

Saminashah

What would have been an interesting, intellectual and intelligent discussion is lost to the hostility-thanks to your first post. Next time you try to defend something keep in mind that this is interactive forum and I have every right to ask writer or any other person why he wasted my time or has he/she?

Aamir - You are wrong about the reasons. I like haiku because of its simplicity. Anything I cant get in a couple of secs is a waste of my time - which is what poetry/shaierree is. Personally that is the very reason I skip mushaira`s where everything is so hiflown&complex.

And re you getting flak fro your comment - your reputation precedes you and whatever you say.

anNy - Glad you like but cant take credit for it : )

aicha

Hakiu)

re: hydra

“MUSLIM WOMEN LIKE nAHID ,mARIAM,& HUMA ,FARZANA ,KIRAM,SHIREEN,AnnY ,sEMI PRESCIOUSNOUS,EVEN bINNIFER ,ARE EMPOWERED WOMEN.”

….excuse me while i snort and interrupt your sanctimonious bs….but what’s the number of times you’ve accused me of not being a muslim?…

Thirteen Ways of Looking At a Blackbird

Among twenty snowy mountains

The only moving thing

Was the eye of the blackbird.

-Wallace Stevens

My old man`s ears-

summer rain

gurgling down the drainpipe.

-Yosa Buson(1716-1783)

Kept by the winter wind

From falling to earth-

The drizzling rain.

-Kyorai

snoopy, aap dhitaee aur besharmi ka behtareen namoona hain

Faisal

“The classic form is 5 then 7 then 5 syllables to make a total of 17. Maybe I didn`t read carefully, but did you follow that structure? “

….maybe i’m mistaken, but it seems to me the 5-7-5 syllable pattern is there….

samina:

....to steal an anNyism...yew rwock!

Salam

The american muslim girl

With prodding from her mom greets

H(a)i_ku da hafiz!

re: saminashah

{{``FOPrjafhieG86tl all yoU boOtlivCKers whio lioke MAipaul, and peoms of godless HINDIANS adn LESBleians adn KSIsising! my bEst wisheses`` . }}

haha...i just burst out laughing at the singapore airport...now i`m getting funny looks...

Snow on hills

Dust on plains

Sayonara taliban

...

God in heaven

talib in caves

Sayonara mullahs

...

Campfires

Nuclear savagery

Aurigato leaders

...

Sayonara is ``bye bye``

Aurigato is ``thank you``

And this last haiku is all screwed with too many syllables, too many words, no reference to seasons

What the heck!

It`s not very often I see poetry being shared here at the Chowk. Think I`d better jump in quick with my own contribution before the spirit runs dry. ;)

This is another one by Basho.

Sick on a journey -

Over parched fields,

Dreams wander on

Matsuo Basho (1644-1694)

Aamir

hydra

re: your comment on female circumcision

Aparently you are the product of an extensive one and a lobotomy as well. Would explain a lot.

snoopy/hydra,

1. How many nicks do have now? Add Snoopy and Glen to them. You seem to know no bounds in taking advantage of the liberalism of the Chowk Staff and community. Your excuse for your behavior (which should be a category in the DSM IV) is that one nick cannot contain your multiple personalties. Therefore you pretend to be Bangladeshi, Pakistani, Indian, Hindu, Muslim, American, female, male, and a practioner of various professions. You also claim you are married and have children, but apparently deluged anNy`s e-mail with 25 messages a day. (as reported by another Chowkie). Mashallah, what a good Muslim husband you are!

2. If you don`t like someone`s poetry, why don`t you keep it to yourselves? You don`t have to write a lewd, incomprehensible response or post endless articles-these tactics are all ego related; its a way of whining for attention-``look at me! look at me!``. Children do that; its much less tolerable in supposed adults.

3. Speaking of lewdness, why do so many of your posts make purile, oily, sexual interpretations? If someone wrote: ``The night fell around me like my lover`s hair unbound``, undoubtably you`d respond with something like ``FOPrjafhieG86tl all yoU boOtlivCKers whio lioke MAipaul, and peoms of godless HINDIANS adn LESBleians adn KSIsising! my bEst wisheses`` . Have you heard of the idea that a poetic metaphor is often referring to another thing entirely? No? Then why embarrass yourself?

You ruin any kind of mature discussion for the rest of us and its really sad to the writer and readers.

4. I was particularly interested in the whopping lie you told on another board; you wrote that you have worn a burqa. I don`t believe you. You have absolutely no credibility as an interactor as far as I am concerned. But what can I say, courage, convictions, ethics, tolerance, truth; these are all games in your house of funny mirrors brain...

5. I feel really sorry for you.

aicha:

LOL

zinnia:

i didnt know what a haiku was before this..thank you!

p.s: i think i know you from school

a haiku shaiku dedicated to Molko,

Molko

Blend

milk yolk

and o

Molko #27,

those were beautiful, i especially liked the second one...

i think i`m beginning to like this haiku stuff

Zinnia

Was ignoratn of haiku till now. This got me interested enough to dig into the details and I ran into one haiku careof ..(i forget the authors name - careless yes) am reproducing it here

Pregnancy

thinking of the technique

relatives smile

What a neat way of expression !!

aicha

Haiku

First two lines set up scene

The third spings a surprise

Haiku dos for cleverness!

Zinnia,

I like the Haiku form, but like many of the people on this forum, I could not fully appreciate the one`s you wrote. Maybe they are not absurd / disjoint enough, if that is a literary argument. It would be interesting to see more work from you... keep writing!

The classic form is 5 then 7 then 5 syllables to make a total of 17. Maybe I didn`t read carefully, but did you follow that structure?

Something from the master of Haiku, Matsuo Basho

as I clap my hands

with the echoes, it begins to dawn --

the summer moon

Cheers,

Faisal

Afaqui Sahib,

You are a sad little man. Good luck with your life.

Urstruly,

What must be explained to you? What is so obscure and esoteric about these poems that you need someone to spell it out?

Historically, haikus have focused on nature, seaons, times of day and in recent times have been expanded to encompass themes of urban life, diaspora, etc. Again it is saddening that you and the hydra are so uncomfortable by what is an

ancient Asian form that, in the hands of the Japanese and Chinese masters, are undeniably sensual and can be interpreted in many different ways.

``The haiku is philosophically an outgrowth of Zen, Buddhism. Haiku translated into English tend to appear, to Western eyes, overly sentimental and to fall victim to the pathetic fallacy-overstated personification. We do not understand that the Zen poet is trying to out him/herself into the place of the thing preceived, empathizing with the inanimate object. Moreover, the Zen poet is trying to become one with the object and thus all things.

The haiku has perhaps been best described as ``A moment of intense perception``. William Carlos Williams enunciated the American-British doctrine as ``no ideas but things``. Both conceptions are, if not identical, at least quite similar, for both are based on the sensory level.`` L. Turco

Now, I have spent a few minutes typing this response out to you, because it seems that there are some interactors who need to sully the boards with ridiculous sexual innuendo everytime they see a poem that might be slightly sensual. I feel this is a mechanism of stereotype and repression. Do you understand, Urstruly? What is even more astounding is that there are some interactors that are so immature, that a reasonable discussion of sensual themes or allusions are impossible. We get idiotic posts about French kissing, or female anatomy. Considering that there are a lot of writers who log onto Chowk, it is dissapointing, and more than little pathetic.

Snoopy #10:

Who gave you the right to ask samina for an explanation for her likes and dislikes? Aap unki phoopi kay puttar hein? Hein bhi to who cares! Quit acting like the dumbo you labeled yourself. Be nice.

Ugh, lately I`ve been telling too many ppl. to be nice. :( What a headache.

3 poems for Scout

Beer

Beer

It makes me feel queer

But not homosexual

Women

Women

They`re not men

Poetry

Poetry might be pretentious shite

But then, it might not

Snoopy #10:

Who gave you the right to ask samina for an explanation for her likes and dislikes? Aap unki phoopi kay puttar hein? Hein bhi to who cares! Quit acting like the dumbo you labeled yourself. Be nice.

Ugh, lately I`ve been telling too many ppl. to be nice. :( What a headache.

Karakoram # 23

LOL...

Zinnia,

MMMMMMMMM good.

It is very important to note that if this stuff is called Haiku the value of acceptace soars on the Naikii index.

If same stuff is called a cee-harfee(faarsee) then the intellectual foreplay gets ruined.

If it is called tappa(?) ``Chitta kukr banairay tey``(example) then the cultural orgasm somehow disappears in a slimy abyss.

__________

Rubaayees,Chaupaees,dohaas are never written in the english language.The reason is very simple.They work like lemon and tarts on a drunkard & like cold-water sprayed on an afeemee(opium-eater).

In order to increase ones` competence & comprehension of the masters` lingo one MUST never eat paan(gum definitely helps),admit love for Islam(kanjar attire helps),Act Phorren(thanks urstruly---yes helps),Visit India & Pakistan and get over-awed by the exoticness.

You see how easy it is to master this language?Those who graduated from Osmania Urdu University in the english language;never went to Phorren school;are working in top editorial board positions with the best phorren newspapers the world over,talk with Indian/Pakistani ``accent`` & are damn proud of it,are held in awe by those who matter,eat paan wear kurtaa,look maulvi like-----No No No you do not understand! they are not what the kanjars are.It is different,unexplainable,but different.

After reading Urstruly`s interpretation of the first one, they all suddenly made sense to me.

The last one is particularly erotic.

Go figure.

# 18

No I really truly didn`t understand `this` poetry and read my lips-I didn`t say `this kind of poetry`. And I see, on this board, that I am not the only disappointment.

I would have asked you to explain to us what you have understood but I can bet my ass that you will play ``emperor is naked`` tricks with us-(given the history and style of your interactions).

Molko #17,

no actually i just pretended to like it so you wouldn`t yell at me for expressing my disdain for cryptic poetry again... ;)

Snoopy---#7

Please do not be so demanding.

There was an Pakistanee Urdu movie where Rangeela(the great comedian) gets sandwiched in a discussion between two scholarly types.The argument started warming up.When one guy finishes,Rangeela authoritatively agrees with him & says ``You are absolutely right`` & does the same to the other side as well.Both get the impression that Rangeela fully comprehends what they are talking about----until!

You can guess the rest.

PS:Some convent/mission type Pakees buy books with covers matching their bedroom curtains.It take all kinds to make the mare go.

Snoopy

Sometimes I read posts that are so clueless that I am convinced that they have been written by the hydra. Yours falls into that category. therefore, I will not be wasting my time.

Urstruly

I generally stay away from work I cannot contribute meaningfully to. Its a shame that you don`t have the courage, intellect or spirit to tolerate forms of writing that do not correspond to your own personal tastes. Yet another disappointment...

Scout - can it be? We both liked the same poem!

There`s hope for you yet.

i actually understood the middle one, must be my lucky day

short poems are good.

Welcome to Chowk Zinnia:

These were well-written; enjoyed ``Morning`` and ``Ripe.`` I think for the next time, maybe you need to add more space between the different pieces, will improve the layout of your works.

Regards,

Kiran

Taste

Ocean dressed in red

Dripping on yellow, white and green

Pass that soysauce please

Welcome to Chowk Zinnia:

These were well-written; enjoyed ``Morning`` and ``Ripe.`` I think for the next time, maybe you need to add more space between the different pieces, will improve the layout of your works.

Regards,

Kiran

Urstruly Reply #: 12

wow, good going urstruly. i dont even understand that one! ahhh... everything thing is not for everyone.

Dear Zinnia and other poetry lovers:

Plz forgive my uncouth comment but imagine my frustration that I could only understand one out of three Haikus i.e. ``Morning``.

The ``Ripe`` reminds me of a recently shown Madhhuri Dixit movie on Z, titled ``Koyla`` in which she played a village girl in her early teens, with a pot belly and very aggressive breasts.

The ``Fantasy`` makes me queasy, I dont know why?

I must apologize again but that is how I feel most of the time when I read poetry at Chowk. May be I am poetry impaired but then again I understand everything that Zehra Rizvi writes.

Scout! More `not so profound` poetry!

Nice stuff. Like `Morning` best.

Welcome.

#: 7

saminashah

Dear Zinnia,

Nice work! Fantasy particularly rocks...

S

why?

EXPLAIN.

anybody can pretend like you .

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Subtle, sensitive and very beautiful. Thank you Zinnia.

Aamir

Dear Zinnia,

Nice work! Fantasy particularly rocks...

....ahh, haikus...here the japanese really did get it right....i really liked the last one....

good stuff. hope to see more of your work on chowk.
shandana

Zinnia:

Ripe, bright, sensual...and crisp and caressing.

Aamir:

Would you have asked Ghalib why he wrote, ``Yoon to main bhi mooh mein zabaan rakhta hoon``? Kabhi to sharam karein aap...sometimes you quote such wonderful things and then you end up with this. If the poet wanted to be obvious, then verses would not be necessary. Samjhein?

sigh. beautiful feelings.

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Three reasons why Haiku is a wonderful way of expressing feelings.
Welcome to CHOWK Zinnia. We hope to see more
from you.

Ras