Nasreen

You guys are being extrememly harsh on the author. Granted that his piece probably sounds so much better in Urdu, it wasn`t so bad in English. Yes it was a bit lenghty but it still did a great job of capturing the central idea.
For those of us who cannot read Urdu, this version isnt so bad.
Nice job Godot!

simple story of practically every other girl, nothing new. But nice of u to do the translation godot.

and no baba, I am not nooralain. uffffffo.... kitney baar samjhana parey ga.. :(

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Godot:

Yaar you have compromised Quality probably with Quantity in this one. Shafiq is one of my fav, he deserved better.

Literal translation is for scientific and historical journals only. It kills the light humor - a big no no.

Dont get dishearted though.

apologise for the digression; are LadyAna and nooralain the same person? sort of confused with this double id thing...

aamir

soundmeister...you are a troublemaker :)

``Fair enough. So you did not think that this was a good translation, that I did not capture the essence and soul of the story. I think I did.``

``Thanks for the tips, though. When translating, I stick to all 5 points listed.``

Temporal-bhai, bhool jaaiye. The self-proclaimed genius knows all. Who are we mere mortals to offer criticism?

I liked the tips though. Thanks
SM

godot...i have not, unfortunately, because somewhere in the process of moving as often as i have within these past two years...i have misplaced the copy of `Aik Mohabbat Sau Afsanay` that my mother brought back for me sometime ago...i plan to search for it in earnest this weekend...if not, I own a novel written by his wife (I`m not sure that it`s one of her better ones) that I plan to attempt to translate.
I wonder if there is anyone here who lived in Pakistan in the early seventies when AA`s AMSA was being interpreted on PTV. They were quite good realizations, I thought.

Glad that you are neither defensive nor discouraged...and that you know yourself as well as you do :)

noor, #28
I`m neither defensive nor discouraged. I know myself. I did a good job with this translation. Of course, not everyone`s going to like it. There are people who can`t even relate to this story (it makes it even tougher to like it then.) I respect others` opinion, as long as they polite, and they do not necessarily have to be in my favor. But this translation stands, and I stand by it.

And you certainly will see more translations from me. Thanks. [I hope you have started working on Asgfaq Ahmed`s also.]

temporaloo...are you referring to an essay by Gregory Rabassa, who did quite a few Garcia-Marquez translations..or is it another translator?

godot baba...i`m sure his remarks were not meant to discourage you, or make you go on the defensive (arre, that`s what i do, ji!!!)

digressing as always...but his words remind me of my French poetry class...reading Baudelaire`s famous `Les Fleurs du Mal` and underlining every word of French I did not understand, and writing their literal meanings in English...Mme. Francoise saw that and told us we should rely more on our senses and not our dictionaries. I did not last very long in her French Poetry class :(...if there was a point to recalling this memory, i certainly can`t remember what the point was...but anyways...am looking forward to more translations from you.

temporal, #26

Fair enough. So you did not think that this was a good translation, that I did not capture the essence and soul of the story. I think I did.

Thanks for the tips, though. When translating, I stick to all 5 points listed.

Godot:

...friends who know how much this subject interests me have written enquiring why have not commented here…

…simply put…my idea of ‘translation’ is to not only translate the literal ‘meaning’ of a piece of prose or verse, but also to translate its soul or ‘essence’…so the reader who is not familiar with the original language would get a ‘feel’ of what the original must have been…

…thought it would be helpful if you read an excellent essay i had by one of the translators of Garcia Marquez…but have misplaced it and am searching for it (kiran, samina help?)...meanwhile here are some basic tip by Jennifer…even though this primarily deals with poetry perhaps you will find this helpful in your next effort?…

rgds,

t

_________________________________________________________

Five Tips on Translating Poetry

by Jennifer Liddy

You`ve decided to translate a poem. Maybe you have been studying a foreign language your whole life and want to put your talents to good use. Maybe you just came back from vacation to an exotic country and fell in love with their national poet and you want to recall the romance. Either way, translating poetry is serious business and not to be taken lightly. Your job as a translator is not only to pass the meaning of the poem into another language but to respect and honor its spirit. I don`t mean you need a seance with a thousand candles, begging the poem to breathe your page. I mean that there are some rules to respect when you translate a poem.

1. Stay Close to the Poem.

Read the poem again and again until the words become second nature on your tongue. By doing this, you will be able to feel the rhythm of the poem. You will recognize the pace, the pauses, the beats, the swirls of energy. Write the poem in longhand and make ten copies. Stick these where you can see and read them. Try the bathroom, the kitchen cabinet, or the freezer door, leading to the Ben & Jerry`s. These copies will familiarize you with the poem`s grammatical structure: Where the adjectives are, where there is a break in tenses. Plus, if you put them on that package of Oreo`s, it`ll take you longer to gobble the bag down. You will have to read the poem first!

2. Know the poet.

If you are lucky enough to pick a living poet to translate, write to him or her. Get to know the person; ask him or her questions about the poem. What was the poet thinking when writing the poem? What does the poet think the poem means? Is there any imagery or language that is repeated? Is there anything symbolic from his or her life? What does the poet think of poetry? The more you know about the poet and his or her life, the better able you are to understand the nuances of the poem. Be courteous and grateful. The poet is answering your questions to help you with your translation.

If, however, you choose a poet who has passed on, your job is a little harder. Try and find out as much as you can about the poet`s life. Most countries have national writer`s associations. If they don`t, check the web and university libraries and language departments. Maybe from there you can find other people who knew the poet or can help guide you. Build as many contacts as you can. Be familiar with the poet and you will get a sense for the poem.

3. Go for Grace.

When you translate a poem, your job is to stay as close to the meaning as possible. That said, you also have artistic license to use (not abuse) the meaning to make a clear and graceful translation. Translating slag is an excellent example of when to use artistic license. Some slang has absolutely no meaning in another language. In fact, a direct translation would make the poem fail. In that case, turn the meaning of the slang into its equivalent. Remember, you want readers in your language to enjoy the poem, not marvel at how well you can directly translate words.

4. Be Wary.

This tip is for those of you who think translating takes a few minutes tops. There are some great computer programs that are designed for translation. There are also some excellent dictionaries and phrase books. But do not rely on them to give you the end-all-be-all translation. You must do the footwork. You can use these computer programs and dictionary translations as a guide. They may help get to the bones of the poem but your job is to put heart and live language on those bones.

5. Take a Deep Breath.

When you finish a translation, sit tight for a few days, maybe even a week, before you go over it. Take some time to think about something else, in your own language. Then come back and see where the gaps and the goodies are.

Translating a poem is a lot like writing a poem yourself. You have to know what you want to say. You have to feel what you want to say. You have to be focused. There are a thousand other jobs that are easier, better paid, and eyesight-saving, but translating has its own glories. Putting poems into another language is one of the best ways to share culture, honor poets, and remind us that we can transcend geography. Do your best.

Gidiot
I have neither the time nor the energy to argue with menopausal old lechers. My single point is you are bad at translations because you do it so literallly that it makes no sense standing alone.
I STILL don`t get the donkey references. I thought it was PIGS that were unislamic.
Anyway, keep writing. Nice thing about the new chowk is it`s so hard to find anything, so I can lose your stuff easy.
Muchas Smoochas
SM

...godot…interesting story…but, because it was a literal translation, it didn’t really gel in some places…