Sex in the Indian Family

the article is excellent.It dwells on the compexities that sex pose to us.A very readable article,indeed.

yes dost-mittar -- ``Dariba, Chandani Chowk, Turkman Gate, Sadar, Bara Hindu Rao and Fatehpuri`` -- Dariba KalaN, Billi MaraN, Pahargunj, Mehrauli, Okhla...

rahta hai dil qareeb watan ke watan se dooor
iss anjuman me hai magar iss anjuman se dooor

gurche rahaa hai zeenat-e guldasta-e farang
murjha geya hai phool yeh ruh ke chaman se dooor

shammi miaN
the correct e-mail address whirlwindww@aol.com

STUKA!!!!!

I am in Delhi (ok, in Palam Vihar, Haryana....) till Dec 21, except for about ten days at the beginning of Dec when I`m in Bombay/Pune. Gimme call on 636 9395. Use the Harayana area code (look it up in book :-)). Talk soon!

Dost-Mittarji - aap bhi haiN, na, Dilli meiN? I seem to recall some Bengali Market type plans....??

mere aziz shammi miaN

clean, wide roads, tranquil, languorous evenings -- dimly lighted electric poles -- tongawallas with decorated horses tap dancing on the asphalt -- well dressed, , diverse people -- from dhoodh wale to chai wale -- sikhs, Hindus, Muslims, Christians -- living side by side in harmony -- there was a German lady called Apa Jaan associated with Jamia Millia -- all kids loved her -- she was imprisoned briefly during war by the British but released when Jamia protested -- that was Karol/Qarol Bagh before partition –

after partition -- never visited it again -- too painful. Just trying to keep some of the pre partition pleasant memories alive – chuth geya daaman-e bahaar-e watan/ ruh gaieeN haiN bahaar ki baateiN –

may be one day with you and dost mitter ji -- I will try visiting the old place.

shammi miaN -- u had some new pictures of the masjid – if u still have them – can you e-mail a few at the following address – whirlwind@aol.com – lots of thanks my friend.

Willtell you what happened to us after parition -- a painful subject -- some other time.

nasah:
How was Karol Bagh like in those days? How does it compare with today? When was the last time you were back? Thanks

re: 12-head

...you mentioning shabana azmi`s name is like hitler singing a lullaby...goddamn freak...

In Karolbagh in the 40`s there use to live a respected Hakim saheb –

in a Chai Khana by the nooKKar of the masjid – one day I heard him explaining Conception on a cup of hot tea -- to his mohalle wallas –

the learned Hakim said pregnancy can occur ALSO by -- the heat of the two bodies – badan ki gurmi se -- if a male and a female work in close proximity -- without sex –

Interestingly a week later -- the mohalla was rife with the rumor that the Hakim saheb`s young maid was pregnant!!! – to my utter disappointment nobody seemed to believe the Hakim’s -- badan ki gurmi concept --

But -- 60 years of Indian ‘safe sex’ movies – of repetitious song & dance routines -- have repeatedly proved -- beyond a shadow of doubt -- that Hakim Saheb was – not off the mark.

I wish our Hakim was alive today to see himself proven sooo right about Indian Sex -- by his Indian movie makers --

badan ki gurmi does make babies -- for Indian film stars:-)

dost-mittar (#15),

Admit it, you`re getting old (like me) :-). I grew up during Rajesh Khanna/Amitabh Bacchan`s heyday and I remember how my elders used to speak so fondly about Guru Dutt, Raj Kapoor et. al.. Even Chief Executive Musharaff said the same thing during an interview.

One thing though, most of the drivel dished out today is designed to shake the reluctant paisa out of your pocket. And since there is so much drivel emanating from Bollywood, gems in between them are harder to find.

Seems like an interesting movie.

Ras

I really enjoyed `The Graduate`...it is one of my favorite movies of all time...and it was about more than just sex. As I suspect Leela is as well.

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Sex sells; it is simple as that. Plus any tut poonjia can make a movie about gays, perverts, and desi having on-screen sex but it takes a genius to make a movie like ``Gaddar``. It was the art interacting with living breathing life, immitating life, motivating people to pull Gujrats.

But anyway I hate Indian movies regardless, especially those made in English where characters quack English language like ducks.

re: #6
[ ... Your idea is so old I can think of at least 5 movies...how many can you name that uses mine? Titles, please. ...]

Saminasha, my bad. When I was thinking about those movies I was including Indian movies also (as much of the desi diaspora has at least some exposure to Bollywood.) Watch any Indian movie, and you`ll see rich Vijay (a Khan in real life) visiting his haveli 50 km. west of Delhi, after growing up in vilaayat for 20 years. In the haveli, everyone is super rich and singing, dancing and partying like there`s no tomorrow ... and, in the end there`s a wedding that will put Bill Gates to shame.

As for FOBs having it easier than ABCDs, I never meant to imply that they are harder working than ABCDs. Sorry if it came out that way.

Aamir, the movies you mentioned depict desi life in England. The American-desi experience is unique in its own way.

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...why do we even need more desi movies for international audiences?...why not shut the garbage door for a while?...

I kind of have to agree with Adnan.. what a cliche theme for a movie, its the desi version of the Graduate. Fine our cultures aren`t as open to sex, but with all of these movies coming out where the center revolves around it, its to say that the other topics in our society are over looked.. Samina is right, how about the FOB v ABCD topic, elitism in our society, superficiality overcoming intellect..

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Your idea is so old I can think of at least 5 movies...how many can you name that uses mine? Titles, please.

And by sepia colored I mean idyllic....I`d like some FOBS to come over to where I live and see how easy it is...(i.e. its not)....

Cliche, hunh? So, how many movies have been made on this topic to this date? As for the upper class community partying hard, their numbers are so small that they`re almost negligible. Besides, the whole idea of FOB parents raising their kids on ``sepia toned version[s] of Pakistan`` and the kids getting the shock of their lives upon visiting their parent`s birthplace has become a cliche in itself, don`t you think so?

#3

As if that plot was not a cliche in itself....here are some new and authentic twists:

How about an ABD who goes home to Pakistan to find that amid the 80% impoverished class, there lives a middle and upper class community that party harder than the ABD ever dreamed of partying in the US because she/he was brought up on that sepia toned version of Pakistan her FOB parents raised her on, that of course existed 30 years ago? How about THAT story?

Can we please get a movie about Indian-American expatriates which does not revolve around sex, sex and sex? I`m not saying that its a non-issue, but surely, there are other interesting things going on, right? How about the life of a hardworking FOB who leaves the familiar and comfortable confines of his home, culture and country to make a better living? Only to be ridiculed later by the designer-clothes-cladded ABCDs who forget that their own parents took a similar journey, and most probably looked and talked just like him.

I`m looking forward to this movie coming my way (hopefully)...and without having seen it, I know that Dimple Kapadia was an excellent choice for the role. The older woman-younger man relationship was also examined (tho` too briefly) in `Dil Chahta hai` again with Dimple as the older woman and she did a marvellous job. Thanks for the review, Anil!

P.S. What did you think of Agni Varsha?

Anil-
As taboo as I hear all the topics are, i really am looking forward to seeing this movie... It`s really absurd how much of prudes our cultures really are when dealing with anything to do with sex...especially since that didn`t stop Pakistan/India from over-zealousy producing too many bachas. Whenever my mother or mother-in-law-to-be want to make sure that my fiance and I aren`t doing any chaka chaka, all i get lectured about is ``izzat`` and sometimes I wish they would just come out and say it instead of slowing torturning me as if I`m 16! ...good review btw. :)

sara