Victory?

t:

touches as a depressing poem. helplessness?

more importantly, do you write these in urdu or english first? :)

promise vs. matter
surf vs shore
life vs death

a lot said
briefly
and in english and in urdu too!

PS: ``Death`s victory, death`s defeat``??
Come again, brother t
zara samjhayyay, braader t

i am so thoroughly depressed now t.
...promises of life with death, yes we`ve heard those promises more than enough.
i love the urdu....it`s beautifully sad.
love,
ana xo

Good stuff...... I think it was written in Urdu first. Its sad lately we don`t see the great characteristic of ``wazan`` in urdu poetry. Some time back, even free verse poetry would be rhytmic. Being a musician I always get annoyed by urdu poetry without rhythm.

Its true that we should let a poem be how it comes, but for some it comes WITH rhythm, and thats superior. It has a lot to do with how much poetry and literature you have read, and how you were taught rhymes and rhythms in the pre-school time.

I respect the expression of the writers` feelings here, and I wouldn`t want him to stop writing if his feelings dont confirm to the rules, but I really think poetry is a superior form of art only because the true poet feels and thinks in rhyme and rhythm.

Kalpana`s death has a special significance for the partition refugees in both India and Pakistan.

//The Chawlas` odyssey- February 02, 2003
On February 1, just 16 minutes before the Columbia Space Shuttle was to make its scheduled touch down, at the end of its 28th mission, it exploded over Texas, at a height of 200,000 feet.

Lost in that explosion were seven lives, including that of Kalpana Chawla, 41 -- a horrific end to a life that had its genesis in horror of a quite different kind.

It was sultry, and dark, on an August evening in 1947 when Banarsi Lal Chawla, then 14, lay on a railway track, thirsty, hungry, unconscious and bleeding. Around him, open coal wagons echoed with the cries of children, most of whom were living the final hours of their lives.
.....
.....
Meanwhile, a second generation was growing up – and taking inspiration from Kalpana`s odyssey from Karnal to outer space. Megha, a standard five student, told this correspondent shortly before Kalpana took off on what was to be her last voyage, that she wanted to be an astronaut like her aunt.

Till the evening of Saturday, January 31, the story was pure Horatio Alger -- a man who survived untold horrors and went on to make a fortune; and his daughter who, against the odds, went on to make her name in one of the most challenging of careers.

Today, that daughter`s life, her achievements, ended in a fireball that destroyed her spacecraft. And left behind, by that explosion, is an old man who, finally, finds a tragedy too great for even his innate stoicism to withstand.

Death must always win.

All one can hope for is an exit with a little dignity


Ras

Death is final.

Whether seven die or a thousand or a hundred or a few handful, we should all remember not to ask ``for whom the bells toll``, because we know the answer.

Ciao

temp:
Maut `hee` jeet, maut `hee` haar...but the finality and victory will not stop the ocean`s foam -- woh taqraar sabr se kabhi na khatam honewalli hai. And in that I see the jhalak of life`s junoon, if not victory...preferred the original (am sure) Urdu version...

love,
F

thank you chowk!

and thank you all for your comments…

rozaiba # 1: hum bhool g’aye…shayad urdu pehaly likha ho…
ana #2:….sad?…thought it ended on a ambivalent but positive note…tahemd # 3:…death’s victory is death’s defeat…when life loses the final round, death will lose its raison d`etre…
PI # 4:…you are so right…specially about pre-school exposure…

ferz: you mentioned life’s junoon, if not victory…well, after i had read some of these comments i remembered that i had written a ‘sequel’ of sorts…(now will have to go and find it)…in that life wins over death…some lines from memory…ijazat hay?

maut ko thaa apni hayaat-e-la-fana per ghuroor…
kasti rahi zindagi ko apnay shikanja-e-zeest maiN
…and then in ends with…
rafta rafta rooh-e-insaan paa ga’yee baleedgi
mard-e-momin qalb-e-insaaN say ootha
ajal ko oos nay kya humkinar maut say
maut per ab noha-khaaN koi nahiN
koi nahiN

…now i must go and find that poem!…btw there are two or three more on the unplugged…comments welcome as usual…

rgds and lve,

t

I dont think that azad nazm is a valid form of urdu poetry. But let`s see:

What is Qatra-e-Hayat-e-Nau by the way.

``tabassum-e-tifl
shikast-e-gohar-e-mishgaaN.``

Ok it is valid. Challay ga. I liked it.

but again

``---mahiyyat ki shakist with ehd-o-paymaN say``

it does not make sense, its off balance but also irrelevant.

t.,
isn`t it nice to know that `tabassum-e-tifl....` chaley ga?! :-)

qatra-e-hayaat-e-nau: qatra is drop or droplet, hayaat is life, nau, i`m guessing is new, or beginning...the `e` `s of course connect the words to each other...truly ji...i thought i was abysmal with urdu, i cannot even conceive the notion that you are worse...please tell me that your question, as some of your past statements, is a joke!!!!! p.s--most of what i`ve said here IS a joke `cept for the meaning of the words and my abysmal Urdu. :-)

t. again,
my sadness may have been the result of other things, and not necessarily this poem. The ending is more ambivalent, perhaps, otherwise why would there be a questioning of jeet (as indicated by ?).

love, a. xo

#13 ana_dobarah


The ``E```s do not ``ofcourse connect the words to each other``, they mean ``of`` or ``belonging to``.

#12, UrsTruly


Qatra-e-Hayaat-e-Nau can be translated as a droplet of sperm.

Hayaat-e-nau is ``New Life``, not ``The beginning of life``, as translated by the author.


I have seen some free verse poetry by Ibne Insha and Shafeequr Rehman, which is so rhytmic and so appealing to the sense of rhyme, I`d count them as acceptable!

t, hope you dont mind, I shall use your board to pass this good one I received over the internet along:
Ever wonder why....
>
>...why the sun lightens our hair, but darkens our skin?
>
>...why women can`t put on mascara with their mouth closed?
>
>...why you don`t ever see the headline ``Psychic Wins Lottery``?
>
>...why ``abbreviated`` is such a long word?
>
>...why doctors call what they do ``practice``?
>
>...why you have to click on ``Start`` to stop Windows 98?
>
>...why lemon juice is made with artificial flavor, while dishwashing
> liquid is made with real lemons?
>
>...why the man who invests all your money is called a broker?
>
>...why there isn`t mouse-flavored cat food?
>
>...who tastes dog food when it has a ``new & improved`` flavor?
>
>...why Noah didn`t swat those two mosquitoes?
>
>...why they sterilize the needle for lethal injections?
>
>...why they don`t make the whole plane out of the material used for the
> indestructible black box ?
>
>...why sheep don`t shrink when it rains?
>
>...why they are called apartments when they are all stuck together?
>
>...if con is the opposite of pro, is Congress the opposite of progress?
>
>...why they call the airport ``the terminal`` if flying is so safe?

Re: AmericanExpress # 9

Correct me, if I am wrong. We fear death, because we have tamed everything else and we have adapted the environment to suit us instead of the other way around. We try to cheat death; try to stay younger, but death always win in the end.

That is what Ras was suggesting, I think, and what I was referring to in my last interact post. Death is the end of a natural process of life and such, it has to be accepted. Death, due to its inability to be conquered, teaches us humility and makes us painfully aware of our own state of mortal insignificance. We pretend and preach myths of our own immortality, but in the end we have to bow before the inevitable. We fear death, because it reminds us of our impotence in becoming the masters of our own fate and when, periodically, confronted with it, we realize the chimera of our own lives. It is a moment of truth, which most of us would deny and not wish to happen and to create response to truth, we created the phantom known as the ``spirit of (wo)man``

Ciao

Paagal Insaan: errr...thank you for correcting me...that`s what I meant of course. I`ve studied a little bit of Arabic so I did know it meant `of`...thanks again! :-)