Being a Girl...

Dont blame your feminism for your pessimism and weakness. To be a girl is something you could not discover may be.

I remember Kaifi Azmi’s nazm after reading this poorly written pessimistic piece of …. (Sorry I wont say art)

Following are the few lines from that nazm


Nabz e hasti ka lahoo kanptay aansoo main nahi
Urnay khilnay main hay nik`hat, kham e gaisoo main nahi
Jannat ik aur hay, jo merd k pehloo main nahi
Uski aazad rawish per bhi machlna hay tujhay
Uth meri jaan meray saath hi chlna hay tujhay

This is way too pessimistic version of being a female. :(

Being a female, at least ``I`` can distinguish between optimism and pessimism. Chalo Shukr Hae!

#12 by gotztago on September 26, 2003 11:46am PT
yea...waseemte.....i actually read ure comments after posting mine......
an honest admission of a kinda careless attitude...appreciated...btw...my name is waseem.

u hav been actually abusing the point here...
no comments!!!
v were talkin abt the helplessness of any girl(such gals r present around surely)....n u >argued abt the girls who hav somewhat astray concepts to spend life n money....

well,if u read the last few lines again,u wud find out wht my arguement was....that its not a matter of gender,its a question of economics.The gals who are educated and have enough money in their person,generally,dont let their rights to be exploited.
So,its a question of human rights,not restricted to women rights.Talk of poverty alleviation...talk of educating the masses...and these problems would be over.

My second arguement was(i hate repeating things,btw).....well it was a bit of diversion....tht the main,if not the only,purpose of a typical Pakistabi gal is to(no offences) get a good husband....and I do hate it........so if they go to some nice places of learning,i dont mind...but plz dont go their with the sole purpose of hunting(not necessarily there) a hubby...u do have ur life(u are alive saroop,trust me!!!).....and do make use of the knowledge learnt there....so tht the already scarce resources of the country are not wasted.
esp when the human resource is our biggest gross national product!!!

and by the way,i dont think tht those gals from the socalled elite of pakland do have
´somewhat astray´idea of spending life.
v hav equally foolish boys around as well who come up noticing such things....and ....

and because,once upon a time when i was a kid and i went to rahat bakery for the sole purpose of buying a chicken burger,and i used the gals around as an example,
i am an ´equally foolish boy´-u are really good at making nice lil sarcastic remarks.dear ´i dnt know ur name´,keep up the good work!!!!
I would bore u no more.
waseem

Is there a typo? Is the author`s name Saroop Gurl? ;-)

Dear Waseem:
Its very common with boys what you described about being a boy and its usual for girls to get through like it in the male society. It happened to me too, same institutes you mentioned. But I never blamed girls for that. At the most I could call them `oppertunist` perhaps the reason for being oppertunist may bring more sympathy to them. to me it was always a man for this sex-discrimination and exploitation of males. Probably not you and I but some one else. Find ``you instructor`` one of those instances... hope to hear more from you on this issue.
Goonga

Not bad, though I felt it lost something in the forced rhyming. Think positive (I AM bright, I AM able) and you might get somewhere :)

Happy Navratri Swaroop ! Thought this is good one to post today ... enjoy !


The Garba
-- Chitra Banerjee Divakaruni

The nine sacred nights of Navaratri
we dance the Garba. Light glances
off the smooth wood floor of the gym
festooned with mango leaves
flown in from Florida. The drummers
have begun, and the old women
singing of Krishna and the milkmaids,
Their high keening is an electric net
pulling us in, girls who have never seen

the old land. This October night
we have shed our jeans
for long red skirts, pulled back
permed hair in plaits, stripped of
nailpolish and mascara, and pressed
henna onto hands, kohl
under the eyes. Our hips
move like water to the drums.
Thin as hibiscus petals, our skirts
swirl up as we swing and turn.
We ignore the men,

creaseless in bone-white kurtas.
In the bleachers, they smile behind their hands.
Whisper. Our anklets shine
in the black light from their eyes.
Soon they will join us in the Dandia dance.
The curve and incline, the slow arc
of the painted sticks meeting red on black
above our upraised arms. But for now
the women dance alone
a string of red anemones
flung forward and back
by an unseen tide. The old ones sing
of the ten-armed goddess.
The drums pound faster
in our belly. Our feet glide
on smooth wood, our arms are darts of light, Hair, silver-braided,
lashes the air like lightning.
The swirling is a red wind
around our thighs. Dance-sweat
burns sweet on our lips.
We clap hot palms like thunder. And

the mango branches grow into trees.
Under our flashing feet, the floor is packed black soil.
Damp faces gleam and flicker in torchlight.
The smell of harvest hay
is thick and narcotic
in our throat. We spin and spin
back to the villages of our mothers’ mothers.
We leave behind

the men, a white blur
like moonlight on empty bajra fields
seen from a speeding train.

Being a girl
I cannot meter
I cannot rhyme
I cannot write

yea...waseemte.....i actually read ure comments after posting mine......u hav been actually abusing the point here...v were talkin abt the helplessness of any girl(such gals r present around surely)....n u argued abt the girls who hav somewhat astray concepts to spend life n money....v hav equally foolish boys around as well who come up noticing such things....and there gestures encourage these girls...innit..A Serious Issue....neways...Rahat Bakery ko for no reason badnaam kiya...:P next time i`ll check carefully the ice-ness there.

#9 by gotztago on September 26, 2003 0:23am PT
a really gud work Saroop!
and for the obvious interacts with a pitiful advice of ``Stop Crying!!``.....
they jus cant agree anywhere....if u wud`ve said i`m free n i can do it the interact...................


i never sed it wasn`t a good work-
and i think i had some arguments -had someone answered those,I would have eally apreciated that.Unfortunately,using the derisive words like ` pitiful advice` serves no purpose at all.

regards
waseem

a really gud work Saroop!
and for the obvious interacts with a pitiful advice of ``Stop Crying!!``.....
they jus cant agree anywhere....if u wud`ve said i`m free n i can do it the interact from Az n temp wud`ve been ``Stop being over-confident!!``.............innit boyz.....

No Hard Feelings...:P
cheers

a really gud work Saroop!
and for the obvious interacts with a pitiful advice of ``Stop Crying!!``.....
they jus cant agree anywhere....if u wud`ve said i`m free n i can do it the interact from Az n temp wud`ve been ``Stop being over-confident!!``.............innit boyz.....

No Hard Feelings...:P
cheers

For some reason I am reminded of Emily Dickinson....

Daer Ma`am
It was a poem....it was a nice poem...a few words are in order.
Its time Pakistani females stop crying about ` being a girl`-and things like that.
I dont see any reason why should they cry...gone are the days when they could not give/live etc....and are able,and stable,and bright and they do have rights.Just a few examples.
Once upon a time I was a student at Government College Lahore.For those of you who dont know,its one of the best institutes in Pakistan.Over there,more than 90% of the population of masters students was female.I dont mind girls studying,but almost 90% of those gals were studying ` just for the fun of it`,and after graduating,they were not gonna do anything with their education,other than the possible application of that to managing a house and cooking...u know ..the usual stuff.I would say,this is a shear waste of already scarce national resource.The side effect of all this was.....tht many slighlty less capable guys,who were going to apply the skills learned at University,were denied the oppertunity.And u want the nation to progress!!!!
And sadly(for males),I hear that Govt College would now take in female students in undergrad courses.I do not mind that at all.But the irony is,Kinnaird College is still exclusively for women.Well,if you talk of equality,the should let the men in.But the fair sex wont talk of equality here...its discrimination on the basis of sex.and unfortunatley,it is biased agianst men.
Another example,but a slightly different one.Once upon a time,I was a student at NUST.for all of u who dont know,it happens to be rather the best technical university of pakistan.There,we had two female classmates.In one subject,we needed somewhat 85 marks out of 100 to get an A grade.Our female classmates had somewhat 30 marks in the sessionsal(out of 50),and they could never get an A,even if they scored 50/50 in the final exam.But to my and many of my friends` astomishment,they got A`s!!!.That is like defetaing the well founded principle of arithematics.Wht did they do???I dont know,probably they ,or the instructor would be knowing.
The bottom line:The poem does mention all the disadvantages of being a girl in a male dominated society.I would recommend you should write a poem on the advantages as well!!!!
And who says that the girls are not free!!!The girls you see in Lahore ,karachi, Islamad-in liberty,or at rahat bakery(rawalpindi,thts a ice place,by the way) - aint they free?Dont they have the freedom of wearing semi-nude seathrough dresses(Well,I am too liberal to mind that too).Dont they have the freedom of hanging out with friends at night?Although they dont have as much freedoms as the boys,but if they call themselves muslims,they should be contented with that.For islam doesnt give them `absolute freedom` like boys.God has been a bit unfair.The only way out for them is to say godbyee to religion.Calling themselves muslims and crying abt women rights in public is sheer hypocrisy.
That was a bit of diversion,lets get back to the girls you see hanging out in defence.Well,they are free enough to do what they like,study what they want and marry the man of their choice.The counter arguments would be that the women from less well off families do not enjoy all those priviliges.True.But is it a question of gender then???Isnt it a question of econimics???
Women in power,like benezir bhutto,has never been any better than their male counterparts.they have exploited and plundered in the same way as their male counteparts,if not worse.
thats all for now.
waseem

May I suggest you read similar poems by Sylvia Plath and Taslima Nasrin?

Saroop Gul
What a perfect example of PATRIARCHY your poem is!Your poem is the essence of patriarchy in simple words.I simply loved your poem.Keep it up.