Graffiti Christ II: The Resurrection

Hilarious! simply fun to read especially the statements of the bearded lady . But, then females are reknowned for their non stop chatter, aren`t they?? heheh!!! But, the guys sure did know how to shut her up.

I personally know some ladies who discontinued threading for the very reason given in the story: and the ones who didn`t pointed out that if they do decide to wax or thread etc. it should only be to please their husbands.. as then only the act is justified :) It is not justified if a lady wants to look good for herself then.... :( :)

furthermore, it is indeed true that some muftis are linked to political organisations and brain wash innocent , or rather dumb individuals who forget to use their brain. The people, who however were/ are using their brains are the two guys who decide to blow the coke factory up.

But, ofcourse one can not generalise and claim that all religious scholors or mufti`s encourage such ruthless slaughter of Muslims themselves. The ones who do, as i said before are linked to other organisations, who may not have religious motives at all.

Paracha,

Very creative expression of issues that pertain to life. But I have to ask what the f*** is going on in your head? This is great stuff your writing...a little wierd though (that`s what makes it great)...It`s really fragmented, just simple dialogues and discriptions of impossible and ridiculous situations. Even the first short story, come`on a woman with a beard? There are very few of those, that`s pushing it a little. But I do like the way you express how stupid people can become when blinded with ``religon.`` Keep up the good work, and stay away from the drugs :)

:“Ummm …how far is that Coke factory ? ”
“Not that far.” Said Mansoor. “About five minutes drive.”
“Good” said Faisal, looking at the ticking timer again. “We have about seven minutes.”

Is boycotting and destroying American products, something that people in our country support?

CITY UNDER SIEGE

The Karachi Press Club invites you to come and register your protest.

Violence has once again cast a dark shadow over Karachi, a city where residents have already suffered enough. Brief periods of stability inevitably re-erupt into violence. Makeshift measures are taken and peace is restored, but only temporarily. Residents of Karachi feel angry and helpless.

Wear a black arm-band in protest and mourning; bring suggestions; bring yourself. Join us in our demand that the government make security a top priority for our city.

This afternoon is not being patronized by any organization or political party. Let this be a citizens’ event.

There will also be a screening of

“Doctor”

A short film about death.


Synopsis: Saeed Hussain is a doctor in Karachi, Pakistan. Many of his colleagues have been gunned down by sectarian extremists. Others have moved to safer climes, but Hussain has neither the will nor the means to. Driven by his wife, for the sake of their daughter, to face his fear rather than flee from it, he goes through the motions of a normal day. But even healers have no answers to bullets.

at

The Press Club

Saddar, Karachi

Saturday, 5th May, 2004

3 p.m. (sharp)

nooralain ??? no one is forcing you to say anything -- u have the choice to or not to interact with anyone you want -- but please spare me the homilies and cut out the resptected trash plz -- and vindictive? moi???? plzzzzzzzz

trash man -- i see there is no irony in your name -- dude ever heard of not poking your nose where it doesnt belong -- i couldnt really care less if i am respected or disrespected here -- are you telling me that my so-called reputation here, or lack thereof, should dictate what i post here? doesnt work like that trash -- why in the world would i be ticked off with nooralain plz yaar there are better things in life than to be annoyed with interactors on a website --

#40 capri:

I really wish it were so but I know for a fact that Ur assumption is not true atleast for few ppl I know personally.

#50

i already answered your question the first time you asked it. it is NOT complicated english to say that i do not consider myself to be a good writer. so why are you having a problem with that? and furthermore, who the heck are you to dictate how i should answer questions, whether they be a simple yes or no.

that you don`t like what i have to say is plain to see. i have not been all too impressed with some of your responses either. so here is a suggestion. . .either you continue your virtual baiting and make an ass of yourself, or you and i stop interacting with each other unless we can have an intelligent and rancor-free discussion. i personally prefer the latter. and so if you continue on with what trashman not so incorrectly says appears to be your vindictiveness, i am no longer going to respond to your posts. and i will post this at NFP`s other article board if you continue over there. now a respected assistant editor of a respected english daily should NOT find this so difficult to understand, should he?

omar, seriously dude, why the heart-break talk? What did you do to him Noor? will saying omar is a better writer than you rest his demons? omar, you`re a respected writer here, so why are you behaving like a vindictive lover? Chill.

trashman ???? errrr a simple question and you think that trash ? tch tch

nooralain sahiba -- u still didnt answer straight up and instead said, i think, that its too much to expect from me what i asked of you -- oh well....

trashman:

if indeed omar is ticked off with me (aur bhi gham hain zamanay main. . .) i`m sure he`ll get over it. besides his question was a simple one afterall. . a simple one to ask whether i`m implying that i consider myself to be in the leagues of those good `messed up` writers. and as i`ve already said i don`t even think of myself as a `good` writer. so why should i imply that i am. why does he think i am. there are more important things to talk about anyways. . .so baitbaazi khatam na ki jaye? : )

ref #47
L O L! Noor, Omer seems pretty ticked off with you. Do not play with
the emotions of an assistant editor sahib. By the way has anybody seen
PunjabiZulu anywhere? He was another once upon a time NFP hater turned
NFP fan.

quraishi saab- -

from you. .yes.

was that simple enough? :)

#44 nass I thought this could come up. Refer ``Beards for dummies`` or go to itchteeteepeecolonslashslashtriplewdotbeardistandotorg.
ps And no, I am not a good man, in case anybody`s wondering.

???? nooralain -- is it too much to expect a simple yes or no to a pretty uncomplicated question?

rahul_capri
Interesting the way you differentiate between beardos and beardists. Since Nadeem Farooq Paracha has a beard as well I wonder what is he? An commie beardo or an anarchist beardist??

I didn`t get it. I mean, I understand the anti-religion vitriol and all, but I didn`t get anything other than that.

fahadist,

i think rahul capri makes more sense in his few lines than i do in my entire post to you. it is not my intention to impose my opinion on you or anyone. . .i analyze too much sometimes. i know that you are entitled to your own opinion, but i do want to question your thought process in regards to comparing NFP to some of the more extremist clerics.

baaghiraja,

rather than telling mbz isphahani what a good man he is, which i`m sure is the case. . .i`m surprised that with your cleverness and your powers of whatever anyone attributes to you that you cannot decipher the code that isphahani speaks in. for example, in one of his earlier posts to you on this board, i am almost convinced that he`s echoing marlon brando from `on the waterfront` --that very famous brando line where he says, `i could`ve been somebody. i could`ve been a contender.` *very bad marlon brando drawl and not verbatim*

: )

``NFP`s atheism is not a concern for me but when ppl discriminate someone on the bases of stereotypes .. then it causes problems and NFPs peice voluntarily or involuntarily places a stereotype over males (or female:P) with beard and I have been target of such stereotypes in the past... more so by desis than the amreekees!!!! ``
fahadist, IMO nfp`s audience is intelligent enough to distinguish between the beardos and the beardists.So, take it easy.

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fahadist,

focus on the context of this story, if you would, for now. . .this is a piece of fiction, but unfortunately not all of us are convinced by the fact that there are not muslim clerics who call for death to so and so. and when they do the call, some people listen. some of us have lived in pakistan and have heard these calls, we know people who are given sunnat. that is what this story is about. it is not so far-fetched. then again it is meant to be so, it is written in an absurd exaggerated manner purposely to make a point. the point is that there are those muslim clerics who advocate violence, and purification (or cleansing) of their deen and land. and there are those who are too willing to comply: floaters. no one has talked about the title of this piece.

then there are those `floaters` who are horrified about a bomb going off in a market, but find it justifiable to engage in violence and destruction against an oppressive multinational corporation, and ruin the lives and livelihoods of those who are trying to make a living and are also oppressed by said corporation: floaters.

floaters have no loyalty, no sense of belonging to a place. or those who have nothing fixed in their lives. . .NfP is playing with the idea of floaters in connection to the violence that can disrupt our everyday lives. the only thing fixed for both khadija, and the friends faisal and mansoor here is their commitment to violence. yes, NFP is critical of islam (religion altogether) and multinationals. . .but also, and you may disagree with me here, he is questioning this notion of floaters. . .and their involvement, and what if there is any good that comes out of this involvement.

i am the wrong person to ask about people who strap themselves to bombs and lay in front of tanks. i see nothing heroic in that.

yes, somehow NfP does have a considerable influence on the `progressive` and `open-minded` intellectuals. but i think it`s rather a stretch to say that there would be `floaters` out there who will find in his writing a cause to hate. . .because you are wrong to conclude that NFP writes because he wants to promote hatred. that is what you are implying here fahadist, and this is where he is different from a mullah who orders death to the unbelievers. and when there are people who say, `achcha hua, inn maulvion ke saath yehi hona chahiye` i don`t necessarily share that sentiment, but i think it`s ludicrous to believe that NFP is advocating death to the maulvis, he would be happy seeing the end of `organized religion` though. the irony of a writer calling for an end to religion which perhaps he implicitly suggests is that he himself could be part of a system that has no less oppressive elements in it than that of religion. and then again he could be part of no system at all. . .a floater.

nooralain @27:

first off Ur question asking suicide bombers being islamic is incomplete the context plays a part in everything. Legend goes that in 1965 indo-pak war ppl straped bombs to their chest and lay infront of tanks... were they terrorists???? and also who to be blamed.. if U R putting a child in the middle of a highway then U R evil maniac if I am driving in a school zone at 90 mph then I am a crazy maniac... the death is of inocent but who do U blame in each case?

NFP`s atheism is not a concern for me but when ppl discriminate someone on the bases of stereotypes .. then it causes problems and NFPs peice voluntarily or involuntarily places a stereotype over males (or female:P) with beard and I have been target of such stereotypes in the past... more so by desis than the amreekees!!!!

NFP has a considerable influence on the ``progressive`` and ``open minded`` intelectuals and for whome bashing religion is a fav pastime. And if his writting causes ppl to have hatred against some other ppl then I dont see much difference in him and the maulvi who orders death to the disbeleivers! if U hear after the death of that mulla in Karachi that ``achha hooa.. inn mulaon kay saath yeh hee hona chaheeay`` then there is a problem.

trashman,

i missed you kooRe ka banda. :) where have you been? did you go to london and moon the queen?!?! :))

#30
M.B.Z.Isphahani

Martian temple willing PATTERN:
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Aha, good to come back to chowk and find this. Really enjoyed it, NFP. As much as GC:1.
So the crusade against corporate capitalism and relegion continues.
Saminsha,I think NFP`s style is more like Beckett-meets-Burroughs, but to me he remains
a truely origenal writer whose time is yet to come. Race ahead brother.

wat make you thnk that muftis actually tells what you portray here....
its not like that....as a matter of fact they do tell to jihad but they dont ask you to go bomb urself and detonate that in zainab market.....they just dont

none of the muftis given any fitwa abt suicide bombing of this sort to be jihad.
yes suicide bombers in israel r doing jihad....but not the one bombing in city..and mosques.

?Sir, I arrest you for attempting to smoke and treason ...?
?What ... you b***d! You vicious, slimy b***d!?
? ... and madness. May God have mercy on you.?

A likely end to the truly outspoken few.

Question: Does Khadija smoke?

quraishi saab,

i am not a good writer, so why would i claim or even faintly imply that i am one? looking at that post with a clinical objective eye, or reading between the lines, i still cannot fathom how the implication came about. are you perhaps projecting your own claim on to me? or is it the `messed up` part? now that, perhaps i could lay claim to. . .

#15
Umer
Wait till you read “Cactus Gas.” Correction: Wait till “they” decide when (if ever) you can read it.

#16 M.B.Z.Isphahani
~~Recently, I visited Calcutta Mumbai Delhi Patna Allahabad
Lucknow Jharkand AGRA where Hindus seem to have elephant
hanuman Naag and all kind of god and goddesses…~~

Ah, but have you visited Mars? There, gods and goddesses have Hindus. Some of them elephants. Now have you ever heard of a god worshiping humans? Contact NASA now!
PS: You’re still a good man.

#18
noorlain
“And ah, when you work it out I`m worse than you
Yes, when you work it out I wanted to,
And ah, when you work out where to draw the line,
Your guess is as good as mine ..”
_ Coldplay


#23 fahdist
My message? Okay.
Stop believing in messengers. Especially those using loudspeakers, bells, crosses, swastikas, brand names, jingles, naats, choirs, chants ….

#24
Very clever of you as well, feedback. And I’m your pitfall.

#25
Yellow3
(Khadija) might have exploded in that mosque. But she imploded a long time ago. Which is worse.

#28
Saminasha
Beckett reminds me of me as well. And if you should know, Khadija is a Beckettsque exaggeration of a real character.

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nooralain -- in reference to your post #18, are you implying that you are also one such good writer? --

Paracha Sahib,

Why am I reminded of Beckett?

Nice work...although you do realize that is statistically impossible that Khadija, a woman, is actually wackier than her two guy buds...I guess in imaginary worlds, anything can happen...

fahadist: #23

just because NFP claims to be an atheist and does not like organized religion does not mean that he despises anyone who differs from him in matters of faith. if that was the case then i would think he despises me. hmmm. . .i need to think this through!

and other than NFP`s responses. .or the article, where i see no mention of him putting down islam as a faith. . .you, good man, fall into the same trap of thinking that anti-extremism is anti-islam. tell me (or us), are you of the belief that suicide bombers, and murdering innocent people is islamic? when you read `the god couple`, do you miss out on the point that the tables have turned with extremists and that god has been distorted and `created` by extremists in any faith, be they catholic or muslim or jewish or whatever? NFP has said nothing ill of the Prophet or Islam per se. . .and muftis in any shape or form are not god.

by the way, more than a few responses on this board so far have come from muslims, with the exception of me, and perhaps some agnostics/atheists. so no there is no `hate the muslim` theme or propaganda here. . .yet. are you interested in spreading some proper gand i mean propaganda of your own?

baaghiraja #24

good girl this! *turns back towards you, stops, and decides that her following action would be anti-any religion as well as decency*

yellow3. . .#26

sad isn`t it? truth is indeed stranger than fiction. .and worse.

Very clever, Mr. Paracha. A clever way of saying that why waste time and energy
bombing innocent people when you should be using these bombs blowing up multinationals.
I am impressed. But remember being clever has its pitfalls.
And about the `God Couple` what makes you say antismoking is a facist ploy?

LOL ... excellent NFP, alla. btw `khadija` just blew up in a karachi masjid killing dozens.

#21
Good girl.

Its ironic how amreekee goras are less prone to believe the loopsided extreme views of generalizing islam and restricting it to the stupid ways of Binladen and likes but the Pakis wanabe goras and ``intelectuals`` are not only ready to beleive the crap sent down to them but are propagating the vendetta. The piece was awesome and funny but between the lines seemed to have a propogandaist hate the muslim theme. Most of the replies had a similar anti-Islamic bias. Just curious NFP .. is this Ur msg? to despise anyone whose views differ from Urs in matters of faith???

the other irony of `floaters` of course, among others that i may have missed, is that faisal kills khadija to keep her from setting off the bomb in zainab square, but he`s not averse to throwing the bomb in the coca-cola factory and destroying lives and livelihoods over there. when it comes to violence. . .what is the difference between `muftis`, `capitalist pigs`, and `communistoon, anarchistic dogs`? : )

ah, but the gaze hasn`t diverted entirely from corporate slogans: `the real thing`. . gawd i remember that! the question is does anyone remember when RC cola adverts first slammed our television screens, and that long-haired hippie type with the drums, and i think there was a trampoline as well somewhere.

digressing. . .i know, yes nadeem, my you know what is here now. . .so kya? : ) i`ll talk about the parables and what they mean agar ijaazat ho tau?!

when i was reading `floaters` and all this about the sunnat, and doing what her mufti tells her to do, i was reminded of a passage from the book i`m currently reading called Reading Lolita in Tehran. and hopefully it is not too out of context to bring that here.
from page 30 of Reading Lolita in Tehran:

``Imagine Yassi standing with me in front of that green gate, laughing between conspiratorial whispers, our bodies close together. She was talking about the teacher who taught Islamic morality and translation. A Pillsbury Dough boy personality, she said. Three months after his wife`s death, he had married her younger sister, because a man--and here Yassi lowered her voice--(in italics) a man has his special needs.
Then her voice took on a serious tone as she began to describe his recent lecture on the difference between Islam and Christianity. She now became this dough-faced little man standing by the blackboard, pink chalk in one hand, white chalk in the other. On one side he had written in large white letters MUSLIM GIRL, and drawn a vertical line in the middle of the board. On the other side, in large pink letters, he wrote CHRISTIAN GIRL. He had then asked the class if they knew the differences between the two. One was a virgin, he said at last, after an uncomfortable silence, white and pure, keeping herself for her husband and her husband only. Her power came from her modesty. The other, well, there was not much one could say about her except that she was not a virgin. To Yassi`s surprise, the two girls behind her, both active members of the Muslim Students` Association had started to giggle, whispering, (in italics) No wonder more and more Muslims are converting to Christianity.``

Apologies for the long quote but i wanted to keep the context intact somehow. anyway. i was thinking about sunnat. . .and what we (or i should say muslims in this context) are taught and what the reality is out there. and that`s what connected the two texts for me.

the absurdity of a woman growing a beard because somehow, somewhere waxing became a western concept (i always understood it to be the opposite), and the absurdity, nay, the inhumanity of going to bomb zainab market with no other care than that she will go to heaven (will heaven let her in is the question for those who believe?) and then faisal, committing what he felt was the needful crime of murdering her in order to save all those in zainab market (i suspect zainab market isn`t limited to pakistani muslims alone. . .) the absurdity of all this is rich, in my opinion. and hilarious in terms of language. .words like sexical, and `you go keelub and play badminton.`

and the irony of khadija is that she is portrayed as the antithesis of what a `good, white and pure` muslimah is. and this isn`t unrelated to news reports we hear of young women being trained up in the north to do acts similar to what khadija sets out to do. dark humor here succeeds in critiquing false teachers, teachings, and the actions that result as of those.

i`m still trying to wrap my mind around `the god couple` i was trying to recall `godless` or searching absurd couples like lucky and pozzo from `waiting for godot` or rosencrantz and guilderstern from `rosencrantz and guildenstern are dead`, and it`s been so long i can`t recall. . .but all i can wrap my mind around here is the betrayal. . .you`ve been reading too much science fiction lately haven`t you?! the bioborg, like khadija is not concerned with life, or the things associated with it, utrapit is the ultimate fascist. . only interested in assimilation and or extermination. darker than `floaters`. . .and just as absurd. .or less so.

as shandana says, more power to your pen indeed! : )
n~

p. s. and now i`ll go have my chai and ciggie!

nass. . .

whatever. don`t worry, be happy! you live with your twisted ideas and i do the same, theek hai? : )

noorlain, I agree with umer. And anyway in the many interviews I have read on Nadeem, he himself seems very candit talking about his breakdowns. So why should you be so bothered?

umer. . .

i KNOW that most if not all good writers are a bit `messed up`. they have to be, in order to create the worlds they create. . .that was not the point though. NFP, i suppose, can be cavalier (though something tells me he isn`t) about his `mental breakdowns` because he has made it through them. some people don`t though. and so yes, it does bother me when people constantly refer to what involves a great deal of pain and suffering in the terms that have been referred to every flippin` time a NFP article or story appears.

we as readers tend to romanticize and even minimize raymond carver`s alcoholism, or virginia woolf`s suicide, and her breakdowns, and i just find that really problematic, but that`s just me. now if you say so what again, fine. so i`ll just keep my opinions on the matter to myself from now on. glad you`re enjoying the `madness.`

n~

Nadeem F.P.,

That was fantastic!!! I couldn`t stop laughing my donkey off at the first story. The bit about `oh you shut up,` and `you play keelub and badminton` was just so, so, so on the spot.

Love you, man.

Neuro,

All good writers are a bit messed up. I`m really starting to like Nadeem`s writing and I wouldn`t be surprised if he talks to his herbs and spices or stands sideways naked in front of a mirror, swells his abdomen with air and holds his belly like a pregnant woman. So what?

Umer M.

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# 1
nooralain
The sooner the better.

#2
M.B.Z.Isphahani
You’re a good man.

#3 fadyady
Funny how I suspect that too. ;)

#4
zebunnisa
Gracias.

#7
Nass
Okay, Nass, “not another breakdown.” It wasn’t as if you were cleaning after my first (or second) one. So why worry? Enjoy the Garffiti.

#8
Warlus
Define “wicked?” (Without a having a meltdown).

#9
atif1
There are no gates. Just holes. Ask Alice.

#10
rahul_capri
Radio play genre, hmmm. Interesting prospect. But this would need a wholly different frequency. The sort those poor sods keep waiting for at SATI.
Honored to be compared with the great Manto, even though I’m nowhere near him. Thank you nonetheless.

#11
M.B.Z.Isphahani
You’re a good man.

#12
Hello Shandana. Glad to have made your morning pleasant. I made sure this piece came without the surgeon general’s warning. Smoke up.

#13
Ahmedbilal
Sticky wicket, Ahmed. Strangely, the umpires are neither giving me out nor letting me bat. I think I’ll retire hurt.

#14
nooralain
Hey is that me running naked on the streets? Nass should know. She worries a lot about my mental health. Don’t you nightingale?

warlus and nass,

why don`t you give up on bringing up the breakdowns? have you ever had mental breakdowns of your own??? they don`t produce creativity per se. give NFP some credit for being able to be creative without having a bloody breakdown. . .or is that so difficult for you `normal` people???

Nadeem, when are you posting ``Cactus Gas`` on Chowk? Or is it too hard to swallow for this site? Thanks.

have managed to read the resurrection, with my morning chai and ciggie, what a way to start the day. think its fantastic! so glad you`ve turned that gaze on something other than popsicles and corporate slogans which, imho, is a waste of your talent. good thing my opinion doesn`t matter :)

more after reading the second half later in the day after i`ve recovered from the first.

more power to your pen nfp,
shandana

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It`s nice to see you taking a sudden turn into this sort of stuff. The bad state of the Pakistani pop scene must be driving you nuts.:D
Actually enjoyed this more than Graffiti Christ PT:1. Now stick to this because no matter how bizzare your stories seem they vividly capture the rot around us. And what is this fascination of yours with smoking laws and God?
Keep it up. And this time, Nadeem, please, please not ANOTHER breakdown, hee, hee.

This was Wicked.
Nass, what do you mean he should not have another breakdown? As I see it NFP is always suffering from a breakdown ...
No offence but I seriously think he gets his flashes of brilliance evrytime he`s having a mental meltdown, am I right Paracha? BTW thought both titles were a blast dude. So the Paracha theatre of the absured goes on ....

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Nadeem f. Paracha,Wow.
Pakistan has certainly come a long way from the time when Faiz wrote-
``chali hai rasm ki koi na sar utha ke chale`` and
``Woh baat saare fasane me jiska zikr na tha/ Woh baat unko bahut nagawaar guzri hai ``
Maybe Manto Insha penned something as brilliantly satirical and funny as this, maybe not.
By the way, this reminded me of some plays penned by Manto for radio.Your pieces fit so well in the radio play genre.

“Muslims think from their hearts and the goras
think from their penises”

..and I thought goras think from their dick! What penis got to do with thinking; it has no head…

“What does your mufti say about goris?” Asked Faisal.”

I think this is a legit question like the one that is being asked scrumptiously by the Lesbian crowd. Is God a he or a she?
Now our author would have me believe that God is a He but the lesbians reading this may differ.
It would say he is clipped. So, may be he is “it”. Did I say He is…

#4

{Your two pieces make me suspect, you have a mind.}

hahahahahaha

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Hey, if you are original, you are cool.
Your two pieces make me suspect, you have a mind.

floaters.....
as always, i somehow dont tire of NFP`s writing.......

the god couple....
ok.

Nadeem. . .

so it is here! the god couple drove me crazier than godot! more later. i just wanted to say for now, my eyes just about popped out when i saw this!

honestly, more sooner than later : )
n~