Last Rites: An Evening at a Pak/Indian Show-biz Award Ceremony

Fine even if someone here said that it is tough for som,e
people to understand Paracha`s ``dadaist`` stuff, but this
is so typical of his old stuff and in-your-face blasting of pretention and globalisation of indians and pakistanis. What so hard in understanding that?

And yes, even ABCDs say Mashallah..some of us with a trace of irony...

This was pretty funny...even a layperson as myself could understand it...

Bhali keray aya, paracha saain. With this blazing article I see you
are going back to square one. This was fun but let`s have more
of those Dadaist stories, maan.

ana

please dont stop enjoying NFP if you do. The prole stuff was just to bait mr nfp in listening to my request.

Nadeem..
I personally thought the awards were a good effort by Pakistan`s show bizz people. But then you just love satirizing anything and evrything that becomes a high profile event. I did enjoy the article. It is as your many fans would say ``typical NFP`` but how about something that would help these actors and models to improve? Asking too much from the rudest and most blunt writer on chowk?

jang:

not that i`m trying to convert you to do wah-wahs, but since you`ve said you fail to understand all the other wah-wahs, i offer this by way of humble explanation:

NFP`s humor and his topics will have not have universal appeal. there are people from various parts of the world. . even the `intelligent` parts that will appreciate what he`s saying but in the mostly capitalistic societies that we live in, and off of. . .no, he`s not going to have universal appeal. of course it would be nice, and so wider audience success is hardly irrelevant.

and proles do get it. it takes some a little longer to actually absorb it. . .but they do get it. usually if i don`t get something, i just don`t respond. like this whole mughal vs. british contest, and who was the better imperialist and robber of resources. what the heck is all that about?!

you`re not stupid. you just think differently, dat b`dat b`dat`s all! :)

i find NFP humor extremely far-fetched. it reminds me of articles in college campus rags, where the writers seem to write for each other (their fellow writers) as an audience, with little universal appeal, but it did not matter much to them as wider audience success was irrelevant.

so with the risk of appearing stupid, i register my voice as someone who just dont get it and fail to understand all the other wah-wahs.

NFP, you seem to be a good writer, but can you please write on something which us proles can get?

#22 Stuka
Baaghiraaja:
~~You know ``compassionate conservatives`` like with me would appreciate humor from any source. ;) ~~

Yes, epecially anti-religion and anti-corporate humour coming from ``benevolent Marxists.`` Admit it.

#20 Warlus,
In the last ten years or so, I`ve enjoyed the anarchist tag more than I have the Marxist label. But recently I`ve been settling for anarcho-Marxist-existentialisto. But then, of course, there are the more simpler ones that have come my way as well, such as ``Funky-Junky,`` or the good ol`, one-word ``ba*tard!`` All lovelingly put and profiled, though.

#24 tintingem,
~~Tell me NFP, what am I to do when people actually sing praises of the awards on my face~~

Hold your breath till you turn blue. Let`s see what they sing then. Or you can just puke.

rgds,
NfP

Bravo!
After watching the pathetic awards...with the wonderful ads (as rightly pointed out by Rahul #1)...this comes as a treat.Tell me NFP, what am I to do when people actually sing praises of the awards on my face??

Walrus:

I have not interacted a great deal with Mr. Paracha but we had an interesting exchange on the Maobadi movement in Nepal, hence my perception.

Baaghiraaja:

You know ``compassionate conservatives`` like with me would appreciate humor from any source. ;)

thanks Mrs NFP. now i cud see that The purpose of this article, was to prove the dangers of genetic engineering and the immoral cloning technology. :>

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Stuka, the truth is as far as I remeber NFP has always been known more as an anarchist than a marxist. btw NFP a real lol piece again and your reposnses are equally entertaining. But i shouldn`t be using that word, should i? and what is this thing about you quiting bandbaja? your pic and bio`s still there.

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#5
Gracias, Summaiya

#6 Nass
~~ This is the kind of stuff that first made him notorious in Pakistan.~~

Yes, Nass, this and one of your favorite subjects regarding “the source of my creative input”, i.e. my 17 breakdowns and near-overdoses! ;) Thank you, nonetheless.

#7 niki777
~~Don`t be so hard on them!!.Look at what they have to work with!!!.~~

Perhaps, but only if they start working with people with genuine talent instead of inflated, misplaced egos and hot air. They’re full of it and the last thing they deserve is a glamorized award. In Pakistan at least, all this razz-matazz is no more than a media-showbiz-corporate mafia promoting and patting each other’s vested commercial interests in the name of art, fashion and music. A farce with heavy make-up, platform shoes and the most cringing pretensions this side of Bollywood. There you have it. Wasn’t all that hard on them now was I? Must be having another breakdown.

#8 by mughaleazaam on July 25, 2004 5:07pm PT
~~please mention the purpose of this article, is it some shugally stuff, and if it is then HA HA HA HA, buhat hansee ayee, wow~~

The purpose of this article, mughaleazam (or should I say ‘alam pana’) was to prove the dangers of genetic engineering and the immoral cloning technology. But you may also read it as the lost chapter from Shehshah Akber’s ‘Deen-e-Illahi.’ Just for ‘shugal.’

#9 bat
~~But btw, whats the slaanlaikum spoof? did each person actually come on stage and say slanlaikum?~~

Ever heard the way many Pakistani yuppies and trendies use the word mahshallah? It’s quite hilarious, really. Observe how often they use it, especially when talking about their children, job and business. Sometimes more often than their bearded and conservative counterparts. But the funny thing is, when the mullah hazraat say it with a heavy Arabic accent, the yuppies and the fashion brigade say it in a strange British-meets-American accent (even though it usually comes out sounding more like Platonion Greek!). So, since they also have a habit of saying Aslamualaikum (especially, if not ONLY, on the tele), I wondered ...

#10 by garam_chai on July 25, 2004 8:16pm PT
~~We should call it a show-biz award ceremoney for cheezy singers. As the great singer mehdi Hasan, once called all these pop music ``sheetani music``.~~

Now, now garam chai, they may not be your cup of chai, or the legendary Mehdi Hassan’s glass of Scoth, but “sheetani” they are not. Otherwise I would have been praising them, instead of plaguing them! However, you are more than welcome to call my writings “sheetani,” and that too, MORE than once.



#11 CoolHandLuke
~~They sucked and what better person to tell us that than Nadeem Farooq Paracha. ~~

Now am I supposed to take this as a compliment? Why can’t I be the person telling about an event that does not suck? Something like George Bush choking on Pretzels, or Shaukat Aziz finally having to learn how to tie a zarband in a crisply starched shalwar, or BJP falling flat on its face by actually believing all the pre-election surveys conducted by Rupert- Murdoch-run media scams, or Osama now having to use a Russian-made flush system in Wana instead of a hole he was so comfortable with in Tora-Bora ?

#12 ana
Yup! After all, I do believe that the Theatre of Absurd style is a wonderful slap-stick reflection of the black comedy that passes as “reality.”

#13 by taqat-e-parvaaz on July 25, 2004 10:42pm PT
~~what is it with you paracha and junaid jamshed?~~

What is with Junaid and me? Well, to begin with, we both have beards. But his is a lot longer than mine.

~~you think he`s been duped into becoming religious? sorry that for all your wasted braincells you seem intent on completely destroying this mans personal quest to bring salvation into his life.~~

Yes. I guess when huge Pepsi contracts stop working, God becomes the next best thing to salvation.

~~sorry to mullah out on you paracha. leave the man alone.~~

Don’t worry. I’ve been mullahed out a number of times. Being mullahed IN, now THAT is a real bummer. Ask Jamaima.


#15 by wajahat
~~the Lux show was 95% Indian venture with the likes of Sony arranging most of the segments in the Show. Even the rights to the Show were only available to Sony and none of the Pak tv Channels.~~

No wonder.

#16 Sidrah
Hello, Sidrah. Oh, well, I guess they’d had enough of that rude, cranky NFPism at bandbaja.org.
Just been busy with, y’know, a new series of breakdowns and addictions, that’s all.

#17 stuka
~~A Marxist with a sense of humor? well well, what else is new?? :)~~

What else is new? A conservative appreciating a Marxist`s humor! Now tell me, what else is the same ol`, same ol`?


Rgds,
NfP