City Connection

this sounded so creepily familiar that for a while i thought it was me you were talking about and for a moment i forgot it was fiction. but then i got to the part where you mentioned the bensons and realized it couldn't be me. i just do marlboro reds :)

amazing story. i miss karachi even more insanely now. i used to drive through that route nearly every day till two months ago.. you just made me miss karachi driving :)

For the first couple of paragraphs, sounded promising and consequence-driven
But the length just killed the charm.
Good try, though.

the story was too long ...the end pathetic...though the idea was promising.....decrease the length and put in some grey matter.......write more.....cya!

Adnan

I loved your article and it literally made me ROFL(Roll-on-the-Floor-Laughing aka IRC ROFL) at numerous occasions at how accuately you have penned you feelings.....and believe me it made me register at Chowk.com to rave about it.

Your article truly captured the essence of what I guess most guys driving lesser cars would feel while looking onto glistening Beamers, Civic`s and Toyotas driven by mersmerizing femininity.

The candid, accurate details and the eloquent expression of the minutest nuances without being verbose and overwhelming, really nitro-charged the humour in this car chase....

I have driven my FX for a long time now (since 1992) and I love it for rugged, bare-bones,

Luddite functionality...believe it would have been easier for you to beat this Civic driving beauty if it were the narrow winding roads and the outrageously crazy traffic of Lahore.

Viva FX!!

P.S.
The appeal of this article has some nostalgic association with a classic romatic script of a poor dude falling in love with a rich lass?

i think u rambled on for a little longer than required..but i like the fact that it dint go to the ``i got her mobile number too`` scenario..which when telling this story to his mates..the guy would also say.....
the race kinda also took me on2 one of them roads..come on..every1 has been in a similiar situation ..right?

i was expecting that the civic will stop at the next corner. two kids will come out from a nearby school and say mum... ur late... and fx walay ki gandi ho jaiee gi. but anyways this was also a fun reading. keep it up.

plus rather than civic - i would go for silver bmw 330i, and rather than shahrah e faisal/consititution avenue, i wud prefer alexendra pde in melb.

#18 by yasirz on August 29, 2004 2:50pm PT

Just being funny.... no offence otherwise...

ur writing is stupid! why dont u go to hell!

Third world country...not only is that redundant but it`s also pretty offensive.BE creative

btw whats with the Canadian Flag? just curious....

The class divide has been illustrated. The smart middle-classers continue to be marginalized in social circles by those heralding from elitist backgrounds. Elitist themselves, the middle-classers face great trouble in being accepted by the upper-strata. A bachi smoking with aplomb, donning eastern clothes with a western nonchalance, being a reckless driver, inside a car which is a status symbol; symptomatic of the quintessential search of the middle-class`er to permeate into the elite circles. the purposeless pursuit is complete when the two go their ways; the protagonist not stooping to the levels of the semi-educated middle class and lower class youth, who are typified by their gelled hair, sleeveless skin-fitted shirts, a bike or a car with a cheesy bumper sticker, and a tendency of letting fly loose chits with their numbers and hotmailn addresses to clifton`ish chicks, who`s supposed western leanings make them easier to bait.

also, the music, the cigarette, and the FX, a direct descendant of Daru`s car, all signify an elitist middle-class mentality.

the piece is interesting, but my being a karachiite makes it easy for me.

the story of every relationship, here
starts in a car.

could be shorter

#13 by nikki7777 on August 27, 2004 10:57am PT
#5...yasirz.....check out www.hondacarindia.com............the seventh generation honda accord

Third world blokes fighting over a pea sized car....... silly....

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seriously needed to be shorter.
you`ve got a knack for being descrptive and evoking emotions that ppl can relate to, you know the cigarettes the cassette the screeching i could almost hera it.
but it rambled on a bit much, you woulda kept my attention if it had been half of what it was, i skipped thru the middle and read the end.
heres a thing, towards the end, sure it doesnt need a lesson or a profound conclusion but im the kinda perosn who needs a point.
some point, any point, a thought, a question, an answer. you know?

The fun of living in the north is that you can get the chassis of a 70s Mark II (amazingly impressive vehicle), have it fitted with a Toyota B2 engine (the one they have in the flying coaches) and go to Peshawar and buy a 2 stage turbocharger for Rs. 6,000; and you have the meanest machine on the road. You could beat the pants off of a Civic 1.8L on Constitution Avenue in Islamabad.

And all this will cost you around 100K rupees, not a bad deal at all.

Regards,
Irfan.

As a student of the psychology of Semantics, I can rationalise this story differently. The Civic and the Girl represent the Social Upper Classes of Karachi, whereas our hero represents the Middle Class with all its audacities and humdrums. The FX and Civic represent this divide, why did the author resort to such extreme examples. The girl is shown to be a symbol of attraction, yet the author infuses the idea of a smoking girl which is an elitist domain (as yet). These are subtle differences, the big clue is in the competition that the author focuses on. The Civic vs FX race and who will beat who. Typically we would expect some form of nausea around the FX, but the author show no love towards his battered FX, infact there is a complete lack of emotion between the author and his vehicle, and in some cases almost hints contempt. The Girl in this is mainly used to give it a romantic angle, thats all she is used for, although the story tries to focus in on her, the author somehow keeps slipping that focus on the Civic.

There is a great Class Maelstorm in the writer`s mind and his references to the city`s posher areas renforces this. His write up represents this storm behind the lines. I personally dont know whether to rate it for it`s social commentary or take it in the spirit of slapstick.

I know this is pedantic, but i guess we all view things differently. My only advice would be to learn his FX, learning the lesson from Albert Camus`s Myth of Sysphus.

Nice story... a little long though. Could do with some cutting down.

``Army of Me`` by Bjork - good song.

well u surely made me nostalgic :) stick with the FX ......and Malboro.... ;)

im pretty sure a civic doesnt cost as much as an accord in India...unless honda is selling civics marketed(disguised) as accords!a V6 for the price of a V4..dream on

Its funny..At first the honda civic ..was well a honda Civic.Then Honda launched a new engine variant called Vtec hence civic was affectionately referred to as a Vti.Then came the latest version called oriel which for all im concerned has gotten smaller and been installed with different headlights.But its cooler to have an Oriel rather than a Vti or an Exi.
Its the SAME DAMN CAR you %#%#$%!

Anyway i drive an 86 corrolla hatchback so i should keep my moouth shut.:)

#2 by nikki7777 on August 26, 2004 2:10pm PT you said, #1...Yeah.Isn`t the Civic a luxury car in pakistan??.Why don`t you go across the border and buy an indian built Honda Accord for the same amount of dough???............

I say ``Why don`t you cross the border to Pakistan and sit on our big you know what! (no problem regardless of your sex, we can provide both)

Is this the level you want to talk? why don`t you stick to the realities and once in a while talk for the sake of discussion ?

well, this is custom-built for karachi, so i hope you`re happy

nice read Adnan..It is very refreshing to read something written for the sheer pleasure of writing..without any agendas..or morals or anything.

really is accord costs the same .. i.e 1.268 million rs in india ..

wish we had better ties with india :P

well well article seems to remind me of Moth Smoke ...

the thing i hated about `moth smoke` was all its action was in lahore ...

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Should I go buy me a Civic?

Read like a car promotion.