A Space of One’s Own

beena:

way back i recall you did a column about your biking days in lahore...so the tide is turning...albeit ever so slowly...

and this appears at a time when the marathon is in the news

fight sis fight!...do not let the abdul-hates cow you down

lve

t

And the spaces we shall claim! and it would also be nice to see more couples about holding hands.
The word should be spread out to women.


Peace

Apparently you ladies have missed watching couples make out on the beaches... I mean make out, not just fool around.

But I agree, women should be able to walk fearlessly wherever they wished. The issue has more to do with security than the conservative masses. These masses watch more vulgar Indian movies than the DHS crowd, thus couldn`t care less about women strolling on the beaches and parks. Most of the detested `less than DHS/Clifton crowd` wouldn`t dare to confront the city`s feminine elite.

It`s usually the sexually deprived beat patrol and their criminal cohorts that cause ANYONE - man or woman - in the country to be afraid outside.

Muslim women are not forbidden from being outside, as long as they`re dressed according to the Islamic code. By that measure, even men are not supposed to be walking around half naked as they are seen today.

Women should also be encouraged to participate in sports, but not at the expense of their dignity. The male spectators unrelated to the athletes should not be allowed to witness the sport (though one can`t do anything about the tele) as they add more to disruption than to the spirit of the sport. Whether one believes it or not, most male spectators are not interested in the quality of the game or the individual female athletes` skills. Ironically, one can`t do anything about it, as it is human nature.

One could argue it is due to lack of education, ignorance, etc. But the fact remains, even in US and Europe educated male spectators attend girl`s sports for the same reasons; just watch the numbers of male and female spectators at beach volley ball, tennis, (ice) hockey, etc. Universally, the sports that flash more flesh attract more male spectators.

Mullahs are just the scapegoat. In spite of the fact that millions of people lost their lives and property for a country where their children could practice Islam freely, the mullahs have failed to capitalize on that strength from day one. So, their cries are basically empty rhetorics out of the wilderness.

I`ll be the first male with my mother, wife, and daughter to Take Back the Night. But first things first - we need to take back the country from the embedded criminal elements. Only then my girls will be able to walk freely and more confidently with all the women in the country, as it belongs to them just as much as it belongs to men.

Freedom for humans should not be formulated sans innate human nature. Otherwise results will never be same as desired.

But that`s only my observation.

m`as-salaam

nts:

Apparently you ladies have missed watching couples make out on the beaches... I mean make out, not just fool around.

q1: what is the point of bringing this here
q2: when did you witness this making out
q3: what did you do about it?

rgds

t

Beena,

``I think it`s time that women in Pakistan also took back our public spaces``.

Who knows when and if that day will come. Women in Pakistan have to deal with a lot of bullshit. First of all, they have to have the approval of the male members of the family namely father and brothers to do anything be it in the house or outside. Then the whole community steps in like a censor board curbing whatever they believe is threatening to them.
Taking back public spaces may be an option for like a miniscule portion of the society but if that happens just on that minor level maybe it will pave way for a few more.

It is all about empowering ourselves. Women empowering women is an option that may ensure freedom of choice and power for women.

ASSALAMO ALAIKUM!
Well i fully agree with temporal,
the thing which my country need today is education,awareness and implementation of LAW.As i see my poorest village on this planet( im saying it with some authority as i m working overseas in africa) the poor khallas,phuepees and other bee amman`s in my mainwali,v need to educate the men first simultaneously with women ,so as to know their rights n other rights,thats the only way not women but my mother ,sis,wife n daughter will hav enough public spaces in this country
hav good health n ALLAH`S MERCY AMEEN

Re: # 3

Syed Uncle,

If educated people like you talk such rubbish then what about the uneducated and the mullahs who are educated only in kuran?

If these guys can disrupt a girls marathon then I shouldnt be surprised if you bar your daughter from participating in sports.

You say men shouldnt not be allowed to witness women sports; just a hypothetic que:

If the authorities make an exception and allow you as the only man to witness your mini-skirted daughter play tennis, would you go? And in that case would your daughter be ``expending`` her dignity?

[I`ll be the first male with my mother, wife, and daughter to Take Back the Night]

Aila! Dont you get it? Your daughter doesnt want to come with you to take back that damned night. She`d rather go with her boyfriend to a dim-lit restaurant/pub/disco and make out... I mean make out, not just fool around :)

Cheers
Kishore

ntsyed,

.......... you are a very very sick man if you really belive that `` most male spectators are not interested in the quality of the game or the individual female athletes` skills........... my friend, you have much bigger problems than you realize !!!! ......... please think about it - it is not healthy .......

I am not going to doubt Beena but after having lived a major part of my life around Clifton and defense, I feel that her knowledge of Seaview is not very accurate. (Though my visits after 1983 were rare).There was never bad times there and it was always full of families and single girls walking by on the sort of board walk. Someone remembers the ship that came ashore on Seaview? My brother’s apt was just across the street from there.
I still remember some delightful evenings there.

ntsyed,
You are sick! But what more can we expect from a religious nutcase.

I tend to agree with Syed Uncle that many men go to women sports just to enjoy the glam display. And that`s nothing to be ashamed of. ( Tennis fans may not, but beach volleyball? Dont kid me now) Women`s Tennis association actually advised players to dress sexily to attract crowds.

But Syed uncle IS a sick man because he likes to watch young couples making out on beaches. And that`s really really sick. Sir, you should be giving these people privacy they want. You should be ashamed to snooping around invading others` privacy.

Cheers
Kishore

Beena nice reading.
# 6,
the poor khallas,phuepees and other bee amman`s in my mainwali,v need to educate the men first simultaneously with women ,so as to know their rights n other rights,thats the only way not women but my mother ,sis,wife n daughter will hav enough public spaces in this country.` right you are only mothers can play the role educate for this matter to their sons.
waise,
MANY PEOPLE THINK THAT CONFIDENCE COME ONLY WITH EDUCATION BUT THAT IS NOT THE CASE. Few days back I saw a sindah villege’s woman on Karachi airport .she came elegantly with the bundle of cotton over her head. she sat in lounge confidently ,least bother about the smart and fashionable people around her. I thought she is the best example of who I am.
Look at Muhktar mai ,the way she is facing the trial.
so fight back and get the space.

#7
*applause*

#4

hey t,

a) the point is it happens, if you`re connected to the ones who wield power so the beast ... sorry, beat partol could protect you

b) irrelevant to this discussion

c) irrelevant to this discussion

Re: #5

sajal, you`re absolutely right - women must have the power granted to them by Allah. At the same time, men (religious & secular) should give up the extra powers they have taken without anyone`s permission.

The solution should be to take away the weapons from the agressor, instead of arming the defender too. Otherwise, the result may never be amicable and peaceful.

re #8

hamid, nice to see again.

Dear friend, thanks for the advice, I`ll look into it again. meanwhile, I think denial is more unhealthy.

Cheers

re: various

To answer your curiosity about my watching some secular nut cases making out in public in Pakistan, I would take my childhood approach when I came upon a couple of dogs going at it - throw stones to break them up and find a secure private place, before a young child witnesses and pukes on them.