The Daily Mullah

``In a democracy people get the government that they deserve``.

If the mullahs have been elected by the masses then that is what the masses want.

By the way is it true that Qazi Hussain Ahmad`s daughter and son-in-law are US citizens and live in the states?

...hahaha....this is hilarious....

++

#17 by Cemendtaur on October 30, 2002 10:30am PT
Allegedly from the Daily Times (www.dailytimes.com.pk) but can`t find
the link.

++

The link:

http://www.dailytimes.com.pk/default.asp?page=story_29-10-2002_pg3_6

-einsteinwallah

Okay, I admit that I am the village idiot who didn`t get the joke - if it was a joke. If it was a political statement then jokes can be written with changed charactersunder changed circumstances; for example the character of vice chancellor can be changed with Prof. Mushtri Bai who is checked on her progress on how she is teaching kathak nauch to her students, we can call it ``nauch test``. The advertisement section can also be changed with adds like ``HOT, LIVE, NUDE GIRLS........check our stock of newly arrived, freshly kidnapped, virgin girls....come visit Governor House Punjab``...........oh wait a minute......that ain`t a joke.....that actually happened, isn`t it?. Like I said I am the village idiot who can`t make a joke and cant get one.

i found this piece tragic, not comic.

Nice piece, Noman. It was worth storing for 9 years. Quite hilarious. The idea to use a newspaper to portray your imagination is pretty cool. I liked the ``bonus effigy`` idea :)

Farhan

Allegedly from the Daily Times (www.dailytimes.com.pk) but can`t find
the link.

C.



Confessions of a reluctant feminist

By Asim Ghani



A newspaper letter-writer recently voiced alarm at the prospect of
Maulana
Fazlur Rahman becoming prime minister. He said he`d emigrate to Papua
New
Guinea if that happened. Since then there has been a spate of similar
letters. Qazi Husain Ahmad`s statement last Sunday that the Muttahida
Majlis-e-Amal would abolish coeducation can make you wonder if it`s
really
time to leave this country.

The most striking thing in the Qazi`s speech, at an MMA ``women`s
convention``
in Peshawar, is not so much this threat, as the fact that he doesn`t
know
what he`s talking about. ``We will set up separate universities for
girls,``
he declared; the same, needless to say, goes for schools and
colleges. He
promised vocational training centres exclusively for women. Qazi
Husain
Ahmad must have worked out the astronomical expenses involved, the
planning,
infrastructure and the years and years of completion required, the
female
teaching staff that would need to be raised for segregated vocational
and
technical training.

It reminds me of a news item a few weeks ago, on a decision in the
NWFP, the
Qazi`s home province, to convert all government schools into English-
medium
schools. And who will teach all the subjects in English, as well as
the
language itself?

Staff who will have received six months` training in Peshawar. For
some
reason he left unexplained, he wants the NWFP Governor`s House and
Frontier
House, the chief minister`s residence, tu rned into educational
institutions;
for girls and women, let`s assume, because of the high walls of the
buildings.

And that`s the leader of the Jamaat-e-Islami, Pakistan`s best-
organized
political party. He`s vice president of the MMA, some of whose
important
figures are claiming the alliance`s unforeseen success in the
elections has
given it a popular mandate to rule Pakistan.

But something clearly slipped the Qazi`s mind in the heat of rhetoric.

He pledged that women would have equal opportunities and ``there will
be no
job restrictions`` on them. (Thank goodness!) In addition, women will
be
provided ``a conducive atmosphere in which to work with dignity.`` If
you
carry his philosophy on female education to its logical conclusion,
doesn`t
it follow that, if women are to work ``with dignity,`` workplaces will
be
segregated too?

For women (indeed, for anyone) dignity is synonymous with equality—
complete
equality, it should be emphasized here, since wome n`s status and
rights are
under discussion. But in wide areas of the NWFP we saw a
different ``dignity``
in action on Oct. 10. Women, including innumerable in the city of
Peshawar
itself, were strictly prohibited from voting, the prevention involving
threatened draconian measures in the tribal areas even against any
male who
dared to help a woman go to a polling station. The Jamaat leader, who
immediately after the elections had sworn to have the heads of ``the
daughters of the nation`` covered, came up with a tardy criticism of
this; it
was, he said in his speech, ``wrong.``

How many MMA legislators-elect in the NWFP kept their wives,
daughters,
mothers and sisters from voting is an interesting moot point.
The ``wrong``
happened to be the right thing for the MMA: we`ll never know to what
extent
the absence of women voters contributed to its electoral success.
(This is
to say nothing of allegations that the MMA`s ``vote bank`` was swollen
by
hundreds of thousands of Afgha n refugees who had illegally secured
Pakistani
national identity cards.)

``There will be no restrictions on women,`` the Qazi went on, ``but they
have
to live in accordance with the teachings of Islam.`` This ``but`` raises
a
question: Does it mean men will be free not to follow the teachings?

The MMA will also end honour killings, which the Qazi did condemn as
``un-Islamic.`` Meanwhile, laws will be passed to stop violence against
females and ``sexual harassment of women.`` To take only the latter
element,
what could be greater ``sexual harassment`` than for a woman to be
raped and
then be condemned to die for adultery? Zafran Bibi, whose punishment
of
being stoned to death was overturned by the Federal Shariat Court in
June
amid national and international outrage, was not the only such victim
of
Zia-ul-Haq`s Zina and Hudood laws. There are a number of rape victims
in
prison even now.

But the defence of Zia`s ultra-obscurantist legislations is an
article of
fait h with Pakistan`s religious right. Zafran`s case, the Meerawala
gang
rape and the forced ``marriages`` of eight girls in Abbakhel near
Mianwali,
which again caused universal uproar, were met with virtual silence by
our
clerics. (It doesn`t bear reminding that the annulled marriages of the
girls—two as young as three and five—had been duly solemnized by a
local
maulvi.)

It was a little redundant for the Jamaat leader to give this
assurance to
the thousands of burqa-clad women bussed to the convention
(whose ``massive
participation`` he flaunted as proof of the MMA`s popularity among
women):
that the MMA won`t force them to wear the burqa. Nor would it carry
out a
Taliban-style crackdown on women. Let`s skip the fact that he isn`t
known to
have uttered a word of criticism of the Taliban`s hideous
victimization of
women, that the Jamaat and most other parties now in the MMA provided
all-round backing to the militia`s five-year ``jihad.`` Let`s recall the
incident in whic h the Taliban shaved the heads of Pakistani football
players
to punish them for turning up in ``immodest`` shorts for a match, not in
shalwar. Maulana Fazlur Rahman, the prime ministerial hopeful who is
the
unanimous parliamentary leader of all six components of the MMA (as
the Qazi
reminded the convention), lauded the abuse.

Again, since his audience were all in burqa, why did Qazi husain
Ahmad have
to be behind a curtain? You see, even if he couldn`t see the women,
they
could have seen him through their veils. But he`s one of the most
photographed Pakistani figures these days, and also appears on
television,
so they can see his face anyway. It would be silly to say to him, if
you`re
so punctilious about purdah, why don`t you stay away from
photographers and
television? However, he could avoid posing for photographs, such as
the one
in which, in a show of MMA solidarity, he`s linking arms with Maulana
Shah
Ahmad Noorani, the president of the transient grouping of di sparate
religious parties and factions. Normally he would be loath even to
pray
behind the Maulana, a veteran prayer-leader, because he is Barelvi
and the
Qazi is Wahabi.

Since the Jamaat leader is an unlikely convert to the idea of equal
opportunities for women, here`s a shibboleth to test his earnestness:
Is one
woman, or two women, equal to a male witness in testimony?

I don`t know how my fellow-alarmists reacted to the Qazi`s speech. I
laughed
out loud—particularly at his addressing women from behind a curtain.

Thought:

Did Mush go to Saudi Arabia to meet Nawaz sharif? Another of those
``chance encounters``?

You have to ask that. Why go to Saudi now? when there is constitutional
crisis back at home?

Send this article to www.theonion.com! Hahah this is great..

Very funny.

Send a lifetime subscription to 12 head.

The rise of the religious parties in Pakistan can be construed as a matter of concern, but not as a cause of immediate panic. The rise of the religious parties in Pakistan or for that matter the world is not new; from the MMA in Pakistan to the BJP in India to Labor in Israel to the Republican party in the United States.

The funny thing about the election is that there is alot of hue and cry, about the religious parties coming to power, from the middle class of Pakistan. It is the same middle class that likes to crow about democracy, sitting in its drawing rooms sipping scotch whisky and claiming that there is no point to go out and vote, because the elections are already pre-rigged. Then they complain, because they do not like the results and want the the military nullify the results by pulling ``an Algeria in Pakistan``.

How ironic! The so-called champions of democracy want to end democracy, because they do not like the results of democracy.

Is denying power to the MMA worth the cost of killing this fragile rebirth of democracy in Pakistan as personified by this new parliament? How many times, will Pakistan kill democracy before it finally kills it? Yes; this is a flawed and a limited democracy, but isn`t a flawed and limited democracy better than no democracy?

Personally speaking, I want this parliament despite all its flaws to serve out its full term and I want the military to let them make the mess of the whole situation if they want, because democracy is the right of the people to make the wrong choice if they wish. The middle class or the pseudo intelligentsia of Pakistan needs to realize that it does not have all the answers and it should learn to trust the opinion of its fellow citizens or they might part ways with the Islamic Republic of Pakistan and drift off in the footsteps of Bangladesh. Pakistan cannot have a democracy if each democratic government is aborted, because a minority opinion does not agree with its intentions. It is through mistakes and self-awareness that comes from those mistakes that the real essence of democracy takes root and not through dictation by a self-appointed messiah promising salvation.

Governments derive their legitimacy from the consent of the governed and if the MMA and its ilk wishes to ban the cable; abolish co-education and revive sharia in Pakistan, and the people of Pakistan consent to it, then they have a right to implment those policies. If on the other hand, the people of Pakistan do not consent to these policies, then they a have a right to vote them out of office in the next elections and not to engineer a situation, which forces this parliament out of power.

The difference between the MMA and the Taliban was that the Taliban were enforcing their diktat, without the consent of the governed, but if the people of Baluchistan and NWFP consent to the policies of MMA, then the MMA has a duty to implement those policies, because that is the reason, why they were elected to office. That is the essence of democracy - what the people want from their representatives.

To all those, who are mortified by the rise of the religious parties and are thinking of leaving Pakistan for more secular shores, I would suggest that please have the tolerance and the faith in the decisons and the opinions of your fellow citizens and relax and sit back and enjoy the Mad Circus and its dysfunctional performers! LOL

Ciao

Follwing is from dawn of today.

At last the monstrocity created by TNT is coming into final shape.

Of government directives




By Hafizur Rahman


The ministry of religious affairs has circulated copies of an ordinance prohibiting eating and drinking in public during Ramazan and prescribing imprisonment and fine for those who break the law. Wasn`t God`s own law enough? Why create the impression that people will be more afraid of the state than of the Almighty?

Well, i guess you dont pray behind a Mullah ? and who will lead your namaz-e-janaza ? or are you going to be cremated like nm rashid?

ROLE OF PAK MILITARY,

There was a time pakistanis maintained that they need a large military to contain india, especially following the dismemberment in 1971.

After the recent elections and the explicit emergence of jihadists as a political force, almost all of pakistanis have found a new role for the military, now they are telling that military will ensure that pakistan will not become a jihadic state. A good example is post 2 below. All of the educated of pakistan with some liberal views and who were critical of the military now find the military as the most progressive, saviours of their country. What these fail to realise is the surge of jihadic forces in pakistan, the education system and the institutionalisation of hatred towards ahmadias and other religions. Already there are quite afew jihadists in the military and if the education system is not altered, and the hatred driven values of the pak society is not altered it is very unlikely that the military can contain a jihadic take over.

Pakistanis do not want to take any responsibility, they have left it for the military. Why not an article about abdus salam. Whay not about lala lajpat roys house in lahore. No pakistani, even when settled in the US will not dare, cannot underestimate the reach of ISI.

All that is needed for the educated in pakistan is to go out to the street and listen carefully, through the hum and buzzle and the cocophony of a bastardised language, one can hear the chant from the approaching mob, lailaha illalla, pakistan ka matlab kya.

Military cannot answer this, may be some educated pakistani can.

HAHHAHAHA

truly hilarious! though you`re probably giving some mullah`s ideas here.....next thing you know there`ll be a ``lota squad`` knocking at your door! :)

Although this piece is funny and extreme, would life be much different from this under the Jama`at-e-Islami??? I doubt it. This does paint a certain picture of how life would be and it scares me.