Saeed Jaffer March 23, 1998
#7 Posted by ac on July 19, 1998 2:14:00 pm
I think I can relate to your article. After
dating and being in relationships I gave up
on finding a match. I was totally against the
desi match making customs but in the end had
to rely on it and ended up getting engaged with
someone in Pakistan.
So, Dr. Sahib no harm in helping and setting
up people with potential matches. Its all
about networking.
#6 Posted by gsm on July 19, 1998 2:14:00 pm
``alliances from eligible good-looking Tamilian girls who are software engineers (B.E only)``
My oh My! Such specificity. Such a narrow
criteria. How about simply ``a human being``
as a friend and partner for life! Why restrict
yourself to one nationality and one occupation?
My oh My! Such specificity. Such a narrow
criteria. How about simply ``a human being``
as a friend and partner for life! Why restrict
yourself to one nationality and one occupation?
#5 Posted by optimist on July 17, 1998 11:38:01 am
What so wrong in match-making anyway?? We were a group of 5 girls at the Uni. Four of us are married now and we all hooked each other up! Now all four of us are living happy married lives. I hooked one of my friends up with another friend even when I wasn`t married and that was perfectly OK. That`s caring for other people just in case people are forgetting about those kind of things! So what if it`s a little hassle and 50 phone calls!! Look what you get at the end of the day when you see somebody happy.
Jaffar Sahab, being a doctor you should know this too unless it`s something personal!!
Jaffar Sahab, being a doctor you should know this too unless it`s something personal!!
#4 Posted by saeed jaffer on March 31, 1998 4:57:19 pm
[Sigh] ...
Osama is correct. Yes, I was being sarcastic with the last remark in the article.
I humbly request that people please do not email me with matchmaking requests. The whole point of the article was that I DO NOT KNOW HOW OR WANT TO KNOW HOW TO MAKE MATCHES.
Thanks for the interest in the article though. I am sure few will read it after tomorrow once it slips off the front page of Chowk ... aaaaiaiiieieeee!!!
Osama is correct. Yes, I was being sarcastic with the last remark in the article.
I humbly request that people please do not email me with matchmaking requests. The whole point of the article was that I DO NOT KNOW HOW OR WANT TO KNOW HOW TO MAKE MATCHES.
Thanks for the interest in the article though. I am sure few will read it after tomorrow once it slips off the front page of Chowk ... aaaaiaiiieieeee!!!
#3 Posted by Osama Ahmed on March 27, 1998 3:33:41 pm
People seem to be missing the point (and the humor) here. I dont think Dr Jaffer is starting a marriage agency any time soon (nor I think will Chowk have a marriage bureau run by Dr. Jaffer any time soon, yes?). I think the plight of the US based desi awaiting marriage is very real and is well captured in this article as coming from someone (previously) unsympathetic to their travails.
I really dont see how people can take the last line of the article or the ``Editor`s note`` in earnest!
I really dont see how people can take the last line of the article or the ``Editor`s note`` in earnest!
#2 Posted by Observer on March 24, 1998 2:47:10 pm
``Marriage is legalized Prostitution``
Bernard Shaw may have said it for his color and set of people and for those who believe and quote him. STOP commiting adultery with your wives/prostitutes!!!!!!!!
Bernard Shaw may have said it for his color and set of people and for those who believe and quote him. STOP commiting adultery with your wives/prostitutes!!!!!!!!
#1 Posted by Syed Ahmed on March 22, 1998 3:03:52 pm
Between ( academic) degrees and pedigrees, match making is certainly an ardous process :-). Let us not forget the family minefields, cousin traps and other familial suprises.
Of course unreasonable expectations act as catalyst for this volatile mixture. Marriages in our culture are probably one of the few avenues of social mobility in a very class conscious culture.( aside from jobs in Police, Custom or Excise depts). Between the ``plastic surgeon`` ( male) and barbie doll (female)( desi version thereof) there is little room for manouveribilty.
Matriarachs and/or patriarchs` ( whatever the case maybe`` ) often find these
the perfect oppurtunities to compensate for their
own inadequacies in finding a partner for their ``naive`` offspring.
Interestingly though there are so many things in
flux like the ages of the prospective spouses, their job status - and sometimes even their academic credentials. Personally, I have yet to figure out ``20-ish`` .
Then there are hurdles of religious denominations, and in certain circles caste
and baradari fences.
Then we reach the meat mart - Short Balding overweight men need not apply. Dark, short and
intelligent ( ``Taaez``) girls need not apply
as well.
Once that is done, we have psychological warfare
between the two parties ( in laws) and once they have reached detente, the marriage proceeds - hopefully with a fight or two over the marraige
idiosyncracies.
And finally there is the miserable couple, who will curse you for the rest of their lives, and if they have good legal counsel, probably try to make it all worthwile. - So beware and carry malpractice insurance.
So you see sir, Match making is a hazardous profesion, personally I would prefer practising proctology in a maximum security penitentiary to
be more tasteful :-).
Of course unreasonable expectations act as catalyst for this volatile mixture. Marriages in our culture are probably one of the few avenues of social mobility in a very class conscious culture.( aside from jobs in Police, Custom or Excise depts). Between the ``plastic surgeon`` ( male) and barbie doll (female)( desi version thereof) there is little room for manouveribilty.
Matriarachs and/or patriarchs` ( whatever the case maybe`` ) often find these
the perfect oppurtunities to compensate for their
own inadequacies in finding a partner for their ``naive`` offspring.
Interestingly though there are so many things in
flux like the ages of the prospective spouses, their job status - and sometimes even their academic credentials. Personally, I have yet to figure out ``20-ish`` .
Then there are hurdles of religious denominations, and in certain circles caste
and baradari fences.
Then we reach the meat mart - Short Balding overweight men need not apply. Dark, short and
intelligent ( ``Taaez``) girls need not apply
as well.
Once that is done, we have psychological warfare
between the two parties ( in laws) and once they have reached detente, the marriage proceeds - hopefully with a fight or two over the marraige
idiosyncracies.
And finally there is the miserable couple, who will curse you for the rest of their lives, and if they have good legal counsel, probably try to make it all worthwile. - So beware and carry malpractice insurance.
So you see sir, Match making is a hazardous profesion, personally I would prefer practising proctology in a maximum security penitentiary to
be more tasteful :-).
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