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Upon the return of a Desi

Ayesha Khan April 22, 1998

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#10 Posted by kh on June 15, 1998 1:14:56 pm
I agree to a great extet with this article. It is especially true that a person`s individuality always clashes with the more ``group``/``us`` thinking in Pakistan. Infact, those of us not willing to adhere to the ``us`` thinking all of the time are labeled rebellious and ``AZAAD``. I think group thinking can really be a hazard sometimes because everybody seems to be doing the same thing for the wrong reasons i.e. because ``it is done here``, ``that is what we do/are``.
Well guess what! ever heard of CHANGE for the better. No wonder we are still stuck in the colonial era. Still adhereing to customs that do not make sense ( a lot of matrimonial ``rasmain`` come to mind) and are not even Islamic. Apparently this is so because of the Indian influence which again our society is unwilling to free itself from because ``Yeh to hota Hai``, ``yeh to karna parta hai``.
Any way, you touched upon some very good themes.
O and by the way, why the hell is everybody so obsessed with ``accent``. I have been a victim of this and everytime i am around someone fresh from pakistan i have to deliberately alter my accecnt so they dont think i am ``showing off``. Accept people as they are Yaar!
Its really not the accent that is important its what is being said.

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#9 Posted by Asim on April 29, 1998 9:06:56 am
Re : Amir Hanif

Amir,
Good analysis!!! Many of us would admit to what you have said in public, about being ``morons``, but would be too much of a coward to admit it. It takes certain emotional and inmtellectual development on our part to come out of our insecurities, and admit our shortcomings, and try to do something positive to get over them!!!

I liked the way you expressed your perception of Pakistan, not be belittled by the ``awe`` of Umreeka, we all seem to harbour, once we get out there!!

Kind Regards

Asim

P.S Ayesha, you wrote well and some of the observations were right on the mark!!!

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#8 Posted by Zee on April 25, 1998 9:01:37 am
RE: Sabrina.

I agree with your point of view to an extent. When I would see people trying to flaunt there american accent, especially back in Pakistan, I found it very vulgar. It is artificial. And thats why I never wanted to say schedule in the american way. But things change when you work with them year after year. You pick up the accent without even realizing it and yes, I think Beatnik is right here that people acquire accent in an effort to fit in.

Zee

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#7 Posted by Beatnik on April 25, 1998 7:16:57 am
Re. Sabrina,

``Accent does not presuppose proper usage of the English language.``

I agree with you. However, the perception is that people from non-english speaking countries don`t speak english properly. Case in point, a person speaking grammatically incorrect english with a perfect British (Australian, et al) accent is often perceived to be speaking the language ``properly`` - even in the US. Take a desi in the US who speaks grammatically correct english with a ``foreign`` accent and he/she is invariably perceived as not speaking correctly.

Incidently, the reverse is also true. That is, Pakistanis often judge a person`s command of Urdu (and English) by his/her accent. Punjabis and Pathans (and other ethnic groups and westerners) are often criticized for not speaking Urdu correctly.

I think most people adopt accents (however artificial) out of a neccessity to be understood and to avoid repeating themselves - it is a matter pragmatism, atleast in the US.

Sadly, in life, sometimes style is given more importance than substance.



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#6 Posted by sabrina on April 25, 1998 12:04:06 am
Re:Zee.

What is this desi preoccupation with acquiring American accents? I have never understood how it was possible anyways? Most of these people who do try, end up sounding artificial and quite pathethic especially when they claim they are speaking ``properly`` and I can hear not:) Maybe you did not mean to imply whatever I am saying below but I`m saying it anyways. Accent does not presuppose proper usage of the English language.

Many a times, I have innocently remarked to a few people on how I was unable to detect any foreign accent in them at all. It almost always is taken as a compliment to my amusement since I know I never meant it as one.

If anything, I find English spoken with a tinge of desi accent is always rather sexy. Especially those with the mix between RP English and that unmistakable accent accompanying it. But perhaps, I am a little biased as well...

Hey, people just love French accented English, so why not the desi accent?

sabrina.

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#5 Posted by gsm on April 24, 1998 8:10:20 pm
The only thing I can say is that being a desi is a state of mind. I`ve lived in the US for almost
half a century now and have gone back many times to Pakistan for short visits. I have never felt
like a ``misfit`` either here or there. Best advice
I can give is to follow the olden tired yet timeless and precious dictum: ``when in Rome, do as
Romans do``. It has always worked for me!

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#4 Posted by Zee on April 24, 1998 1:16:54 pm
Very good article.
How important it is to conform to the corporate life in America? It`s absolutely essential to your success and hence, we need to act out a dual role. At work, your are Airfan; at home, your are same old Irfaan. It grows on you even if you don`t like it or realize it. I came to US thinking I will never talk in American accent but with years, I see myself doing other wise.
So we are always looked down here as quirky and strange, whether any body says that or not. We know we are second class citizens, admit it or not. Now when this same person goes back home, thats the time to feel really first class and people treat you like that too. So again, we act out what peolple expect from us as well as take all the frustration we were harbouring. But we don`t like to admit to doing so, so we say we don`t fit in anymore.

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#3 Posted by MNI on April 24, 1998 5:21:35 am
I wanted to say this for a couple of days but couldn`t get around to writing.

``We are at that stage of this evolution where we have wholeheartedly embraced western products, services and images but we still cling to our own basic eastern and religious values``

I think you have accurately pointed out our misfortune. We rush to adopt a Western lifestyle thereby making Uncle Sam richer and ourselves poorer. And what IMO we should COPY -the foundational principles of Western democracies- we actively oppose. Of course the developed world has an interest in our consuming McDonald`s, Levi`s and coke and they push all of this on us. And they don`t give two hoots about democracy, secularism or any other principle if it doesn`t suit their global interests; the platitudes of the State Dept. spokesmen notwithstanding.

Of course we can`t blame everything on the West. There`s one who fools, but there`s one who is fooled. WE should IMO fix out priorities. Nike is not as important as secularism and democratic principles.

My only objection is that you characterize secular humanism and democracy as a Western value. That is simply incorrect. We do know that there was some form of democracy in other societies. The concept of ``Bai`at`` or ``bai`ah`` in Islamic history is a democratic concept, even if it is flawed democracy. Similarly, many ``Muslims`` were secular humanists (e.g. Muhammad b. Zakaria al-Razi and Abul `ala al-Ma`arri) when they were still burning witches in the West. Secular humanism is a universal value. If we project it as a Western import we`d be wrong about history. More importantly, we`ll raise all those social barriers that spring up out of sheer xenophobia.

Rgds
MNI

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#2 Posted by Amin Saleh on April 22, 1998 1:30:45 pm
Mr. Iqbal

I think before you get defensive about Pakistani goods you should read my comments carefully. I have a lactose intolerant system (and this is not to say that I did not have that when I left Pakistan). The problem is that since this condition is not life threatening in most, not a lot has been done in Pakistan to alleviate the problems (via having medicine available or special processed dairy products).

As far as cornflakes are concerned, Pakistan`s Fauji Cornflakes are as bad as Mexican Mangoes (here I compare them to Pakistani Mangoes). The only thing I can say is that you have to try it to understand what I am saying.

As far as Chat or Nihari or Student`s biryani is concerned, well those are the reasons why I go to Pakistan. Yet I will agree with Mr. Rizvi that if one is not careful, even residents fall sick.

Mr. A. Khan, Pakistan does not have an overall negative immigration rate. We have people coming in from Bangladesh, Afghanistan, Iran, etc. but we see the educated class moving to more affluent countries (although this is what I think you meant).

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#1 Posted by Amin Saleh on April 22, 1998 8:34:24 am
Excellent article. Not a lot of people realize that even though you may have been born and bred in Pakistan, the place did not freeze in time when you left that place a decade ago, unfreezing when you return.

People are literally shocked not only by cultural differences, but also by ``Sticker Shock`` (prices in rupee terms have gone up due to inflation), pollution, traffic jams, mammoth buildings in inappropriate places, etc.

I remember my last visit to Pakistan. Having being spoilt on Kelloggs for just 2 years I was having difficulty readjusting to Fauji Cornflakes, and ofcourse my brand of milk was also not available (lacteze free). So beware those who take things for granted here, prepare yourselves before you visit/move to Pakistan.

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Interact Index

    #10 kh
    #9 Asim
    #8 Zee
    #7 Beatnik
    #6 sabrina
    #5 gsm
    #4 Zee
    #3 MNI
    #2 Amin Saleh
    #1 Amin Saleh

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