Fishhooks

very powerful build up. but an oddly anticlimactic end.

nice work bina

Re: Bina

``Now, hurry up and pass me my fish food.``

What an admission, Bina. I don`t know what to say, let alone feel.

Re: Zehra

``read rape fantasies by margaret atwood...its a short story piece.``

Thanks for the reference. I`ll keep an eye out. This topic is disturbing at best but it impresses me to no end how much interest women have in it.

-!Kamran!-

Re: Bina, #32

I can agree with ``intelligent`` v ``brilliant``. I`m no so sure about ``artificial`` v ``damaged``, though. To me, it`s that gaping holes in their emotional and spiritual well-being, as you well put it, that forces them to be artificial. By considering them ``damaged`` you`re playing right in their hands. They get the sympathy vote!

Your story reads extremely well. I`d leave it alone and submit it.

Re: Kamran, #33

``Something in our subconscious wants us to be captivated by these charmers.`` Knowingly, and more often than not! I agree. Very perceptive!

Re: Bina, #34

I immediately believed in your innocence. A sexual hint never struck me because it was never meant to be, or I would`ve caught it! What surprised me is that you agreed to it at the first accusation. I knew you were lying then.

re: kamran..

read rape fantasies by margret atwood..its a short piece..probably can be found in nortons anthology of women writers.

im mentioning it based on your comment..a veritble rape metaphoe..or perhaps a fanstasy. she deals with what women talk of as rape fantasies.

bina...have you submitted this piece yet for the short story competition?

i have been away from chowk for not so long, yet i feel almost lost.

rizvi.

Kamran:

No! I maintain my innocence! It really didn`t strike me...I must be right-brained or something (or perhaps it was that lobotomy that robbed my of my ability to see sexual innuendo in my phrases as I write them...)

As for the Fishhook theory: you are very, very, very clever. Now, hurry up and pass me my fish food.

``I will say, though, that I really blushed when I saw the line that they`d chosen as the front page teaser.``

Well, the promoters of this website (Chowk-idars, perhaps) are no fools. They know what they`re doing. The ``soundbite`` is alive and well at chowk.com.

``I didn`t realize the double meaning until it was up there for the whole world to see...``

Sure, you didn`t, Bina. You`re no fool either. :)

``They are intelligent, talented, enormously attractive (not just in the physical sense) individuals, but they have gaping holes in their emotional and spiritual well-being.``

Often times, the gaping holes are just as big in the fish as they are in the fishhooks. This is another perspective of your theory. Something in our subconscious wants us to be captivated by these charmers. It`s not entirely healthy but it sure is irresistable. Sometimes.

-!Kamran!-

Godot: I think that you have really grasped the essence of what ``Fishhooks`` is all about. The only thing I would say, though, is that the adjectives that best suit these men - or these women - is not ``artificial and intelligent``, but ``brilliant and damaged``. They are intelligent, talented, enormously attractive (not just in the physical sense) individuals, but they have gaping holes in their emotional and spiritual well-being. They think they are very sincere, and they do manage to convince you of their sincerity...for a while. Or perhaps not, as the unfortuate protagonist of our story discovers.

Am considering entering this story in a short story competition. Please, all, let me know your thoughts on improving the piece before I submit it.

Thank you.

I think this is amazingly perceptive. Really brilliant. Terribly impressed and awed at it...

RE: Reply #28 SR

SR... precisely! It is absolutely possible that the Turkish proverb is directed at both sexes and thus, we both have strenghts and weaknesses! Someone once told me, sameness is not equivalent to equality. Never enough food for thought as knowledge is limitless :-)

=mariam=

I think successful women and men almost invariably
project persona that can rub ppl the wrong way. We often equate academic or professional success with domestic tranquility and the getting ahead syndrome - the trophy spouse ( note not wife).
- or climbing the desi caste system ......

This combined with the 20 something carte blanche attitudes ( me thinks flush with success attitudes) create the perception of camelot that is at best cursory and fleeting .....


The rest are broad generalizations.... but successful women have a much harder time than successful men in relationships coz the women are more in tune with the stability & success equations wheras the men folk concnetrate of the domestic agenda.... nice wife nice mom blah blah blah and professional success might be an immaterial criterion to them - something many successful women just dont unbderstand ( not in their 20`s anyway) .....

With age comes maturity and consequently reasonable perception of reality dawns and and you see ppl compromise on a lot more ....

zensufi #19 [``...is it directed at menor women?...``]

Is it not possible that your Turkish proverb is directed at neither gender in particular, but is for all. It uses the word (at least the way you translate) `human` and not wo/man. In some areas the strength and weakness of men and women is determined biologically. For example, men have stronger muscloskeletal systems while women have stronger immune systems. Even in the brain function there are certain distinctions. The auditory function in women while the visual function in men is better. However, when it comes to personality issues like moral, emotional and matters of will power, I don`t believe biology plays the dominant role. Furthermore, I believe, that in every man there is a hidden woman, and in every woman there is also a man. This `other` that resides deep inside our psyche may be a very tiny presence in some and a more significant one in others. Some are aware of this `Janus within` while others are oblivious. Whether it is biologically determined or culturally or both, I can`t say. (Enough ``food for thought``?)

...SR

Correction.

Please substitute `sculptor` with `sculpture` in my reply (#26). Sorry about the error!

It`s unfortunate that this beautiful piece of writing has taken a direction in some of its responses towards something totally irrelevant to the story`s theme.

It is not, and correct me, Bina, if I`m not right, about men v women, or about men fishhooks v women fishhooks. It`s about those men who are urbane, sophisticated, well-read and, yes, intelligent. These men, however, are artificial and insecure. When they meet women who are better than them, these men need to satisfy their own `superiority`. They do this by making the women feel inferior to them. Yes, these men and women do exist, and Bina absolutely wonderfully portrayed them.

This piece reminded me of a French movie I was saw in the late eighties: `Camille Claudelle`. It was a true story about the great sculpture Roden. Roden, in his artistic peak, meets a young girl, Camille, who was a better sculpture than him. She, being young and not knowing her own talent, thinks he knows better than her and falls in love with him. He has an affair with her, and, surprise!, winds up destroying her because she was a better sculpture than him. It was a wonderfully made movie which tears one`s heart apart. Bina`s story is no less artistic.

``Fishhooks`` could also be seen as a metaphor for the psychological games that men and women play with each other when they feel the need to reassure themselves about power and control in a relationship.

Sometimes we allow ourselves to be manipulated in the name of love and then there are times when in rare moments of blinding reality we see things for what they really are.Fishhooks is perhaps just such a moment.

Kamran,

Ouch! I have touched a nerve. But I do not believe and never have that men are the culprits, women the victims. Pain can run both ways.

Thanks for your positive comments. Your question as to why the scar is under her ear is very perceptive. I thought about it myself just the other day - why did I write it that way? Maybe the scar appeared under her ear because for her, her vulnerability was in listening to everything he said and trying to take it on board. If her vulnerability had been sexual, perhaps the scar would have shown up on the inside of her thigh. If it had been a violent relationship, over her ribs. I didn`t really think about it while writing it - it just seemed like the natural place for the scar to appear.

As to the eroticism of the piece - I have a lot to say about that, but I`m not so sure this is the right place to say it. I will say, though, that I really blushed when I saw the line that they`d chosen as the front page teaser. I didn`t realize the double meaning until it was up there for the whole world to see...

Looking forward to ``Female Fishhooks``.

Bina