Return of the Blob

This was excellent.

aicha hi,

sigh!! arranged marriage. yes, we still do it. end of discussion.

Plus i dont think I`ll ever be ready if I had my way. So maybe thats best. I have seen marriages with even bigger issues than this. A pregnancy that`s a little earlier than I would`ve liked is I can live with. I think!

Nice piece. Motherhood is ok when you are surrounded by relatives and servants. Alone - impossible. And the first time round - the excitement carries you thru it all i suppose - butthe second third??? Dont know how they do it.
And humourMe - pls get your husband a pet first - that spells RESPONSIBILITY !! Byt hte time he crosses that hurdle trust me - it`ll be years and by then youll be ready : ) But seriously didnt you discuss this before marraige??

Loved your piece. I am not on the same plane, as yet, but only thinking about it make me wanna curl up under the bed. Got married over a month ago, husband wants a child immediately, thats my sob story. Glad to know there are female/s out there whos thinking is as warped as mine. Couldn`t have said it better myself! Keep it coming...

Shandana,
I know how awful it feels to have junior take over your life ... guess what ... it`s even harder to let them go, and it`s sooner than you think !!
I dropped my two off at morning preschool starting today - after weeks of preparation - buying backpacks, lunch boxes, fall/winter clothes, reading books about starting preschool, playdates and open houses to get used to the class and teachers. When I dropped them off they were too busy feeding the Lucy the resident rabbit to say anything but ``UUNFF`` when I hugged them goodbye - a good sign !!
After endless dreaming about what I shall do with my free time (shop, get my hair done, sleep, read, check out jobs on monster.com etc.) I can`t think of anything to do - except worry.
As for telling baby you`re the big sis - NOT A CHANCE - the little demons can tell Mommy from 20 feet away with their eyes closed ... and they feed every 3 hours 24/7 ! Chin up and good luck to you - and do check out motherwear.com for the best nursing clothes on the planet.

Sorry Samina Behen, I put little too much top spin in my last post. This social stuff is really not my area. Basically too much planning in this area means no go. Bus ab to aap khush haiN na? How was get together today? Who was the best looking one there?
Isn`t Sunday morning a time to protest? For ending Saturday night, off course.
SameerJannatBound

Sameer Bhai,
Methinks you doth protest too much...and believe me, a child can survive two nearsighted parents....its the heavy metal music I`d get rid of...

To the best of my knowledge, I did not afther any child anywhere in this world and therefore no experience of raising children. But I have been told many times that I connect with children extremely well and for this or some other reason that I do not know, children often smile to me even in shopping malls. My friends tell me that I would be a very good father (socially, perhaps not genetically?) yet I never had urge to have my own children. Given the chance I will opt for no over one (I am talking about child here and not god) but I heard married life is a compromize. I just hope that I do not have to compromize over french fries, cheese, hamburgers, fish, soap operas, heavy metal music or anything Arabic or Hebraic.
Since I have big nose, big eyes; a person with small nose and small eyes is good for averaging out, though I am not intersted in averaging out my black hair. To minimize the chances of week eyesight and dental problems, one with glasses or braces during early age is not desired. Similarly a beedi, cigarette, pipe or cigar smoker, a paan eater with gulqand or qawam is also eliminated because of bad effects on baby. Too much sugar can make mother diabetic and increase the child becoming orphan, so no ladoo, burfi, jalebi, qalaqand, sohan halwa eater mother. Too much red meat, high colesterol for a diabetic - arteriosclerosis. Pregnancy and labor at birth can be fatal for a diabetic and arteriosclerosis mother.
Why bother anNy! Dream is often better than real world. Enjoy the only experience of being alive without testing its limits. Eat your french fries with cheese? Yuk! Better try nachos with hot salsa and chilled Heinecken.

Good luck to you!

Ras

Dear Shandana,

Ever so sorry to use your board for this. I feel like those fat- oh sorry, I meant...urm...horizontally challenged people - who come to my house just to use my toilet. I wish they would use the Grand Canyon or something.

I`m using this board `cos I can`t find the speakers` corner to:

Aliph) Congratulate the Chowk staff on their wonderful upgrade. If you read my reply to ur 5th anniversary, you`ll see that I was right all along. Nostradamus the 2nd, that`s me. Yes sir. You guys are entering into the Big Boys` league now.

Be) more importantly, what`s with the colours? Grey background and blue writing!?! NO!!!! Off-whites. Creams. Ivory. peach, zanzibar. By all means use mottled skins of warm colours. If you want a bit more class, then use metal and wood. Please refrain from tones which make me feel as if I`m in a cold storage warehouses surrounded by skinned bovine. Jesus! It`s like I`m reading the Journal of Plumbing Excellence.

Te) Is there any chance you could assign the space occupied by your headlines section and the left half of your article section to bring in the old style of presenting articles, that is, 10 articles that run down from top to bottom. The right side of the articles section could be used to shift your headlines there.

Thank you and keep rockin!
Umer M.

mmer
``And guys/gals, let me know if this is abnormal but even though I`m not married or anything, every now and then I get clucky and go through Paternal motions. Is that normal? ``

yesyes!! so good to see other cases..i too sometimes have this terrible urge to have little babies that are mine to bath and feed and fool around with...and sometimes when i see nice happy pregnant women i want to be like that too..not the other stuff that comes with it, just the being pregnant bit..its like this urge to be pregnant that causes many frowns when expressed but its very much there..how strange is that?

``Every child comes in to this world with a message that God has not lost hope with mankind`` - Rabindranath Tagore

P.S. I have been married for ten years, but am still too scared to have children. I really like the above-mentioned quote, however.......

Scout(new)???

Are you like the good ol` same ol` Scout or are you the new DAZ Ultra version? If you`re new, you haven`t tied her to the dentists` chair have you? If you`re the old Scout, are you better than ever before and do you come with any new added technology...I don`t know...like whiter than whites or you can wash under 40 degrees:)

And Shandana,

Wonderful read!!! what can I say. It`s the little details. I luv `em. BTW, respect to all the mothers out there. Such wonderful best-thing-since sliced-bread sons like me could never have been fashioned without motherly phalanges and that good ol` long term fuel that makes all mothers so cute and cuddly.

And guys/gals, let me know if this is abnormal but even though I`m not married or anything, every now and then I get clucky and go through Paternal motions. Is that normal?

Best Wishes,
Umer M.

This is great!

Sharply sweet interrogation of the role of Pregnant Young Woman/Motherhood...I particularly liked the author`s observations of the cultural enshrinement of pregnancy from civillians :)
Also, those questions about identity are ones I`d be interested in reading about; that theme is the motherload (sorry!) in this essay.
Our best wishes are with you. And yes, none pregnant people don`t know what they are talking about :)

saima,

agree with all you say except the bit about ...gives an incredible sense of meaning and purpose... unless you mean, for the first time i am scared to die. what will happen to my 2 little dolls!!!

hi shandana, congratulations!!
i resonate happily with all that u wrote as I am an old hand at the mom bit--let me tell all your fears about losing your individuality are correct---what individuality? which personal choice? constant guilt pursues me--every action has untold consequences...going out for 2 hours while kid is dumped on someone is an important decision. as for time, creative inspiration, love life these things belong to another universe and dimension. On the other hand--the importance of being a mom.. and the sheer delight of being with a child, gives life an incredible sense of meaning and purpose. u suddenly live not just for yourself but someone else. perhaps this is the only compensation.

then comes letting go....have no idea how parents do that. .but that is another story:)