Scaly Superb imagery. You said a lot here! Married to a reptile who is lubricated in the right places - the phenomenon, I would say is quite pervasive.

Really loved this poem. Thank you.

Anita

The Temptress at Barnes & Noble Dear Zehra,

The reason that there aren`t any good old bookstores, or other bookstores in your area is because Barnes and Noble probably swallowed them up. What I have against Barnes and Noble is that they cater only to popular taste. Try finding a book there on ancient Mesopotamian civilization or on Gandharan art, or the works of modern French theorists, or Espisito`s commentaries on the Islamic world, and you`ll see what I mean. If chain stores is all you have access to, for better coffee and a wider selection of books and music try finding a Borders near you.

As an aside, if you ask me, I would say that the coffee and books association has been taken a bit too far - so now you can go to bookstores and buy coffee or you can go to Starbucks and buy Oprah`s selections!

If you are ever in the Boston area, and in need of a memorable browsing experience, visit Wordsworth or Harvard Bookstore in Harvard Square. And if you want the experience of a lifetime, on your next trip to Pakistan, stop over in London and spend a couple of days browsing the bookshops lining Charing Cross Road.

Best regards,

Anita

It’s Time to Bomb New York Dear Saima,

As a thoroughly disaffected cynic as far as politics and politicians are concerned, here is how I would answer the questions you pose.

Were the bombings politically motivated? Absolutely. Does the US really champion the cause of democracy and freedom throughout the world? Of course not.

The US acts in pure self-interest - as all rulers and governments do, and have done ever since the imperial unification of Upper and Lower Egypt in about 3000 B.C. From the US point of view, the equation is simple. Where the British-appointed monarchic dynasties are alive and flourishing - the establishments remain very US friendly (examples Saudi Arabia, Jordan, UAE states, Iran during Shah’s time). To state the obvious, in return, these illegitimate governments get US protection. A recent (within last four weeks) essay of Edward Said’s on King Hussain of Jordan, in Newsweek comes to mind. Apparently, during the Arab-Israeli conflicts of the late sixties, Hussain had secret meetings with Golda Meir to brief her on Arab military plans. On the other hand, where monarchies have fallen by the wayside, military or quasi-military dictatorships propagated in the name of Islam exist (Libya, Syria, Iraq, now Iran). These establishments are very hostile to the US. Such hostility perpetuates their rule. Thus, given its vital oil interests in the region, there is every reason for the US to maintain the status quo in the area, and a continued military presence. If we use history as a judge, yes, they are imperialistic monopolizers- but perhaps a tad bit more humane than lets say, Alexander the Great, the Ummayids, Aurangzeb, or Nadir Shah when he sacked Dehli.

If there was no oil in the area or alternative energy sources would the US care? Of course not. Few in the US, or for that matter in the world care that millions are being killed in the Sudanese civil war, millions of Rwandans have died in their civil war, Burma has a really repressive regime, the Taliban kill their own people, India and Pakistan are engaged in mutually assured destruction - if it doesn’t affect them, its not their problem. Its that elementary! Its the kind of world we live in, have always lived in. The people who can fix these problems are people whose own vital interests are at stake. The people who live in those countries, or whose loved ones live there. Not the US. It would be naïve to expect the US to care for anything that doesn’t affect them in any major way. These countries and its people are like insects for them - if they get too annoying, its just easier to quash them with a firm hand, than to think about why it is that they are doing what they are doing. I am being very simplistic here - but when a mosquito is hovering around you for a blood meal, do you stop to think that its hungry, or do you just clap your hands to quash that little bugger.

This brings me to the question - why is national interest such a bad thing? The answer depends on which ``cause`` you think is worth fighting for. Some would say nothing (therefore one can safely predict that the Dalai Lama is never going to get Tibet back). Some would say religion; others nation; still others ideology. The common thread in all these ``causes`` is a desire for more power and more money. Through ``causes`` we can rationalize anything - whether it be razzias, atomic bombs on Hiroshima and Nagasaki, the suppression of East Pakistan, aiding and abetting terrorists, or our own nuclear explosions in the cause of national self-interests.

Then why does the US not ``come-out`` and say that it acts purely in its national self-interest, instead of rationalizing and cloaking their actions ideologically (freedom-loving, blah, blah)? Because governments perpetuate their rule (and have always done so) by fooling their people. No one is going to come up and say, ``We do this because we and our type want to make sure that we get more power and more money.`` Its for the discerning to realize. Rulers know that nothing unites and defines people (the masses) more than erecting an oppositional identity that all can love to hate - the common enemy. Now that Americans have essentially done away with Communist threat, there is the need for another bogey man. And Islam is such a ready target. The prejudice against Islam didn’t die with the Crusades. It was kept alive by the Catholic Church, and by the likes of Voltaire and Hume. Its just below the surface, and its easy to whip up in the face of repeated onslaught of images and words that describe terrorist activities and agendas of people using Islam as their ``cause``.

We, the Islam-loving, are also similarly inclined. We too need our modern equivalents of the pillars at Mina to throw kankars at. And America, the imperialistic and guady giant of today represents the devil incarnate. If Germany, or Japan, or any of the other countries you mention would have been the Super Power of the day, it would have been the devil incarnate - anything that helps us refine our oppositional identity and rev up religious fervor will do. I predict that the Talibaan will soon be eyeing Tajikistan and Uzbekistan as territory in need of some invasion.

SR says that the bombings were a politically brilliant move. I hold two diametrically opposed views depending on my level of cynicism of the moment. Opinion one is based on the underlying assumption that the US really cares about the safety of its citizens. In this case, the bombings were clearly foolish, because many more innocent citizens will die from retaliatory acts. If on the other hand, I assume that the US doesn’t really mind that a few people are expended here and there - through terrorist acts or in military combat, then it is a brilliant move. It can act as a justifier for continuing to maintain their tremendous military capacity, their huge nuclear arsenal, their submarines in the waters, and their satellites roaming the skies. Since the breakup of the Soviet Union, there has been tremendous pressure from home and abroad to make drastic cuts. Such continued military expenses seemed liked a huge over-kill. Well, here Osama bin Laden’s actions provide them a good reason (excuse) for not getting rid of much. He needs to be made out to be as big a monster as the former Soviet Union, and by God, overnight he is perceived to have become one by the American people. Brilliant!!

Anita

The Temptress at Barnes & Noble Zehra,

The reason you came back empty-handed from Barnes and Noble is simple - they hardly have anything worth buying, let alone worth reading!

Anita

The Amsterdam Treasures Thanks for the comments, everyone. It is interesting that there is no criticism. Perhaps unlike the ``Sex Everywhere`` article by AA, many are reassured that this is only a story - not based in reality, as AA`s account was. Or perhaps, as SR says, Malik Sahib is a model citizen, a mild personality - my characterization didn`t come very close to the real ``doers`` out there.

Yet, as the commentary so far states, the themes of hypocricy, treating domestic help as subhumans, or worse, physical violence and throwing people in jail on the basis of ill-founded suspicions, are all very real.

As for Kafir`s remarks: ``For an impressionable child like Hamza, the master-servant relationship being played out in a Pakistani household is a great training ground for the class divisiveness, power games, lying, and passing-the-buck that plague his society.``

....what can I say except so sad, and so true. Hamza will start on this road early - copying his father, yelling at the servants, to prove he is superior to them - all to the delight of his doting parents.

Anita

The Amsterdam Treasures Re: Asim Hayat and MAK

That this was a morality story is pretty obvious. But thanks to you guys, I have a chance to moralize on ``Children and Foreign Body Ingestions``, the unintentional moral theme here.

Two year olds are wily little things. They pretty much have access to everything in your house unless you lock things up, or put them in places where they can`t use chairs or stools to climb up to get them.

Ring ingestions are very plausible. Kids ingest all kinds of things (for a truly macabre experience, visit the Children`s Hospital, Boston`s third floor display gallery of items recovered (and diligently collected by some surgeons) from children`s guts since the 1930`s.

Most (about 80%)items ingested pass through uneventfully, even large coins (the most favorite item of ingestion). This is not to minimize the seriousness of the problem. Firstly, there is always the danger that something might be inhaled, rather than ingested - a life-threatening problem. Secondly, the item may have toxic potential - eg. button batteries which can leak alkali causing caustic damage. Thirdly, a sharp object can actually cause an injury to the gut. Finally, rarely, large, or unusually shaped objects can get stuck in the esophagus, or in the pyloric opening (stomach to intestinal opening) causing obstruction. If a child ingests something and the parent is aware of it (most don`t even find out until they see it pass), we usually get X-rays to make sure its not stuck at the end of the esophagus or in the pylorus. If not, we just assign the parents the happy task of watching it come out in the next 3 days or so!

So the lesson, as the parent of any 2 year old will soon learn is - constant supervision, thinking ahead, and making small objects truly inaccessable.

Anita

What’s in a name? BG and the Butt query,

BG,

After a long time...

I know one poor sod called Butt, who had such a rough time here in the US, that he changed his name to Butte (pronounced `beauty`).

Another howler...

Many parents in Pakistan have been naming their daughters `Unnus` - just that a couple of them have chosen the following unfortunate spelling - Anus.

Anita

Junooni Not to ``out-talk`` Aliya who is a bona fide psychiatrist (I just have an interest in the subject by virtue of having several relatives with the disorder) - about 1% of the population the world over has schizophrenia. It is probably a whole spectrum of different types of biological processes that produce similar clinical symptoms. There definitely is a strong genetic component.

Psychiatric services in Pakistan are abysmal. There are very few institutions that have the capacity to admit people. Committed individuals are treated very badly. Virtually all care is provided by family members. Coupled with the stigma of hiding mental illness, it creates a tremendous burden on the family with no access for relief.

Many patients also have to undergo forcible exorcization by peers/faqeers. Abuse of ECT (shock therapy) by untrained medical practitioners is rampant.

However, mentally ill patients in the US also do not receive the care they need or deserve. Most insurance does not cover mental illness. There is a serious shortage of hospital beds. From my experience from occasional moonlighting shifts in Boston Emergency Rooms, it takes hours to find a bed, if ever. Many deny admission if the patient cannot afford the admission. Just the other day, I had to send a violent, homicidal preteen home because we couldn`t find a bed for him in all of Boston.

Finally: Aliya, its good to see you here. You do skirt Sohail`s question. What motivates you to do this particular job (it can`t be just because you are good at it)? We all (at least I)think of psychiatrists as somewhat looney themselves (I actually know a psychiatrist called Dr. Looney!)- you are one of the most ``normal`` ones I know.

Anita

Cool Desperation RE: Temporal and Safwan

My interest in Lattoo, kite-flying, kabotar baazi,and gulli danda was strictly academic i.e. keenly observing the artistry involved - much to the chagrin of my father - an active participant well into middle-age. But I`ll have to ask my more ``tomboyish`` sister to oblige with some stories.

Here is an account of the bus stop par kharay larkay sey pehli mohabbat, or a version thereof.

During the Irani revolution, some young students that fled came to live in a house next to us in PECHS which had been converted into a hostel for use by Irani students (there were many old style apartment type building in this part of PECHS). They had enrolled in the nearby PECHS Foundation College for boys - thus, much to our delight, a constant traffic of ahem, good-looking boys was available to feast our adolescent eyes on (we had an extended family living situation, so several of us 14 to 16 year old cousins were involved).

One of these gentlemen impressed us particularly with the breadth of his shoulders, his well-muscled torso, the trimness of his waistline, but most importantly the dreamy stares he seemed to give in our general direction, standing out on his porch. Well, he captured our attention and imagination. He would invariably be wearing shorts that came up to his knees. These had not really caught on in Karachi by then and they definitely added to his mystique. We began calling him ``aadhi pant``.

Many forlorn looks were exchanged with aadhi pant, at first surreptitiously, then more boldly, but none of us had the courage to actually engage him in conversation. Then one day the unthinkable happened - he sent us a letter! I suppose since he didn`t know our names, it was addressed to no one in particular. You can imagine the fights that ensued over who was the true object of his desire. Anyway, the brouhaha that ensued reached the parents ears. Aadhi pant was threatened with dire consequences and tragically for us (we had hoped he would put up some resistance, prove his true love) he quickly lost the dreamy look on his face.

And so ended the phehli mohabbat.

Anita

Cool Desperation RE: Saad (not the author)

I have heard it rumored that the Pak-American bookstore on Zaibunnissa Street has fallen victim to this new form of Pak-Umreeki dosti - it is now to be a KFC! Tell me it isn`t so.

Anita

Cool Desperation Re: Naufal Yusufzai

``Also, how would one be a `cool` Pakistani freed from the soul-robbing influences on `angreziat`? (I want to be prepared to be cool when I visit Pakistan this winter ;))``

Here is a brief guide

1. (This is the toughest one) - speak only in the native language of where you are - don`t let a word of English creep in.

2. Dress plainly in simple shalwar kurta

3. Profess to all you meet that you hate Madonna and her ilk. Instead true musical enjoyment is listening to authentic Qawwali (I suppose some of the earlier Nusrat Fateh Ali Khan stuff will do, the later stuff is too pop-influenced, a better choice is Ghulaam Farid Sabri)and ghazals sung by Habib Wali Mohammad and Saigol.

4. Admit that although you are wholeheartedly for peace with India, that you secretly enjoy the milli naghmay of Malka-e-Tarannum Noor Jehan, alongwith highlights from Jamiluddin Aali such as jivae, jivae, Pakistan.

5. Be equally familiar with the works of Manto, Nazir Ahmed and Rushdie and be ready to recite at a moment`s notice the poetry of Iqbal, Akbar Ilahabadi, and Mir.

6. Feign overwhelming cultural fatigue if asked to go to tiresome establishments like Copper Kettle and Coconut Grove. Instead, insist on the truly authentic Bundu Khan. Even at the risk of typhoid fever and Hepatitis A (please get immunized before you go)you must try Baluch`s faluda.

7. Be appreciative of the nice weather you will get to enjoy in December.

8. Be appreciative of the incredible hospitality of your relatives and acquaintances, many of whom will put themselves out for you to a degree unimaginable here in the US.

9. Notice and comment on all the benefits of our extended family system, our respect for the elderly, our focus on children.

10. Talk about all the problems you see inherent in the American way of life - how the crass commercialism of America exported to the rest of the world really bothers you. And how sad you are to see that the Pakistani youth has chosen to follow the worst aspects of American culture - thanks to satellite transmissions of Baywatch, Bold and Beautiful, MTV, and Oprah - not to mention the worse of them all, the Indian ZTV.

Regards,

Anita

Cool Desperation Re: AJ

Eloquently expressed!

Coolness, as beauty of course, is very much in the eyes of the beholder. Angraziat has little to do with it. To me cool is being able to know Urdu so well, that one can compose poetry in it. Did you read that poem `Thanksgiving` - recently on Chowk?

Anita

Cool Desperation Re:Observer

``...how you can apply this definition to those who attempt to uncover the utter pretentiousness of the Pakistani elite, not as a jealous reaction, but as the hilarious farce it is.``


To the truism ``actions speak louder than words``, I would like to add a new one - ``words from real people are more believable than words from virtual ones``(sorry Temporal:) ).

So Observer, I will be convinced that you are a real liberal believing in your cause (instead of a half-baked one pursuing a life of comfort in the US, while decrying the same in the pretentious Pakistani elite) if you go back to Pakistan and

1. Renounce wealth accumulation (no more investing in stocks, putting money away in tax-deferred accounts to make some big bucks at the expense of the poor workers of the world, for example)

2. Live in a modest house (not in Phase V).

3. Send your kids to average schools (not elite schools) and definitely not to colleges in the US (a sure ticket to elitism, which forgive me if I am wrong, aren’t you guilty of yourself?).

4. Dedicate your life to alleviation of poverty in Pakistan.

If you are indeed planning to do this (or Bad Girl, the other alleged leftist among us, for that matter) don’t forget to tell us your name, and of course my hats off to you for having such goals. I for one, am not up for 1, 2, or 3, and I have no pretensions about that.

Incidentally, neither Saad, nor I, are into the party scene - never have, and never will be. Not here, and not when we go back to Pakistan. Its just not us - but if others enjoy it - that`s fine by me. Isn`t that the liberal spirit?

Anita

Anita

Cool Desperation Faisal, I know that you are right about PIB colony. My father (now deceased) after migrating got a small house with his parents there in 1950 because my grandfather was a clerk in the government. We lived there until 1970. I have great memories of that house and the dark narrow alleys surrounding it were a delight for a child`s imagination.

Gulshan well-populated in 1952? I am not so sure. That kind of surprises me.

Anita

Cool Desperation Reflections from afar.

We are the rats who deserted a sinking ship.
Now safely ensconced on dry land,
we can be glib.
We become observers (or bad girls),
demanding formulaic redemption from writers,
and other such pearls.
One of these is to be ``aware``
of the existence of the evil
of social status back there,
back there, where we came from -
what used to be yours, and my home
but Alas! No longer.

We are much safer here, observing the ship from far away,
doling out advice
for those who stay.
But perhaps not safe enough.
No, we still need the crutch of a pseudonym,
to stand up straight, to talk so tough.

We will struggle for human rights,
without revealing our name -
lest our loved ones should happen
to feel some shame
at what we say, yes, yes, that is the best way
to play this cyber game.
Which is fine by me, I say,
as long as the reader
doesn’t fall prey
to believing - here lay true moral conviction -
come what may.
Nay,
Just a big dose of virtual reality!


Anita

To Quota or Not to Quota Re: M. Aliani

A couple of questions - if we use the logic of proportional representation in the quota system, and more recent census estimates, would you agree that the allocations, as they currently stand, are unfair? If so, should the percentages be changed? If it turns out that in 20 years, 80% of populations are urban, would you still say the same?

Since quota is meant to be a short-term solution to the problem of unfair starts in life, wouldn`t it be better to identify some other means rather than ethnic/regional to decide who the under-previleged are?

Shouldn`t our efforts be concentrated on making sure that the majortiy of jobs go to the people who are most qualified for those jobs, reserving 20% or so for the underprevileged, and at the same time, increase ground-level efforts to provide excellent education to the disadvantaged so that they can compete successfully in the job market. We are presently a very marginal economy, and our country cannot forever afford to be hiring the majority of its people on a system not based on merit. If we don`t ourselves, those friends of ours from IMF and World Bank will soon do anyway.

If the quota system had been implemented as it had been perceived, i.e a short-term remedy put in place to increase representation at high governmental levels, while making sure every effort was made to improve education at the lower levels, things wouldn`t be in such a mess today - instead, the worst has happened. No effort was made to improve primary and secondary eduation. Instead, high level quota based placements continue unabated 20 years later. Well, hopefully, not for much longer. We should do away with the system of domiscile. People should be free to move and work wherever they want.

Anita