Muslims Not Married in America Naqshbandi,

In general, `crisis` is an overstatement...

Muslims Not Married in America kamath.

The problem is that reliance on servants creates the illusion of a poor work ethic and being spoiled. Not that they don`t cook or clean...or are doing something else with their time instead...

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Zerha,


``...its really sad that ur egos cant handle more but we have again, only ur mothers, women, to blame for that.``

I don`t know if it`s ego exactly...more like fear. I wouldn`t want to marry a traditional woman for probably the same reason grunge doesn`t want to marry a ``modern`` woman...just wouldn`t know how to interact with them.

Muslims Not Married in America grunge,

``in accordance with islam, i.e, stay at home, cook, clean, raise and take care of the kids.``

Woa...I missed this. You`re convoluting 1950s gender roles with ``Islamic`` values. The domestic diva role is hardly ``Islamic`` per sae. Most Pakistani women in the middle class that my mother considered, for example, neither cooked nor cleaned. That was what servants were for.

This offended her rural Indian sensibilities, where one is to wake with sunrise and start working in/out of the house, and retire when the sun has completely set. No doubt people from different ethnic backgrounds and social strata will have a different take. Many well-off Gulf Arab women do NOT take care of their own children, for example.

All can be ``in accordance`` (or reconciled) with Islam...but no single setup can`t please everyone. This hang-up for a sole, unitary way of practicing Islam is a political one. It`s also dangerous.

The fact is, you have a particular tradition in mind…and there is no monolithic Islamic tradition in this regard. Not by a long shot.

Muslims Not Married in America grunge,

You`d be surprised at how many working women are family minded. As far as I`m concerned, the so-called ``modern`` arrangements are simply the new tradition. The burden of raising a family in this society is, I argue, best handled by someone who was raised here.

Working mothers was a necessity for low income immigrant families such as mine was, so I`ve seen it work all my life. Dual income families is, in many cases, necessary for many to be squarely in the middle class. I don`t anticipate things being easy, but then a large part of that is how well I step up to bat...

To be sure, by seeking a career woman, I`m simply seeking a like minded person...but in the end I would want one who, like myself, is willing to prioritize family above all else.

The US Democracy Initiative and Israel dost,

Suicide bombers or no, people will complain. Those types of bombings are very recent in the history of the Palestinian struggle, which largely went unnoticed prior to them.

Muslims Not Married in America grunge,

Parents, from what I observe, play a key role in the dissolution of marriages. I hate to say it, but often the culprits are the mothers.

``I am looking for the so-called utopian subservient girl (like my mother), ``

You`re looking or your mom is looking? It`s one thing to know what you yourself want...things get hard when your parents disagree.

Personally, I`m looking for a working professional Muslim. My mother wants someone who`s a bit more `traditional`, whose ancestry is from specific areas of India (my God I never knew she was so bigoted!), certain height, got to have fair skin, and so on. Too much :-)

Muslims Not Married in America stuka,

``Serendipity``...for real? LOL :-)

Muslims Not Married in America hush,

Ahhh...and you must be the usual suspect.

Muslims Not Married in America ....okay...I think I get it now...author is actively looking but keeps getting rejected by our attractive and sophisticated American sistahs...certainly there are better ways to deal with rejection...

Muslims Not Married in America Let me nip this in the bud.

This article is ridiculously over simplistic, patronizingly sermonizing and places disproportionate burden of maintaining the family on women.

Given the interaction style of many chowkies, I wouldn`t be surprised if the author is a munafiq (in the true sense of the word) trying to mock conservative Muslims living in the West... or to simply get a rise out of the usual suspects here. His mission will be accomplished, no doubt.

When it is said to them: ``Make not mischief on the earth,`` they say: ``Why, we only Want to make peace!`` Of a surety, they are the ones who make mischief, but they realise (it) not. (Quran 2:11-12)

Does the author realize the mischief he is engaging in?

But having said that, I must concur that arrogance and self-centeredness on the part of men or women plays a HUGE role in the increase in divorce among second generation-ers of any ethnicity.

What to do? The author has only provided us with his own brand of arrogance...not much in the way of a solution now, is it?

Iranian Puzzle Urstuly,

Good points in 38, but who ever worries about sustainability? Even in the west there is a understanding (is it misplaced?) that new markets will emerge, and the workforce will shift as the trends of a new economy dictate.

So in 50 years, manufacturing will definitely move to virgin areas and untapped markets will be opened up. The trick for India and China is not to be one trick wonders.

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pmishra2,

Perhaps I shouldn`t waste my time commentating on obscure columnists remarks...but...

The article you pointed has hardly a coherent thought in it. The people voted for the person who will cater to their interests (or at least perceived to). The idea that the poor of Iran will benefit from headlong retreat from current policies and a complete opening up to the West is nonsense. It will be the already well-off (by comparison) middle class who will be the prime benefactors of that.

No one voted to ``remain in poverty`` or to keep an economic status quo in the rural areas. In fact, it`s precisely the promise of providing opportunity (through education, and investment) to rural Iranians that played a part in the electoral win of Ahmadinejad.

The appropriate questions are: will a policy of self sufficiency (like India had up till the 90`s) work for Iran, which unlike India has oil wealth to fund it`s experiment? What avenues are available for a transfer of technology and know-how? How will relations with the Europeans, Chinese and Russians change? Is cooperation with America a prerequisite for any kind of growth? Will catering to the lower class disenfranchise the middle class, in effect swapping one source of political instability for another, or run the risk of economic stagnation?

Iranian Puzzle sifzal,

I think that one can just as easily understate the progress India has made. Realistically, it is on track to becoming a Taiwan or Korea, and that`s damn good. It took some, say, 10 or so years for these countries to realize the transition from 3rd world to developed.

India has a huge population, and much of it is under the poverty line by Indian standards...much more so by Western standards. That, though, is changing for the better...and rapidly so. It`s this change and sustaining it that is important.

Relative to developed nations, China is nominally better and it`s progress much less transparent.

Both India and China share the same challenge...development with a huge population. Future stability in both countries, just like in smaller countries like Iran, depend on how well wealth and opportunity is distributed amongst the masses. A sustained base of people under the poverty line will probably translate to political instability in the long run.

As for the American debt to the Chinese...can the Chinese afford to have a bankrupt America? Who is the primary client of their industry? Without balance in trade, everyone will suffer. So we shouldn`t view the outsourcing boom in India, and the manufacturing boom in China as evidence of a potential dominating force in either of these two nations. Both nations are heavily dependent on the same market for their revenue. I am uncertain that imposing tariffs on Chinese goods, or imposing laws that limit outsourcing, will adversely affect the American/European economy as it would the Indian and Chinese ones.

Iranian Puzzle Charlie,

Europe and America shall remain dominant, with perhaps power shifting between the two, for some time to come. Militarily, and in terms of innovation, China and India simply do not compare.

This will change, but more along the lines of Chinese and Indian citizens playing second fiddle to European and American interests. Indian and Chinese growth is predicated on foreign funding, so it seems odd that this should be taken as a sign of advancing past these foreigners.

Military and economic dominance of Europe and America will continue unless China or India manages to rework the established ``world order`` to their advantage. Realistically, that means outgunning, outthinking and out producing Europe and America as a rival, not as a dependant partner.

I think the Chinese and Indian policies hinge on growth, not on fantasies of becoming global powers. In any case, talk of Chinese or Indian challenge to Europe or America is most premature.

Iranian Puzzle ``Thats true. I don`t think turkey and algeria are democratic. In turkey the u.s. aid-dependent army ensures that the gov doesn`t fall into extremist hands.``

No, the army protects the constitution against any and all ideological threats. Extremism, as their opposition to Erdogan suggests, has nothing to do with it although it makes a nice tune to play when queries by donor nations.

I believe no western state would behave differently if there were credible threats against it. France, for example, strikes me as a nation that would not shy from vetting candidates and reserving the right to even ban parties that hold platforms contrary to the secular principles of the state.

``In algeria the elections were cancelled because it seemed that the islamist would win.
I would have preferred islamic gov in both countries if the people want it.``

It certainly would have prevented a civil war, and have strangled the formation of the GIA.

But the point is, academic definitions of democracy can hardly do...

Iranian Puzzle Netizen,

Better in all respects. I`m not an anarchist.

Women were allowed to vote and run for office, although they could not run for the presidency.

The culling of a candidate list is not unique to Iran, and is often enthusiastically approved of by Western nations (the US in particular). Elections in Turkey and Algeria are closely guided by their military, which serve a similar function to Iran`s Guardian council.

One can only conclude, then, that Iran`s practice of culling candidate lists is hardly undemocratic with respect to Western perceptions of what democracy is, even if it is not a normative practice in the West.

Iranian Puzzle HP,

``You friend failed to mention that the Iran is the hiding place for most of the terrorist. He failed to mention that Iran is providing support to Iraqi opposition.``

Not really. In any case, support for political opposition, or even influencing Iraqi politics, is well within the right of the Iranian regime given the extent of American medelling in Iraq (which is total).

Needless to say, Iran under the Mullahs is perhaps infinitely better than Iraq without a functioning government...