The Other Arabia Ansari #102:

[Lubna; aap kissi ki ammi tau nahin? all ammis have this thing about bhindi. . . and tauri and arvy and baigan and shaljam. . .and only an ammi can give a dissertation on the sordid varieties of the gheeya. . . :)]

--nahi beta ji, hum kissi ki ammi nahi. and no - as is evident - ammis are not the only ones who can go on about such stuff. start cooking and running your own place and you`ll learn soon enough. (and if you`re working 5 days a week in addition to cooking and running your own place, you`ll go crazy soon enough. which is why hum abhi kissi ki ammi nahi banna chahtay...)

The Other Arabia ferzi - #92:

nah - not one to run away. not even from this chowk! :) but thanks. nice to be back...i think...

as for the bhindi - strange things u say? hmm…perhaps we should compare notes on this. ;)

[Arab women, not to worry...I was told real hot stories, and it does not seem like they are twiddling their thumbs while waiting....]
--yeah they`re definitely not sitting around twiddling their thumbs - can testify to some of those hot stories. they have a lot more interesting things to play around with! as my arab friends always say, ``u can`t blame us! damn the hot climate!``

The Other Arabia
farzana: really enjoyed reading this. would be interesting to read more from you along similar lines. now if you`ll accept my apologies for this intrusion. didn`t want to jump in like this but couldn`t help myself after reading the criticism bhindi was receiving...
...all of you who need some serious motivation to eat bhindi...wanna join us for dinner some eve? might help...
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Ansari:
[...I believe they have something fitting that description which they call koosa. I wonder if that`s the same thing as our gheeya...]
as you must`ve figured thanks to the photo provided by einstein ki brain wallah, koosa is definitely not snake gourd. and it ain`t gheeya either. if i`m not wrong about my veggies (and please correct me if i am), gheeya has two versions: one is round (kinda like a bigger version of teenday), and the other is the tori version - longer and darker (kinda like the cucumbers we get here in pk). koosa is lighter in color and more consistent in its shape.
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rsaxena:
#44 [...do you really want to be followed by religious police and risk a beating or two for ordering a beer?...]
the fact that this is not the case (hell, not even in saudi for that matter) is besides the point, but at least it can`t be as bad as being spied on by stinky police in civilian clothing and risk being dragged to the police station for failing to turn up for the daily ``reporting`` on time...
#83 [...of all the places in the world one can go to party, why go to dubai?...spain, rio, tokyo, berlin and south beach are a 100 times better... ]
true...the other places are much better for partying, but why not visit dubai also? there`s nothing wrong with experiencing another culture y`know... not your run-of-the-mill partying i assure you...
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veeresh:
#59 [c) What`s the going dowry rate for Arab men lately, any ideas? (The men give the dowry, you know that, don`t you?)]
the amount of dowry arab, particularly middle eastern, women demand has always been very high. main reason why many arab men prefer phoren wives, especially western. much cheaper to maintain, kum nakhray and more cooperative. in fact, in one of the middle eastern states there is such a high number of ladies aging in their intezar for some local guy to meet their demands and marry them (it`s still not acceptable for the women to marry outside their cultures), that the state had to intervene with incentives for their men to marry the local women.

Soulmate? O queen of henpeckers! O grand muftee of high-muck-a-muckness! O liberator of (your idea of) ``women’s lib``! O champion of brunettes (with gora rung and light-colored eyes)! O whatever!

your highnee! why doth thou waste thy precious energy - and cells that matter - by lambasting (some already ``abused``) members of the (much) weaker gender? (many of whom grace the alleys of this chowk as a means of momentary escape from the eves who already preside over their respective paradises) ...why must thou also turn this ``heavenly`` abode (er... well... sometimes) into hell for these poor, battered souls? in bichaaroun nay aakhir aap ki kya aur kaisay ghustaakhi ki huzur-e-wala? (or should it be huzur-e-wali?) what unspeakable crime have li`l sac, temporal, aamir and all the other socially challenged, intellectually handicapped, religiously confused, politically paralyzed, emotionally hopeless, parent whipped, semi-literate, good-for-nothing - and let`s not forget henpecked - paki men committed to deserve thy highfalutin jharroo ki maar? (and that, too, the sakh`t tinkay waala jharroo)

lay of ‘em, woman!



No offense intended, but sometimes one needs to be careful with one`s ``smart`` comments full of one`s own pompous perceptions lest one crosses the not-so-fine line between self-righteousness and haughtiness. Self-righteousness is one thing, haughtiness another. Ms Holier-than-Thou’s attitude epitomizes the latter rather well. And it doesn’t just end there... A lot of the times she`s bloody irritating as well!

Hope the example assists. :)

But then, this is my perception.

An Ode to Chowk a grand finale to poetry week? oops. think i`m a little late. oh well, what is new... late entrances (in every sense): the bane of my existence. or more correctly, the bane of the existence of the others in my life. only time i can remember making it on the dot was at the time of my birth. hmmm... upon reflection, think i got that wrong as well. khair... meri zindagi... ``snafu: how i muddled along in life`` (or ``how i muddled thru life``?) -- the title of my book -- if i ever become famous and write one (or get someone to write it... and then the movie, then the serial, then the... you know how it goes...) but if i`m not wrong - better late than never? oh heck, does it even matter?

aaaaanyway..... to matters at hand..... great one bina! would have enjoyed it even more had you mentioned, along with the other names, the love of my life - the haunt of chowk - the one and only.... JAY! :) (or.. wait... was that urstruly?)

and to the powers that be.....

yes! agree completely with tempu and the others - bina should be given a slot of her own in that eclectic box down there - she deserves it - she`d fit in more than comfortably with those already there.

and bina, hope you accept the offer if you`re made one.

La Excepcion (The Exception) stegosaurus #164:

(don`t know why, but just the way letters like P make you think along the lines of relieving yourself one way or another, your name always conjures up images of these extinct creatures in my mind... *yawn * how interesting...)

[I am not alluding, I am telling you: Why are you throwing a hissy fit over Pee-TV`s name?]

Huh? I`m not throwing a hissy fit. And even if I were, why would I throw a fit over such a name?? I`ve got better taste than that and have much more interesting stuff to waste my brain cells on, thank you! You`re the one using up your already few undercharged, overworked ones ``wondering`` about ``Pee-TV``. What a waste!

Shankar #163:

[You were remarkably insightful in your reply to Bilalji.]

--Unfortunately, wasn`t ME - sometimes I get ``possessed`` as well and start saying/writing all this weird, insightful stuff.... And then I come to my senses...

And yeah, notice how since Jay`s return, Urstruly`s not around anymore?

Brocade hamidm:

[..lust is a perfectly honorable beginning for the hetrosexual love that we are talking about - it is the minimum requirement ...]

--Yes, yes, for many it is a perfectly honourable beginning - and not just for heterosexual love I might add - nothing wrong with that. And there`s also nothing wrong with it being the absolutely necessary minimum requirement. But what I don`t understand is how can anyone EQUATE it with that thing called `love`.

[...if sarwat apa or auntie zeb were to catch you having lunch at papa salas with the love of your life we couldn`t marry you off to the one armed beggar or his friend, the stump-on-wheels, who makes a decent living at abpara - everyone knows the ``loose`` girls in town...]

--Not unless sarwat apa and auntie zeb were shown those pics you happened to come across of them having dinner with their husbands` business associates in a secluded dark corner of that place downstairs in lahore while their respective husbands were in isloo taking care of twinkle and sheri, thanking their lord they weren`t forced to accompany their beautiful wives on their weekend shopping trip to that horrid place full of paindoos.

What Constitutes Blasphemy? Folks, really sorry to disturb the heartwarming serenity on this thread..... Just need to pass these messages on to a couple of individuals here...

Jay! You`re back!! :)) And, for your own sake, great timing too... We were just preparing to exorcize Urstruly (live via satellite) and I`m sure you wouldn`t have wanted all those people watching you get beaten outta him by a maulvi.

SO glad to have you back though. And I can see you`re diligently at it again. That`s the spirit! Man, you were really missed. Alone, Urstruly just wasn`t good enough - y`know what I mean? The more the merrier.

Shankar #549:

You can`t hate me! At least on this day you shouldn`t! :( (It`s already Valentine`s where I am.) And anyway, the right to hate me is lovingly bestowed upon only SPECIAL individuals by none other than yours truly herself - when she`s in a generous mood that is. And that too only after they pass a very painful - literally - selection process. You`re not that special. At least not yet.....

La Excepcion (The Exception) ahmadb #149:

[Experience and self-reflection is often the source of transformation.]

--Jee haan professor saab, I agree with you completely on this. Combine useful experience and honest, objective self-reflection with some good guidance/counseling from others who`ve already been through a positive transformation, a person is well on his/her way to change for the better.

One condition though - and I`m sure you already know what I mean - a person must be willing to transform oneself and actually make attempts at doing so. Recognition of the need to change oneself and knowledge of how to go about it are not enough - they`re just the starting points. Asal kaam tou iss kay baad shr`u hota hai. Aur yeh kaam kabhi khat`m nahi hota. And any person willing to go through this constant struggle has my admiration and utmost respect.

Thank you Professor Bilal. :)

Yasser, since you`ve already been through some sort of transformation, (positive I hope), care to guide Urstruly here? :)

La Excepcion (The Exception) T-Rex #150:

So what are you alluding to here? The fact you have only a few brain cells or the fact you`ve been wasting them wondering about ``Pee-TV``? Or both?

Possessed-by-Jay #152:

Yes, same here but only because I know Jay`s spirit lives on in you. And y`all know how much I loved the guy. At least I won`t get a chance to miss him now.

Keep Jay`s spirit alive!

Long live Jay`s spirit!

(See, now no one can say I was bitching about him behind his back. :P)

Sheher Ka Larka, 1947 Rehan:

Thanks for explaining. This piece was definitely one of your better ones.

[I find that in all the partition narratives I have gathered there is a sense of living an incomplete life........The telling of the story is incomplete as well, I often get the feeling that things are witheld.]

--This I found very interesting. I haven`t talked to many individuals about their partition experiences - only a few elders in the family - but now that I think back to their stories, what you say does hold very true. There is a strong sense of incompletion.

I agree. My grandmothers’ stories of partition ARE the stories of their lives. Their lives, as the lives of countless others, were altered dramatically and permanently due to partition and its aftermath. Most of the stories narrated to me by the elders in the family have either ended on a wistful note or a sigh or with a distant look in their moist eyes. And yes, the long pauses and the withdrawals were always there. Was there a ever a sense of regret? I can`t be sure, never paid attention to this aspect. But there definitely was speculation at times over how things might have turned out differently. This was the case with my maternal grandmother specially. For her, life was rendered very incomplete by 1947 and the resulting events of the following few years - the cost was her husband.

[If we want to think about where we are going we should know what has happened to us.]

--We also need to understand what has happened to ``us`` if we want to think about where ``we`` are going. And in order to understand, there needs to be an element of empathy, specially since we`re dealing with a series of very sensitive and often emotional events that took place more than half a century ago. But how many of us are willing to empathize? How many of us are even ABLE to empathize as far as stories of partition go? (This lack of ability is not necessarily through a fault of our own though. It`s almost impossible to empathize with someone when their experience is alien to one`s own field of experience in every way.)

La Excepcion (The Exception) Shankar: If you had anything to do with ylh`s transformation, hats off to you. How about therapy time for Urstruly now? If you promise to ``cure`` him, I`m sure a few Chowkies would be willing to pool in some money to cover the costs of his ``treatment``. Though it is very likely therapy might not work if what I suspect is true.....

scout:

[Urstruly, remember Jay and how we used to hate his hatemonging messages? Don`t try to replace Jay.]

--Remember Jay? Scooty, you make it sound as if the guy has kicked the bucket..... Kaheen bicharay kee rooh bhataktay bhataktay Urstruly kay oopar tou nahi haavi ho gayee? ``The Haunt of Chowk`` (Twilight Zone music in the background)..... let the show continue....

Anyone know of some good maulvi we could get to beat Jay outta this guy? I can try and arrange for the kaali murghis and the bakras and the smoky effects and props and everything else the maulvi might need. Can also arrange for a set at one of the PTV Studios so we can beam the event live via satellite across the seven seas... (Then RSaxena won`t have to waste his precious few brain cells wondering so much about ``Pee-TV`` either - he`ll have his answer...)

scout, maybe you can harass some Chowkies into sponsoring this event?

Now, the only problem is Mr Possessed himself - how do we get him there?

Urstruly: Just make sure the guns are pointing the right way while you oil `em. We don`t want Jay let loose again... on the hunt for another Chowkie to ``inhabit``...

Of course, I might be very wrong about all this... The man could very well return from the dead as himself to haunt us living... Jay? You there? Come out, come out, wherever you are...

Anyone here believe in Ouija boards?

A Conversation with Om Puri rsridhar #80:

I`d like to add a few to scout`s list....

``Karb``; ``Hawwa Ki Beti``; ``Zay Zabar Paish``; ``Shehzori``; ``Afshan``....

Some long plays...

``Abh Tum Ja Saktay Ho``; ``Fanooni Latifay``; ``Half Plate``; there`s another long play I really like but can`t remember the name - Naveed Shehzad and Qavi (a photographer) play this old couple living all alone - I think it was from the ``Drama `83`` series or something - wonderful performances by both.

Also try and get a hold of some of the plays from the old AND recent version of ``Aik Muhabbat, Sau Afsanay``. It`s a series of single/double episode plays. Most are very well acted and directed.

And one of my all time favourites - I know scout`s already mentioned it - ``Angan Terah``.

Enjoy! :)

La Excepcion (The Exception) Mahim #72 & #113:

[I had never heard about the other books you mentioned. thanks. I`ve also been influenced a lot by Hermann Hesse, especially Steppenwolf. You must check it out. Also Camille Paglia, a super feminist, de Beauvoir amongst others.]

--You`re welcome. As for the others you`ve mentioned - nah.... not interested in any of them anymore - already been through my various phases... and they don`t seem to have done a lot of good for me in any way! Come to think of it, I don`t think any book or author has ever influenced me much.

[Lubna, what I meant by getting your hands dirty at Civil or Jinnah hospital was that those who have the time and money should go and do some volunteer work.]

--Huh? Er.. I think you`re mistaking me for Ms Shirin Ahmed post #70.

As for temporal`s work... (t, mind if I...? :))

Mahim, see that ``Search Articles`` under the banner up there? Type in t_e_m_p_o_r_a_l (w/out the underscores! :)) and voila! But I don`t remember any poems by `temporal` being published here by Chowk. That doesn`t mean he doesn`t write any - he`s written some very good transcreative stuff - but for that you`ll just have to visit his Dargah I suppose... (cyber-dargah that is...) As for the directions to this place, how about cutting and pasting the following link?

http://chowk.com/people/Tools/cc_printhome.cgi?temporal

(And if you`re lucky, (AND if you follow the interactive threads with a little more attention and interest), you just might come across a verse or two by his all time favourite living poet, `Anon Anonabadi`.... Selected and posted in some of the interacts every now and then by either temp himself or one of the other AA club members..... I must add AA`s work is just as good as temp`s, if not better. :))

PM #92:

[``Super feminist``, though?? Methinks you`ve got her pegged wrongly.]

--Pat, I`m assuming she was referring to Simone de Beauvoir when she used that term. Makes sense then.

Brocade Jawahara:

Finally got to read your story (thanks t!) and yes, it was a very interesting read. There are many ways this story can be interpreted and, of course, everyone is entitled to their own interpretations. I didn`t think it was about love as such. I think one of the main themes of the story was uncertainty. Uncertainty about what the future might hold. Uncertainty of what any commitment/relationship might hold. The story even ends on a very uncertain note.

hamidm:

[... desis talking about the ecstasy of love is almost as ridiculous as them talking about the bouquet of a fine merlot or the delicacy of prosciutto on melon ...] AND [they might be in love with the idea of ``being in love`` but most never experience the ecstasy of this beatific emotion ...]

--But the same can be said about non-desis. About everyone. I agree with you to some extent though - I think ANY person who has not experienced `love` is not qualified to talk about it in any way. It IS ironic - almost like a person talking about the texture, depth, intensity and the flavour of a brand of coffee s/he has only smelt and seen and MAY not ever taste. (Agreed however - for many desis, it IS like the blind man`s case.) How does one know what `love` is unless one has actually experienced the emotions/feelings? And I`m not talking about just `romantic love` - I mean all types of `love`: love for parents, siblings, friends, pets, God, etc.

Unfortunately, many individuals confuse `love` with other emotions/feelings. Perhaps they don`t KNOW what `love` is? Sticking to `romantic love`, in their eagerness/desperation to `fall in love`, it`s understandable how many individuals confuse one feeling for another. Take the example given by Omarphoenix - lust. (Personally, I find it quite perplexing how any person can equate their sensual/sexual desires with `love`.)

It`s not long before they realize their mistake though. And then `love` is blamed for all the disappointment and pains of `heartbreak`........ But even if you`re sure about your own feelings, how can you be sure about the other person`s? How can you guarantee the other person isn`t confusing `love` with some other feeling, like lust?

Waheed #47:[If a person is allowed to act and then evaluate, why is that so much in fashion than say, evaluate first and then act.]

--Ditto! And if more people evaluated first and then acted, I`m sure there won`t be as many `mistakes` or `heartbreaks` either. But then, there`s a limit to how much `evaluation` one can carry out. In the end, like temp and you yourself, pointed out, it`s a huge gamble - just like a marriage (whether arranged or, as Jawahara would put it, self-determined) - some are lucky, others aren`t.

Sheher Ka Larka, 1947 Rehan:

This was great! Really enjoyed it. Left me wanting to read more. And if Zehra`s interpretation is correct, I must say I`m quite impressed. But if not, then yeah - there is a strong sense of incompletion.

Asim:

``Toba Tek Singh`` was one of the first stories I read in Urdu and it still is one of my favourite ones. A very poignant story - the first one to make me realize how tragic 1947 had been for some.

[1947 is a suppressed memory for quite a few elders. Images, sounds, voices, feelings put on the backburner, in view of progress and a better future. Sometimes this repression comes out, when people are asked to stoke the old almost dead fires of yesteryears.]

--I agree. When younger, (way before I was able to truly understand the seriousness of the impact of 1947 on the lives of those who`d had to experience it), I used to be fascinated by how emotional some of the `buzurg` in my family would become when someone/thing or incident would trigger memories of ``woh din``. For me, these `buzurg` were the epitome of strength - especially emotional. So for them to lose control over their emotions when talking about something that happened decades ago was always a source of amazement for me. These `buzurg` were mainly my grandmothers.

I`ve grown up listening to many `partition` stories during vacations back home. Narrated - depending on which side of the border we were for the holidays - either by my naani jaan, who was a ``Pakistani`` (may God bless her soul), or my daadi jaan, who is an ``Indian``. Or sometimes my grandmothers would be visiting us. Either way, either side of the border, the stories were the same. The same tragedies, the same pain, the same suffering... And the same wistfulness. (I have very few memories of my daada abu - he died when I was a very young child - and have no memories of my naana abu. He was assassinated - politics - not long after partition. My grandmother didn`t remarry and, in her later years, she always wondered whether things would have been any ``different`` had partition not taken place. My mother, when in one of those rare moods, wonders along similar lines. She wasn’t even two when my grandfather was shot. I’ve only seen pictures of him.)