Dear LaDDu LaaDlay and Ranjit Singh! Stop this 'Pakistan Shining' bullshit

Yes, stop all this praise and admiration for Paki abilities. It is downright embarrassing, if not outlandish.

When it comes to our missiles, you see Lil slant-eyed Kims everywhere. But when it comes to Bangladeshi boom boom guys, you are quick to credit Pakis with the blame.

Take a look at the map, you foolish Injuns! Pakistan is a thousand miles from BD and a few hundred miles from Jaipur. You give us and our ISI too much credit. Most Pakis don't know who is launching them missiles in Bajaur. Heck, most Pakis don't even know what or where Bajaur is.

BewaqoofoN, we Pakis have a "president" who forgot where he put his uniform, we have ministers who can't resign, and we have two opposition leaders who don't like to meet anywhere inside Pakistan. One of these leaders has more hair on his head than your PM has between his legs. The other can't stop smiling since his wife died - I just wanna know who does his teeth?

Heck, we don't even know who or what killed our cricket coach - remember the one you Injuns were all excited about being murdered by Inzy!

Maybe, just maybe, the Bangladeshis are figuring out who is really to blame for the thousands (or was it millions?) of deaths in '71. Now, you want to split Pakistan into five pieces. Guess what? Each piece will sooner or later realize what you done and will come back to haunt your other haunts. Stop meddling in your neighbors' affairs and you might find that they will stop meddling in yours.

While you are at it, here are some other things that your favorite bete noire, the ISI, and Pakis are doing:

Causing the ground to shake in Szechwan (although most of us think it's some kinda soup)

Sending Nargis to Myanmar (although we are still mad at Raj Kapoor for banging that Momina - and we never heard of Myanmar. Is that the person who sang "Mere Pya Gae Rangoon?"

Arming the LTTE in Sri Lanka (We get the LTTE and LET all confused. We know we are responsible for at least one of them, but not BOTH. Frankly, we think it's a typo and really means something delicious from Starbucks)

Giving away free gold chains to demented Injuns down under (that one we can answer - the chains aren't real and they are not really free).

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